


Skeletons

by Arithese



Category: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles - All Media Types
Genre: Adoption, Brotherly Fluff, Car Accidents, Eventual Fluff, Family Feels, Gen, Heavy Angst, Hospital, Mikey-centric - Freeform, Neglect, Past Child Abuse, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Prison, traumatic past
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-03
Updated: 2019-01-19
Packaged: 2019-08-17 01:32:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 16
Words: 44,955
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16506719
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Arithese/pseuds/Arithese
Summary: Hamato Yoshi brought them all together because they had been abandoned by their own parents in one way or another, and they loved each other like a family. Mikey suffered the same fate, and he is adopted into the family, but he brings an extremely troubled past with him. The Hamato family tries everything to help Mikey overcome his past, the only trouble is; he doesn’t want them to know.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I just can't seem to get enough of human AU's! I've done 4 now or something? xD Whoops. But I hope you will like this one nevertheless! The story is based off an episode of Criminal Minds, but to avoid spoilers, I can't say which one yet… :D
> 
> And I'm really excited for you to read this story, and I would love to know what you think!

(Don's POV)

"Maybe it's time Mikey" Leo mutters softly, taking Mikey's hand. His voice gentle, and worried eyes looking at our youngest brother.

"No it's not" Mikey snaps, glaring at his oldest brother.

"It's been 8 months Mikey, 2 since she moved to New York.. " Leo tries again, his tone still soft as if raising it would shatter Mikey… which probably wasn't too far off considering what Mikey had gone through.. and what we were currently talking about. But Leo didn't, keeping his voice soft as always.

Like he always did when talking about difficult things.

"I don't want to see her" Mikey hisses, but he chokes on his own sob. Immediately, Mikey bit his own lip, a nervous habit that he had picked up a long time ago. Probably right after his life went to hell all those years ago.

"You don't want to see her or you think she doesn't?" I ask, voice sharp but not harsh. I glance at Raph for a moment, but he nods slightly. We've all been thinking the same thing, we could all read each other without a problem. Mikey was no exception to that rule, and we knew why he didn't want to see her.

Mikey snaps his head towards my direction, an angry yet desperate expression on his face.

"She doesn't want to see me Don" Mikey snaps, shrugging off Leo's hand and walking over to the window. He chuckles darkly, narrowing his eyes. "I don't blame her" He mutters, lowering his gaze, but his back still turned to us. His stance was tense, and he was clearly distressed because of our persistence.

It wasn't the first time we had tried to convince Mikey to visit her. Declining every single time so far.

But even if Mikey didn't want this now… No, he wanted to see her, he was just afraid of her reaction.

I take a shuddering breath, but I could see Raph already moving towards Mikey. At times like these we were still reminded of our past.. or more importantly, Mikey's past. This wasn't just a bad grade problem, or a bully. This was a problem that couldn't simply be fixed, it was a scar that would never fade.

It wasn't as simple as being scared to talk to someone. He had a legitimate reason to be scared, it was the whole reason he got into this mess in the first place. He literally gave up his life so he could avoid seeing her. I shudder, glancing downwards. Back then we didn't care about him yet.

We didn't know him back then, but he had almost died. He was convicted for life, and it was only Luther's, or rather Leatherhead's, stubbornness that saved Mikey.

"I can't see her Raph" Mikey mumbles, and I could see Raph nodding silently. He stretches his arms, gesturing Mikey to join him for a hug. Mikey eyed at him warily before walking straight into Raph. Immediately, my immediate older brother tightly wraps his arms around Mikey's body.

"She doesn't deserve it Raph… I can't do that to her" He mumbles in Raph's chest, but voice still clear enough for us to hear it. I glance at Leo for a moment, but he was fixated on his two other brothers.. a look of sadness on his face.

"I know" Raph whispers, rubbing Mikey's back soothingly. A sob escapes Mikey's throat.

"I can't do that to her Raph.. I can't ruin her life like that"

I close my eyes. Because it would. The moment Mikey would visit her, no matter what his intentions were… he would have to tell the truth, and it would ruin her entire life.

TMNT

8 months ago, January 2014

"Absolutely not Shen" Yoshi snapped almost, looking at his wife with a slight glare in his gaze. Shen sighs, glancing at the man standing next to her and giving him an awkward smile before turning to Yoshi again.

"I know it is not ideal Yoshi but Tyler doesn't have anyone else, we're his last option" She speaks softly, and Yoshi almost relents at that voice. He could never be mad at her, and he could rarely win a discussion with her. But this was different, this was potentially endangering his children.

He mentally shook his head, their children.

"Surely there are other options" Yoshi counters, desperately looking at his wife. But Shen shakes her head, and so does Tyler.

"There is always the option of putting him in a group home, but he needs a stable home right now" Shen argues.

"At least until we find him a permanent foster family" Tyler adds. "It's only for a few weeks, I promise."

"Why us?" Yoshi asks, and Shen glances at Tyler for a moment.

"You know why Yoshi. And you know him, I've talked about him before with you. He can't be placed in a group home" Shen tries again, and Yoshi frowns. He loved his wife dearly, and he loved that she was always willing to do anything to look after everyone. She cared for everyone, and was kind to everyone.

And while he often admired it, it was a hindrance almost right now.

Shen was right, he knew this boy. Tyler was the ex-husband of Shen's sister, having been divorced 7 years ago. But Shen and Tyler often kept into contact, even after the divorce. They were good friends, and there was no tension at all between Tyler and Shen's sister, and they could still get along great.

They still had a great friendship, which was great for Karai.

Tyler was a social worker, and Mikey… Mikey was the boy they were talking about. A boy with a troubled past, one Tyler often spoke about, one the news had often anonymously talked about in the past, and one Shen had told Yoshi about before the current discussion had even started to arise.

"Shit" Tyler suddenly cursed as an short alarm sound went off, and the door opened. All three whipped their heads around to see a guard guiding a young boy towards them. "I told you it was last minute" Tyler spoke quickly, hurrying towards the boy.

The blond boy flinched, but Tyler carefully put a hand on his shoulder, steering him towards Shen and Yoshi. Tyler looked at Yoshi, a hopeful look on his face. Yoshi directs his gaze towards the boy instead, Mikey apparently.

His blond hair was a mess, his skin was pale, and he had large bags under his eyes from the lack of sleep. There was a haunted look in his eyes, and tears were already brimming in his eyes. He knew what would happen, or what he thought would happen to him, and he had no idea who these other two people were.

Yoshi freezes slightly. He looked haunted, broken. Worse than Donnie was years back, worse than Raph was. And the only thing he could hear was Leonardo's small voice.

_"Leonardo he needs some space right now" He had told his oldest, but the boy was stubborn, and he shook his head._

_"He needs a hug dad" He retorted in a small voice. A hug, he needed a hug._

The boy in front of him, even more miserable than his two kids. He could see bruises poking out from under his clothes, the grazed knuckles that contradicted his current look. The broken boy, but the knuckles only told him one thing; he had fought with people in juvie. He was dangerous, a danger to his kids.

_But he needed a hug._

"Okay" Yoshi eventually spoke, and a smile broke Shen's face almost. But he looked at Tyler instead, and Tyler nods, knowing what Yoshi wanted to tell, knowing what his conditions were of taking the boy in.

"Until we find a permanent home for him, I know Yoshi" Tyler spoke quickly. "Hey buddy you hear that? You're going home with these two people for the time being" Tyler continued, glancing at Mikey instead. The blond eyed at them warily, before giving a soft nod. He didn't say anything as he walked over to the couple in front of him.

Shen smiled kindly, carefully wrapping her arm lightly around Mikey's shoulder, just barely making contact at all. Mikey still tensed, even if he saw the arm coming. Yoshi watched his wife with the boy, he would need a lot of work, it would take a lot of time for him to recover from his past.

But that wasn't their problem. Tyler would find him a permanent family, and they would be able to heal the boy. Their problem right now was providing a stable home for the boy, and make sure he wouldn't endanger their kids.

"Thank you again Shen, I owe you one" Tyler said, and Shen smiled, waving at the man as she started walking back to the car. Yoshi waved as well, following his wife and the kid towards the car.

Leaving the prison Mikey had just been released from behind.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I'm officially changing the review rule, because I am impatient as hell xD I will update every week, but if the chapter gets 10 reviews (excluding guests), I will update during the week as well! Probably on wednesday.
> 
> A bit of a slow chapter, and I'm not entirely happy about it but next chapters more will happen!

(Leo's POV)

"So who is he?" Don was, unsurprisingly, the first one to ask the question, glancing at mom with a slight frown on his face. I glance at mom and dad as well, probably just as curious as Don and Raph were to know. Mom glances at dad for a moment, before the latter sighs.

"We should sit down first my sons" He spoke softly, and I frown. Nevertheless, I sit down on one of the dining chairs, Don next to me, and Raph next to Don on the corner of the table instead. Mom and dad sat down on the other side of the table. There was a short silence before dad opens his mouth.

"That boy-" Dad starts softly, taking a breath. "He will be staying with us for a while until Tyler is able to find a suitable home for him" Dad glances at mom for a moment, who in turn smiled kindly towards us, as if she was trying to reassure us. Dad didn't need to explain who Tyler was, we had all met him numerous times over the past years.

He was the one to help Raph 8 years ago, and Don 7 years ago. He was the social worker, that helped Raph and Don with finding this house, he was the one responsible for my two little brothers being here today, so of course we all knew him. But that didn't explain why the boy was placed with us, or why he had looked like that. I frown slightly.

"What happened to him?" I ask, looking at mom and dad. The two exchange some more glances, mom looking at dad in an almost pleading manner but dad shook his head before turning back to me and my brothers. It was as if he was telling mom that she couldn't lie now, not with this boy.

And it seemed like mom understood, gnawing at her lip as she turned to us, sighing deeply.

"He received his injuries in juvie." Mom eventually spoke.

"What?!" Raph cried out. "Yer letting a kid from juvie stay at our home?" He asks, and Don elbows him.

"You almost got sent to juvie before." He mutters, but he turns to dad with a worried face. "But Raph's right, isn't he like.. dangerous?" Don continues, his voice low and uncertain. I just glance at mom and dad. But the former shakes her head, a kind smile on her face, a smile she more often than not wore.

"The only thing that's important right now is that he was wrongfully sent to juvie. He's not dangerous." Mom spoke, but the glance dad cast her way said something else. Dad's eyes weren't completely agreeing, there was a slimmer of doubt in his eyes as well. I glance at Don and Raph for a moment.

It was clear that dad wasn't convinced about mom's statement but at the same time… she loved us, she wouldn't take someone in who would potentially hurt us. She was overprotective of all of us. Even if neither of us were her biological children, she still cared for us like we were. She was our mom, and she loved us as if we were her own.

"So does he have a name?" I eventually ask, and mom smiles slightly.

"Mikey, and he's just a few weeks younger than you Donnie actually" She says with a light voice. I glance at Don at the mention of his name. I was the oldest of the four, but all three of us were born in the same year, 1997. I was born in May, Raph in June and Don in Augustus. We were all 16 right now, though Raph often bickered about not being the oldest.

It was all in good fun though.

"I'm assuming he's staying in the guest room?" Don asks, and Yoshi nods.

"Correct, I have sent him upstairs to change into different clothes and to wash up. He should be down any minute." Dad spoke in a soft voice. "I am not entirely convinced like your mother is but it is only for a few weeks and we will try to make him feel at home"

"Thought that was sorta obvious" Raph snorts, shrugging. I glance at him, trying to suppress a grimace. I didn't, but both Don and Raph had enough experience with foster homes, and especially new foster homes. They had both been pushed and pulled throughout cities and homes around New York City before they got placed here.

So they knew how it was to be the new kid in a foster home, and they knew how scary it could be, and the emotional impact it could have on the person, no matter how tough they were. But most importantly, they knew better than to not try to make Mikey feel at home, even if it was just for a few weeks.

My thoughts were interrupted when the familiar beep of the oven echoed through the kitchen.

"That's the lasagne" Mom laughs, standing up and walking over to the oven. "Oh hey sweetie." Mom says suddenly, and I frown, turning around. A boy with blond hair, Mikey no doubt, stood in the door opening, fresh clothes and hair still damp, and looking completely out of place.

"Have a seat, you're just in time for dinner" Mom smiled, gesturing to the free seat. Mikey glanced at the seat before reluctantly making his way to the chair, climbing onto it. The seat on the opposite of Raph, the corner.

"Hey, I'm Donnie" Don was the first one to break the silence, extending his hand. Mikey eyed at it warily, before his eyes travelled to Don's face. Still, he made no effort to shake Don's hand. The latter seemed to understand that a second later, coughing awkwardly and taking his hand back.

"Anyway.." He trailed off. "I'm the youngest of the three, those morons are my two older brothers, Raph and Leo, he's the oldest" I wave at the mention of my name. Mom smiles at no one in particular, putting the lasagne in the middle of the table.

"Be nice to your brothers" She waved at Don, and I grin. Don's only response was sticking out his tongue. "I can imagine this is all very overwhelming right now, trust me, we've had two kids like you before" She says, and Mikey actually glances at mom at the sentence, a curious look on his face.

"Raph and Don were in the foster care too. Raph came here 8 years ago, and Donnie came a year later. We adopted them both when they were 10" Mom explained, and I nod mindlessly. Mikey stayed silent, but his eyes travelled to me. He immediately averted his gaze however, when I caught his eyes.

"I didn't come from the foster system, I'm dad's biological son, mom isn't my biological mom but she raised me from the age of 2" I quickly explain it when I realised what he was asking himself, it was all too clear on his face.

"What happened?" Mikey asks softly, his voice slightly raspy. He looked away again, chewing on his lip in a nervous manner. It was like he was genuinely curious to know about us, but too afraid to ask it. Perhaps it had to do with his own past.

"My bio mom left dad for someone else just after I was born, and dad won full custody when she moved out of the state" I shrug. I didn't mind talking about it right now, not anymore at least. It had bothered me when I was younger. I mean, my biological mom hadn't cared about me enough to fight for me, or even stay in the same state.

I didn't understand why she would leave me, or why I didn't look like my current mom. Kids were curious as well, some mocked me and told me it was my fault that mom left me. It wasn't until I was older that I started to understand what it meant, and when dad was able to explain why she left.

But mom.. Shen that is, raised me as her own after she met dad. She was my mom, no doubt. And I found peace that I had a mom that loved me like her own.

Mikey nods slightly, not opening his mouth again.

The rest of the dinner we tried to fill the awkward silence that hung around the room, but I could see that we were all curious to know more about the quiet boy at our table.

TMNT

"Okay so tomorrow's Sunday so you don't have to get up too early." Shen said, wrapping new sheets around the pillows. "We do eat breakfast together on Sunday's however, so I would like you to be down at half past 9. Is that okay?" She continues, glancing at Mikey.

The latter was standing in the room, looking uneasy and twitchy but staring at nothing. He also didn't bother answering. Shen coughed two times, placing the pillows down on the bed.

"You share the bathroom with the other three, Yoshi and I have our own, which is over there" She continues, pointing to the door that was on the other side of the stairs. Mikey merely glanced at the door, but again, didn't say anything. "We keep some extra toothbrushes in the drawer in the bathroom, and you can borrow a pyjama from Leo"

Mikey nods slightly. It made sense, Don was way too tall, and Raph was probably too muscular. Leo was the best fit out of the three, even if they would probably also be way too large. Shen looks at Mikey for a few moments, before glancing at the pyjama she had already placed on the bed.

"Hey I know this is scary" Shen starts, placing a hand on Mikey's shoulder. Mikey immediately jolts at the contact, hastily taking a step backwards. Shen's face falls. "Oh honey I'm sorry, I didn't mean to scare you" She said, putting her hands up. Mikey eyed at her warily, but eventually nodded.

"I just.. Tyler, the social worker you met earlier, he spoke about you after you met Luther" At the mention of Luther Mikey scowls, turning his head away. "And I know you don't like him after what he did, but what I'm trying to say is that I know what happened to you, and I know you are innocent"

She took a deep breath, secretly waiting for Mikey to say something, anything at all. But the boy didn't open his mouth, or attempt to say something. Shen sighs.

"You deserve the world hon, you were ready to give up your life to protect her, and anyone who treated you wrong out there, in the court room, in prison… anyone who thought otherwise was stupid." This caught Mikey's attention, and he glanced at her for a moment, gaze softening ever so slightly.

Still, no word came out of his mouth.

"I'll let you sleep, I'll see you tomorrow" Shen sighs, turning around.

"Thank you" Mikey said softly, causing Shen to turn back to him. "For taking me in.. for now" A smile spread across Shen's face.

"Anytime hon, sleep tight" She spoke, and then left the room.

TMNT

"Morning" I yawned, rubbing my eyes as I stumbled into the kitchen.

"Morning" The rest greeted me, and I sat down on a chair, still rubbing my eyes.

"Couldn't sleep?" Raph asks, and I shrug.

"Didn't sleep well I guess" I answer, accepting a bowl from Don.

"Could the reason be our new guest?" Dad asks, putting down a plate of pancakes on the table. I look up, shaking my head.

"Nah, just couldn't fall asleep" I tried to assure dad, and it was the truth, even if I had been thinking about Mikey. "Speaking of which, are we going to hear what happened to him? Why he ended up in prison?"

"Juvie" Mom immediately corrected with a soft voice, winking at me. I roll my eyes, glancing up as mom and dad finally sat down as well. The only empty chair belonging to our newest guest. Mom glances at me.

"But I won't, that's his story to tell ...but I just want to say that it was all a mistake" Mom starts, and I can only nod. "He was wrongfully imprisoned for something, and he spent a year in Juvie because of it. But from what Tyler has told me, he is a good kid. The only reason he got into juvie was because he was a good person"

"How does that even work?" Raph asks, frowning.

"Raph" I hiss, glaring at him. "Let mom speak" Raph rolls his eyes at that, but even he was curious about Mikey. He was living with us for at least a few weeks, so that was understandable. We all wanted to know why Mikey ended up in juvie, and in the foster system.

Was Mikey's imprisonment connected to him being in the system or was he already in the foster system before getting into juvie? Though I think the most important question right now;, was mom right when she claimed that Mikey wasn't a danger to us, or when she said that he was wrongfully imprisoned?

"Like I said, he's a good person and he didn't deserve to go to jail." Mom said again. "Honestly, he just had a rough childhood." She continued, Raph grumbled low in his throat but didn't comment. Shen was about to open her mouth again when she suddenly noticed someone standing in the doorway.

"Good morning Mikey" She said instead, glancing at the door opening. I whirl around as well, watching him. He was currently wearing an old pyjama shirt of mine and some pants, and he looked a bit better, albeit just slightly.

"Hey" Mikey greeted uneasily, reluctantly walking over to the last seat. I glance at him. The clothes were a bit too big on his form. He was clearly malnourished, and he seemed really small and fragile.

"How was the bed, did you sleep well?" Mom asks, story already forgotten now Mikey was in the room. Mikey glanced at mom, before nodding.

"Yea" He breathes out, but not saying much else. Mikey sat down, shirt shifting slightly to expose some bruises that were on his collarbone and chest. I wince slightly, and I was starting to side with dad more and more. He had bruises, his knuckles were torn as well, he had fought in Juvie.

And he was in our home, I was sharing a bathroom with him. Was he truly safe?

"So I talked to the school the boys go to, and you can start first day tomorrow. From what Tyler has told me they keep up with your education in juvie" Mom starts, putting a pancake on Mikey's plate. The latter nods at the statement, confirming that he was, indeed, still taught stuff while he was in juvie.

"You'll be sharing the same classes with the boys for now, tomorrow is your fi-" Mom continued, but I didn't really listen to it. I knew what she was going to say, we've had a couple of foster kids before Mikey. Raph and Don were once foster kids, and they followed the same regime.

Go to the same school as I did, follow the classes until a permanent house was found for them, or when they went to another foster family. And to be honest, I could only really pay attention to the boy that was sitting at our table. He seemed so withdrawn, as if he didn't want to be here, but there was something else in his eyes.

A sense of longing, a desperation that was so prominent it was almost painful. And yet, there was something more. There was a sadness on his face, fear in the way his body was tense, even when he was surrounded by a loving family. There was a haunted look in his eyes, pain all too evident.

I glance at Don and Raph, and they looked right back at me.

It was clear what they were thinking, and it was exactly what I was thinking.

There was something mom and dad weren't telling about him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More mystery yay!
> 
> So Leo is Yoshi's real son, and his bio mom left him, Raph and Don were in foster care, and fostered by Yoshi and Shen before they were adopted. And Mikey is fostered by Yoshi and Shen right now!  
> And whatever happened with Mikey? :3 Who is her? And why does Mikey hate Leatherhead (Luther) Stay tuned to find out ^^ (That sounded God awful, I will just leave….)
> 
> (Also, all 4 boys born in the same year not too far apart? What a coincidence! *gasp*)


	3. Chapter 3

_4 days since Mikey's arrival_

(Don's POV)

"We're home mom." Leo announces the moment we walk into the home. I glance over to the left, where mom was sitting on the couch.

"Keep your voice down please" She responds quickly, standing up and walking over to the three of us. I frown slightly, keep our voice down? She seems to catch on, gesturing to the the figure behind her on the couch when she saw the looks of confusion on our faces. I glance at the couch, spotting Mikey curled up on the couch.

There was a blanket draped over his body, and his eyes were shut,  _asleep_.

"He hasn't slept well ever since he came to us, he fell asleep 20 minutes ago" Mom explains with a sigh. "So don't you guys wake him" She warned with a stern voice, but her face was filled with a gentle smile.

"School was great though, thanks for asking." I snort as mom walks back to the couch, Raph elbows me at the comment, rolling his eyes before walking away. I snicker, glancing at Leo. He shakes his head, following Raph towards the family room, I do the same.

"Three days of walking around eggshells" Raph mutters the moment I closed the door behind me. I sigh, walking over to the couch and sitting down, pinching the bridge of my nose for a moment.

"He came from juvie, of course he's not going to be comfortable" Leo retorts, sitting down as well. Raph groans.

"Shit Leo, ya know Case has been in juvie before. That's not how you come out of it" Raph mutters, glancing out of the window.

"Casey has been in juvie for not having his license on him" Leo snaps, rubbing his forehead. "He's been in there for a weekend. I'm not saying that  _this_  situation doesn't suck but you can't compare Casey's sentence with Mikey spending a year in juvie for God knows what" Leo continues.

"Leo's right, mom said he was wrongfully convicted. Spending a year in juvie is terrifying enough, spending a year when you're innocent?" I shake my head, trying to get the thought out of my head. Even if we weren't close at all, and Mikey would only be staying with us until they found a better foster family..

I couldn't help but see how damaged he was.

He was still pale. Not as much as he used to when he came to us 4 days ago but still pale. The bags under his eyes hadn't disappeared, the bruises were still visible and only just now starting to turn yellow. He was twitchy, withdrawn and slightly moody. He didn't speak much unless asked.

"Use your head braniac, mom and dad don't tell us why he was in juvie for a reason" Raph frowns.

"You don't believe he's innocent?" Leo counters.

"Shit, I don't know man. I'm just sayin' he's hiding something" Raph mutters, sitting down on the office chair with a frown on his face. I glance at Leo for a moment, who sighs, running a hand across his face.

"Can't believe I'm saying this, but I do agree with Raph on this one" Leo says softly, glancing at me again. I put up my hands.

"Don't look at me, I was thinking the same thing. I just don't believe it's all black or white" I defend myself. Leo nods absently, bringing his knees to his chest. Raph fell silent as well after that, the victory of us sort of getting to agree with him enough for now.

At least until the next time we were confronted by the teen in our house.

TMNT

"I am really sorry Shen but we haven't been successful so far" Tyler says softly, taking a sip of the coffee. "With his record, no one is very keen on fostering him" He continues, rubbing a hand through his hair.

"I can imagine" Shen sighs, looking down at her cup of tea, closing her eyes for a moment. "He hasn't been doing well at all Tyler, he's in a bad shape"

"How come?" Tyler asks softly. Shen glances around the room quickly, but the boys were all at school right now and Yoshi was still at work.

"He rarely sleeps, and he is scared. He doesn't trust us or the boys, for good reason" Shen spoke softly. "He's just not comfortable with us around, and he flinches whenever I try to touch him."

"That's certainly to be expected" Tyler mutters, rubbing his forehead. "Especially considering how his parents treated him, and made him do."

"It's just-" Shen starts, standing up and walking over to the window. "Have you seen the look on his face when he wakes up from a nightmare? Or the startled look when I touch his shoulder or something?" Shen cries out softly. Tyler sighs, standing up as well and walking over to the woman.

Shen sighs again, glancing at Tyler with tears in his eyes.

"I know Shen, I've been on Mikey's case ever since he was sent to Juvie. I talked to his therapist, I've talked with him multiple times" Tyler says softly.

Shen sighs. "I know Tyler, it's just so hard to get him to open up" Tyler nods absently, putting a hand on Shen's shoulder.

"With this history I'm honestly surprised he hasn't run away yet"

"You think he wants to see  _her_?" Shen asks, but Tyler immediately shakes his head.

"I asked him about that a few times, he doesn't want to see her at all." Tyler mutters, taking another sip of the coffee and walking back to the couch.

"He doesn't want to see her at all?" Shen asks with a frown, turning around but not moving from her spot. "After all he has done to protect her" Tyler frowns, putting the cup away and looking up at Shen with a dire expression on his face.

"He doesn't want to see her  _because_  he is still protecting her Shen"

TMNT

It wasn't even loud, and I probably wouldn't have heard it if I hadn't been awake. I frown, climbing out of my bed, and walking out of the room. For a second I wait, glancing at the door on my right leading to Raph's room but it didn't open after a few moments, neither did Leo's on the other side of the hall.

I turn left for Mikey's door. I carefully open the door, clicking on the light.

"Mikey?" I ask softly, walking into the room far enough to see the blond boy sitting upright in his bed.

"I woke you?" He whispers softly, looking at me with tears streaming down his face.

"No I was already awake" I snicker softly, taking another few steps. "But I am in the room next to you, I heard the scream" I continue softly.

Mikey swallows thickly, sniffling and turning his head away for a moment. I sigh, walking over to the wall, and leaning against it. I run a hand over my face, glancing at Mikey's form for a moment, but it was clear that he wasn't going to talk anytime soon.

"Nightmare?" I ask, but Mikey doesn't move. I sigh again. "Come with me Mikey" I say softly, and this time Mikey does look at me. I extend my hand, gesturing for him to stand up. For a moment he doesn't move, before he sighs, slowly getting out of the bed and standing up. He looks at me with a confused expression.

I just smile at him, gesturing for him to follow me.

I walk downstairs, walking through the living room and walking into the kitchen. Mikey followed me silently, sitting down on the table. I could feel him watching me, knowing he was looking at me with sad, blue eyes, but I ignore him as I walked through the kitchen, grabbing two mugs from the cabinet.

I just continue, blocking the light sniffles that Mikey was trying to hide. Several minutes passed before the microwave beeped. I glance at Mikey for a moment, but he was still huddled into himself, looking miserable, but his gaze travels to mine.

He glances at me for a few seconds, a slight look of confusion on his face. But I ignore it for a moment, grabbing the two cups from the microwave.

"Here" I say, handing him one of the cups.

"Cocoa?" Mikey asks softly, but accepts the cup nevertheless.

"You bet" I smile gently, sitting down at the opposite side of the table with my hands around the cup. "Mom used to do this when I got nightmares ever since I came here" I shrug, glancing at Mikey while taking a sip.

"Do you wanna talk about it?" I ask, but Mikey doesn't respond to me. I look down at the cup, his hands tightening around the cup.

"Why did you get adopted?" He asks suddenly, voice still as soft as ever. He glances up at me, a worried yet curious expression on his face. I smile gently, taking another sip of the cocoa. A few seconds afterwards, Mikey does the same, taking a hesitant sip from the cup, a look of content spreading across his face.

"It's not a very interesting story though." I say, looking down at the table again. "My mom gave me away when I was just a few days old, dropped me off anonymously with a note 'Take care of my little Donnie'"

"That's all?" Mikey asks softly, gazing up at me with anxious eyes.

"No happy ending there Mikey. She left me, they named me after the name on the note, and that's all I ever knew about my parents, or where I came from" I continue. "I spend 8 years switching between families until I got here"

"Your mom never reached out to you?" Mikey asks, and I shake my head, putting the glass down on the table again.

"They thought naming me 'Donnie' would give my mom or dad an opportunity to reach out for me later on, but no luck so far." I tell him. At first it had bothered me. I mean it still does, knowing my biological parents gave me up without anything that would point me to their direction.

I would never know who my mother was, who my father was. How they met, if they loved each other, what the family was like. I'm not able to find out where my intelligence came from. Was it my mom? Was it my dad? Or had it skipped a generation. If my bad eyesight was genetic, and in the family.

Small things that a lot of people take for granted, but something I would never know but desired so much.

There was a guilty look on his face, a look I couldn't really figure out. What would he be guilty about?

"But it's okay, it's not ideal but I found a family here. Mom and dad love me, and Leo and Raph are brothers to me in every way but blood" I continue, smiling at Mikey. "Do you know how long you'll be fostered?"  _Are your parents still out there? Is there a chance they'll take you back?_

Or basically, information on his past life. Because even after 9 days we still hadn't gotten information from mom and dad, Tyler, or Mikey on why the latter was here, what he had done, his past, why he had ended up in juvie and so on.

Mikey gazes at the floor.

"My parents are dead" He states, and immediately I can feel my body freezing. Yet, there was no sadness in his eyes, not more than there always was.

"I'm sorry Mikey" I whisper, but Mikey shakes his head.

"I'm not" He spat, a venomous tone in his voice. I frown slightly at the statement. So  _that_  was an interesting piece of information. His parents were dead, and apparently he wasn't the least bit sad about it. Abandonment, psychological abuse, physical abuse? Or did they just not care?

Or Mikey was somehow the cause of it, and not his parents. I shake my head, immediately banning those thoughts. The boy in front of me would never be able to hate his parents unless they did something, that much was evident.

"Why didn't you tell me?" I whisper before I can even stop myself. Mike glances at me, a slight glare on his face.  _Stupid, of course he wouldn't have told._

"I don't know you" He whispered, gaze softening ever so slightly before looking away. Then, after a long silence. "You'll hate me if you knew, and… " He stops, swallowing thickly. I don't say anything, silently looking at him to finish his sentence.

"And.. I don't want to go again. I don't want to go back to Juvie.. or sent into foster care… I… -" He stops again, tears streaming down his face. My face falls, and I slowly get up. I recognised that tone, because 7 years ago that had been me, begging my parents to not give me up yet again.

Another house that I didn't fit in, and I was sent back to the group home again, a place without loving parents, and where every day was uncertain. I knew how he was feeling, and I knew what it was like to feel so helpless, and not wanting to move again. And yet, never bothering to unpack all your stuff.

Because there was always the thought of having to move out of the house. After my third house I had given up on unpacking immediately. I wasn't in the situation anymore, but I  _remembered._

"Oh Mikey" I whisper, walking over to the other side of the table and sitting down on the chair next to him. "That won't happen, Tyler will find you a permanent family, parents that will love you" But Mikey shakes his head furiously.

"Tyler's not gonna find it, nobody would want me" He mutters. "I'm only here because Tyler knows your mom.. and she will happily throw me out in a few weeks"

"That's not true, and you know it" I almost snap, but I manage to keep my voice down.

"Yoshi didn't even want me Don" He retorts. "This may be my first foster home, but I'm not ignorant" He continues. I frown, because honestly? I couldn't even deny his statements. I've experienced it, Raph has experienced it as well. We both bounced from foster home to foster home.

Parents weren't actually nice all the time, both Raph and me have had parents who either didn't care, or hit us. I had gotten stuck in a home with people who didn't appreciate my smarts, Raph had gotten placed in a family that had a father with a temper worse than Raph, adding gasoline to a fire that was.

So Mikey's assumption of being put away soon probably wasn't far off.

"You'll find your family Mikey, I don't believe for one bit that you're a bad guy" I say, and he looks at me with a slightly shocked expression. Tears were still streaking down his face. "This cocoa break was supposed to make you feel better" I chuckle, glancing at him. Mikey chuckles despite everything.

He takes a deep breath. "Thanks for this Don, really" He looks up again, wiping away the tears on his cheeks. "The guards weren't this nice when I woke up" He mutters. I sigh, standing up again and gesturing for him to stand up. He does so with a slight look of confusion.

"I don't know how long you'll be here, but you can always come to me when you have a nightmare or when you want to talk about stuff" I tell him, putting both hands on either shoulder. I chuckle. "Besides, I've always wanted to be the big brother for once."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More answers! So Mikey's parents are dead, what happened to them? I would love to hear your thoughts. *hint hint hint* 10 reviews for an extra chapter on Wednesday :3


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We got to the 10 reviews, so that means, extra chapter! Hope you guys enjoy it! :D

_2 weeks in._

(Mikey's POV)

"Yer still here? Fuck man how long can those assholes put up with you?" I frown, but not taking my eyes of my locker in front of me. "Answer me asshole" The voice continued, shoving my shoulder harshly. I stumble to the side slightly, glaring at the boy that was standing next to me.

"Go away Scott" I mutter, averting my eyes again.

"Fuck it's really you. That's amazing, yo Tyler it's really him!" Scott laughs, I glare at him, slamming the locker shut. I don't bother saying more, turning around and walking away. "Hell no you don't" Scott calls out, and suddenly something wraps around my wrist, pulling me back. I whirl around.

The two boys stood tall in front of me, smug looks on their faces as they looked down on me.

"When did you get out of jail?" Tyler snorts.

"Hey!" Another voice suddenly calls out, and I look around to see both Don and Raph stalk over to me. "Get lost assholes" Raph snaps, standing next to me.

"So you were really fostered by these losers" Tyler snorts, and Raph glares.

"Say that to my face" Raph snaps, taking a step forwards. Tyler did the same, stopping just inches away from Raph, glaring down at the boy. Tyler was crazy tall, just like Scott was. Both super muscular, and while Raph wasn't short by any means, he was way shorter than Tyler.

"Your parents didn't want you Raph, and it looks like your foster parents found another boy like you" Tyler hisses, glancing at me. A stab of pain goes through my heart, but I just glare back at the two boys.

"They're not our foster parents, they're our parents" Don snaps, but doesn't move like Raph did. Over the past 2 weeks I had quickly realised the dynamics in the family. Raph was the jock, but the kind version. He was intimidating, but he cared about Don and Leo and would do anything to protect them.

Don was more timid, more laidback most of the times, but family was a sensitive topic for him. And it certainly wasn't the first time some jocks picked on either Don, Raph or Leo for being adopted.

"Adoption parents" Tyler retorts.

"At least my parents wanted me, at least they love us" Raph snaps. "Something I can't say about your parents"

"How the hell do you even know Mikey?" Don interjects, and within seconds I can feel all four of them look at me. I cringe slightly, resisting the urge to take a step back. But I stood my ground, something I had quickly learned in Juvie… or something I was forced to learn quickly.

"We spend a few months in juvie, isn't that right Mike?" I just glare at Scott for the comment. "I'm surprised they let you out, last time I saw you, guards were arguing that you deserve the death penalty"  _Shit_. I glance at Don and Raph, who were both staring at me with terrified eyes.  _Shit, they weren't supposed to find out_.

I take a shuddering breath, but before I could even walk away I felt a strong hand on my back. I glance to the left, seeing Don look at me.  _What the hell was going through his head right now?_  How the hell would he react knowing he was living in a house with someone who was wished the death penalty upon?

"Shit you didn't know" Scott barks out a laugh. "Good luck explaining that one Mike" He snickers, glancing at Tyler. The latter snickers, glancing at me for a short moment before the two of them both walked away, leaving the three of us alone.

"What the hell Mike?" Raph suddenly snapped, turning around and shoving me. "Fucking death row? What the hell did you do?" I stumble backwards, eyes going wide.  _I knew this was going to be his reaction, I knew they weren't going to like it, that they weren't going to accept this about me._

_So why the hell was I still so… surprised?_

_I knew that nobody was going to accept me the moment I was arrested, and the fact that I just narrowly escaped the death row didn't mean anything_.

"I-I…." I stammer, but I can't seem to formulate a response.

"Answer me Mikey!" Raph snaps, and now I was just glad the school had ended already, and the hallway was already empty.

"Don't start here Raph" Don softly said, stepping away from me and walking over to his older brother. Raph looks at me with distrust before sighing, giving Don and nod before walking away.

_I would've done the same_.

TMNT

"Don and Raph texted me they were eating somewhere else so we're just with the two of us tonight" Shen smiled brightly, walking into the kitchen. I glance up, elbows still firmly on the dinner table. Leo was training together with Yoshi, Ninjutsu, as they always were doing on thursday.

And I knew all too well why Don and Raph weren't coming home tonight.

"Shen?" I ask softly, and immediately the woman glances at me. No judgement in her eyes, no distrust, just love. "Can I ask you something?" Her eyes softened ever so slightly, and she nodded, taking a step towards me.

"Always sweetie" She confirms, she glances at the chair for a moment, and I shrug. She takes the chair however, sitting down and looking at me with a patient look on her face.

"Why did you decide to foster?" I ask eventually. "You don't have to answer it if you don't want to" I hurriedly add, but Shen just smiled again, waving me off.

"Don't be afraid to ask something Mikey" She says, but she took a deep breath. "I met Yoshi when Leo was just 2 years old. As you know, his mother abandoned him for a richer man. When she left the state without Yoshi's permission, she lost custody but she didn't seem to care all that much" Shen tells me, and I nod.

I knew this much already, at least, I speculated it.

"After some hesitance on Yoshi's part we started dating. And after 2 years we moved in together and decided to have a baby together" She glances away from me, laughing watery. "Leo was so excited to be an older brother, asking me constantly about the baby. When I was due, and so on"

I smile slightly as well. I could certainly imagine that. Leo was so overprotective of Don and Raph, of course he would be excited to be an older brother when he wasn't one already. And Leo basically grew up with Shen as his mom, she raised him, he was hers.

"We soon found out it was a girl, and we had already named her Miwa"  _Except.. there was no Miwa around._ "The doctors discovered she was dead when I was almost due, and I was forced to deliver Miwa's body" She whispered the last part, looking down. A lonely tear escaped her eye.

"I'm so sorry" I whisper, not even knowing what I could say in this situation. She looks up, smiling sadly and wiping away the tear.

"After my miscarriage, I became infertile so I couldn't have kids on my own." She tells me, a little bitter this time. She was so positive about everything, but it was clear that this part of her life still haunted her. "I was raised very strict, and I was always told that abortion was bad. The experience.. changed me"

I frown slightly. "How so?"

"I used to be pro-life, and I believed that nobody could ever decide for the life of another human being. But afterwards I had learned that the doctors were almost certain that Miwa wouldn't survive, but because they were against abortion, they decided not to tell me since abortion was an option in that hospital."

"They just… didn't tell you?" I gasp, staring at her. Shen nods.

"I don't want to acknowledge it really, but I almost died giving birth to Miwa. If the doctors had told me, if I had gotten the abortion the outcome would've been the same. Except I wouldn't have been infertile and I would have had a safe miscarriage." I can only nod, stunned by the information.

But also that she would tell so willingly. I would be gone in less than 3 weeks probably, she had no reason to tell me.

"The experience got me thinking, who were the doctors to decide that Miwa's life was more important than mine? If I had to die in order for Miwa to live, what choice would I have made according to my belief? They would've told me to keep the baby, that abortion is bad. And I would always put my children first, no questions asked, but I hope you understand what I mean"

Again, I nod.

It wasn't even that hard to understand. Pro-life was a belief with good intention for sure, and while I didn't support it, I could understand why people would be against abortions. Who are we to play God? But on the other hand, Shen was just one of the many examples. The doctors choose a fetus' life over a life that was already living so to speak.

They choose a fetus who, at that point, could not feel pain over a mother who could feel pain, who could die in pain just because they said abortion was bad. But if they were pro-life, what made them allowed to choose one life over the other?

"After I got released from the hospital I started doing more research, about both sides. I never really questioned my beliefs, but now I did" Shen continues, and I snap out of my thoughts, looking up at her again. "I started reading about mothers who had the same experience as me"

She took a deep breath again, but no tears were visible.

"Hundreds of stories of girls who got pregnant accidentally, got raped, got pregnant when they weren't ready to have kids. And all were denied by hospitals. They either sought out illegal alternatives or had the baby with dire consequences. Girls died because of the illegal abortion, girls were forced to drop out of high school, or they had to go to extremes to care for the child, starve themselves, live on the streets, steal"

Shen runs a hand through her hair carefully, but her posture stays calm.

"And then it's the fault of the girls right?" I whisper softly, and Shen, much to my horror, nods.

"The men told the girls it was their fault for getting pregnant, that they had to control themselves, or that they were only made for having babies." She confirms. "I'm not saying abortion is good, but it can be better than the alternative. Making abortion illegal kills girls, and forces children to have awful lives" Shen says, and I wince slightly.

Because that last part… that was a bit close to home for me. That was something I knew all too well, and by the look on Shen's face, she realised that too.

"I started reading stories of the kids, children whose parents were denied an abortion. Kids in foster care who were sad, didn't have a home or someone to look after them. Kids forced onto the streets when they turned 18, kids living in poverty and not being able to eat properly, or get proper.. anything"

I nod, glancing down at the table again.

"Kids whose parents turn violent" She whispers, and I glance at her again. I nod painfully, eyes burning with tears suddenly.

"Those too" I whisper in confirmation, but Shen already knew, she knew what happened, she knew what kind of assholes my parents were.

"I don't believe abortion is the answer to everything, but there are so many kids who are the victim of their mothers not being able to get an abortion. There are kids miserable, and I don't believe that that is better than removing them from the womb necessarily."

"But once the baby is born nobody cares where they end up" I mutter, and Shen nods.

"They don't, they advocate against abortion because they feel like the kids should have an opportunity in life and we can't decide to kill them off. But yet, they do nothing to care for that baby when they are born." She glances at me.

"And even then, denying a woman an abortion can have effects on her as well. People often ask 'what if one of those babies will have a medical breakthrough? But now can't because someone aborted him or her'. And then I ask myself; 'But what if that breakthrough was in my mind but I died when delivering Miwa? What if that breakthrough was in the mind of the girl who was forced to drop out of school?'"

Shen takes a deep breath again, calming herself a bit. "What if that medical breakthrough was inside one of the minds of the foster kids who no one cares about? Who are forced onto the streets without any money for college." She glances at me. "They pretend to care but they often don't. That's why I started fostering, or at least part of the reason"

"You wanted to give foster kids a home?" I ask softly.

"I wanted to give kids a loving home, my attention and love when some people who are pro-life don't"

"But you can't blame people who are against abortion for not taking care of those kids" I counter, and Shen smiles again.

"It's a difficult discussion, and you're right. I can't just say that pro-life people should help foster care, but I do find it odd that they do not seem to care for the child beyond the womb." She laughs silently, shaking her head. "I wanted kids, but when I couldn't I decided to help people in foster care"

I stay silent again, glancing down at the table again.

"I talked about it with Yoshi, and after a few months we had our first foster child. His name was Lin, but he only stayed with us for 8 months because his mom had an accident and ended up in a coma, there were no other relatives to care for him." She tells me. "We got two others who both left as well before we got Raph, and then Don"

"And they both stayed" I mutter. Shen nods with a bright smile.

"They were so sweet, Donnie was so shy, and never spoke. Raph was different… but also really reserved because of his upbringing. But I grew to love them as my own." She glances at me, and I glance back at her. That darn smile was back on her face again, a smile so foreign to me.

"Don told me about his biological mom" I mumble. "She never reached out to him?" I knew the answer already, no, no she had never. But maybe I was hoping for Shen to deny it, that she did behind Don's back or something like that. But this was real life.

"She never did" Shen confirms, slowly reaching out and sticking a loose piece of hair behind my ear. I suppress a flinch, resisting the urge to turn away. She smiles gently. "Did Raph open up to you about his past?" She whispers softly.

"Not yet"

Shen hums. "I think he will, I can see he's more open around you than other foster kids" She says. I almost snort, because after what he learned today there was no way he was going to open up. "I won't tell about his past, Raph wouldn't want me to. Just like I've been keeping your secret"

I look up at her, but her expression was sincere, honest.

"I know you don't like people knowing you. The police didn't mention your name but I know there are some kids at school who you know from juvie"  _Yes, Scott, and he told his friend Tyler_.  _But they wouldn't tell, they didn't even know much to begin with. They didn't know what I did, they only knew I was convicted._

_And the less people knew the better._

So I was okay with the compromise. Shen wouldn't tell me Raph's past, and in turn she wouldn't turn the guys about mine.

And I would be long gone before they even had a chance to figure it out. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So quick note, if you're a minor and commit a crime, or you're involved in a crime, apparently they sometimes keep your name out of reports to avoid it going public. So whatever Mikey did to end up juvie isn't known to the public, because his name was kept out of the reports and everything.
> 
> Also, I know the pro-life/pro-choice discussion is a very controversial one, especially now. And that's why I wanted to put it in there. I'm not bashing on people who are pro-life. I think it's good that you realise we can't just play God and kill off babies. But I think that the woman still has the right to say what goes on with her body. And doctors (and especially men) can't say whether they can get an abortion. Women don't just get an abortion whenever they feel like it, they have legit reasons, and even if they didn't, they are still entitled to that decision. Most arguments are heard are either based on religion (mind you, a religion that I don't believe in, just like ⅔ of the world), or arguments that are highly hypocritical and or can be debunked easily.
> 
> It's okay if you don't share these views, as long as you don't try to remove the rights for women to have an abortion.


	5. Chapter 5

_2 weeks in_.

(Mikey's POV)

 _I didn't have a lot of stuff_.

I glance down at my backpack, which barely filled but containing all the items and belongings that were currently mine. I look around the room. It was a nice room, not big but with a lot of windows. It felt cosy, like a home, a place to call my own. But that was just the whole problem right there.

 _This room wasn't mine, this place wasn't mine_.

I sigh, hanging my head. This was probably the last night here, no point in denying it. Even if I had no idea how foster care worked just yet, I knew that Shen and Yoshi would always put their kids in front of me, no question asked.

So when Raph would tell them he didn't want to live with someone who had almost been on death row, they would probably call Tyler the first thing tomorrow, or even this night already. It was probably happening right now. Raph had come home 15 minutes ago, Don would sleep over at a friend's house.

But I had heard them talking, and I knew they were talking about me. I could hear them, my name, words that can only be about me.

 _And I actually liked it here_.

"What are ya doing?" A voice suddenly interrupted my thoughts. I stifle a yell, whirling around. My eyes were big, staring at Raph in the doorway of my,  _temporary,_ room.

"Packing." I mutter, and Raph and I simultaneously glance at the backpack. A weird expression crosses his face before he shakes his head.

"Well don't," He responds, walking into the room. "Yer not going anywhere, not yet." He continues, reaching for the backpack and handing it to me.

"I thought you would want me gone." I whisper, but I take the backpack, holding it close to my chest. Raph sighs deeply, sitting down on the bed and glancing down. I frown at that, he seemed sad almost, conflicted. Raph glances at me, but I'm frozen on the spot, and I can't seem to move.

I would've understood if he would yell at me, if he would ignore me out of hate, out of fear for his brothers' lives.

"My biological dad is on death row." He suddenly mutters. I almost reel back at the revelation. His dad was on what now? His biological dad had done something so bad to deserve the death penalty?

"What happened?" I find myself asking, carefully sitting down next to him on the bed. He glances at me, nervously rubbing his hands together.

"I freaked out when they said the guards wished you had been given the death penalty, and then you confirmed it.. I just, I guess I just froze," Raph instead says. "My biological dad is an asshole, more than that. He's evil and deserves to die, even if I don't agree with the death penalty."

"I reminded you of him." I finish softly, and Raph actually nods at the sentence.

"I mean what the hell did you even do Mike? My dad did a horrible thing and all judges agreed on his sentence," He looks at me, but at my silence he sighs. "I thought you had to be a horrible person when I heard that, but you have been nothing but kind these last 3 weeks."

He laughs. "Shit, yer the first foster kid to constantly insist on helping out. And I… I believe mom when she says you didn't deserve to be on death row. Ya don't have one bad bone in your tiny body" I frown at the comment, and Raph grins slightly, nudging my shoulder carefully.

I can feel some tension draining from my body and Raph seems to notice, eyes lightening up slightly.

"You know how I ended up here?" Raph suddenly asks, and I look at him,  _Is he really going to open up?_. "My mom was 16 when she got pregnant, while my dad was 25. They weren't the best people.. shit, I mean they were fucking junkies." Raph mutters, not looking at me.

"Dad was a drugs dealer, a big one, and my mom couldn't bother to take care of a fucking baby" Raph continues, shuddering slightly. "When I was four my dad fucked up a deal, took hostages or some shit in his panic and shot two of them. One of them was a kid, just 13 years old"

"And that got him the death penalty?" I ask softly, and Raph nods.

"Death penalty" Raph confirms with a slow nod. "When that happened police inspected the house and found me. They arrested mom for neglect but couldn't tie her to dad's drug operation. Last time I saw both of them" He shrugs, but I can see the sadness that was in his eyes.

Of course he wouldn't be cool about it.  _Shit_ , and here I thought Don had the shitty life, but Raph was way worse. He knew who his parents were, he knew that his mom was a junkie who didn't care for him, he knew his dad was a horrible person who killed someone for his own gain without hesitance.

That had to be horrible.

 _And yet, I would rather have his parents_.

"My parents were on death row as well" I whisper softly, and I can feel Raph looking at me.

"Why are you here then? If they were taken off-"

"That's not what happened" I cut him off softly, looking up. It took him 4 seconds, 4 seconds to realise what that meant. His eyes go wide, a look of panic crossing his eyes.

"Mike.. Shit, I'm so sorry." He apologises but I shake my head. I didn't want to hear it, my parents deserved to die. And I was glad they were gone. They were horrible people, and they ruined my life.

"They deserved to die" I mutter, anger coursing through my body but for some reason tears jumped in my eyes. Raph looks at me. "No, I'm not crying, I'm just.. I hate them so much. I-"  _I really wasn't sad… I wasn't sad. I was angry at them, angry for fucking up my life, and angry at them for leaving me with their mess._

_I wasn't sad._

_But my body betrayed me._

I burst into tears. "I hate them" I whimper, and before I knew it I felt arms wrap around me. Raph scoots closer, and before I can even stop myself I bury my face in his shoulder, wailing. "They ruined my life.. I hate them"  _I wish I had never been born_.

Raph never let go, holding me tight while I just cried.

_I wish my mom never had me._

TMNT

"I don't want to die" I state, causing everyone in the room to look at me. Leo and Raph were at the table, eating breakfast. Shen was gone as she had to go to work early, but Yoshi was standing in the kitchen, making coffee.

"That's.. good" Leo says softly, and I would've laughed at his awkwardness if it wasn't for the situation. I look at Raph, but I can't get myself to glare. How could I be mad at him even if he stayed with me until I was done crying? Even if he stayed with me until I was tired enough to close my eyes and fall asleep?

"I know you told them Raph" I say, and a guilty look crosses Raph's face. I shake my head. "I don't blame you" I mutter, walking over to the table.

"I couldn't just not tell 'em Mike" Raph says softly. "Ya told me you wish you had never been born, I had to tell mom and dad you were suicidal"

"But I'm not Raph" I counter. "I wish I had never been born, my parents suck.. sucked, just my whole life is fucked up, but I don't want to die"

"What does that mean?" Leo asks softly, and I shrug.

"It means I don't want to die, but I wouldn't mind if I was erased from existence right now, and I wish mom hadn't given birth to me." I say softly, but the worried looks on their faces doesn't falter even one bit.

"Mikey, you realise how that sounds don't you?" Leo says hesitantly, and I sigh.

"I know Leo, but I'm okay, really. You can even tell my next family…. or the foster home I'm going to" Again, I shrug. I didn't really mind. It's not like they would care much in the foster home, or like the parents would care all that much. Who would care about my feelings? After all I had done.

I mean, I hadn't actually done anything, but I had allowed it to happen, and sometimes that was worse.

"We're just worried about you Mikey" Leo says softly. "I know it's none of our business but we know you don't want us to know about your past even though you're innocent, and now you're saying you don't care if you'd die?"

"You would hate me if you knew Leo" I counter softly. "And you would understand if you knew my story"

"Then tell us" Leo whispers softly, but I shake my head. Raph elbows him harshly, for which I'm glad actually. I didn't want to tell them, but right now I didn't really have an excuse except for the fact that I didn't  _need_  to tell them. I knew Don's story, I knew Raph's story, even Shen had told me her story.

And Leo and Yoshi had told their story the very first day already.

"He is not obliged to tell his story Leonardo" Yoshi cut in softly. "But I do feel the need to inform someone" He adds, and I shrug.

"Call Tyler, he'll put it in my folder for my next family"  _Or, y'know, the foster home_. Leo and Raph stared at each other, but their worried looks didn't disappear, and even Yoshi seemed unhappy with leaving it alone.

_Did they actually care?_

TMNT

_5 weeks in._

(Don's POV)

"Oh no you definitely cheated!" I laugh, shoving Leo away from him. Leo snickers, allowing himself to fall to the side and onto the couch.

"How would I even cheat?" He asks, and I pout. "Just admit defeat little bro, come ooon" Leo continues, wrapping one arm around my form. I sigh, turning to Raph but knowing better than to try and get out of Leo's bearhug.

"He's never going to let this down, is he?" I mutter as Leo wraps the second arm around my body as well. He looks at me, and he shakes his head.

"Not a chance" Raph confirms, and I roll my eyes. Then after a few moments Leo lets me go, and I immediately shove my oldest brother away. "Hand over the controller Don, it's my turn" Raph suddenly says, holding out his hand. I hand him the controller without any complaints, letting him take my spot.

I get off the couch, sitting down on the ground at the corner of the couch. We were currently in the family room, playing video games and basically celebrating that it was finally weekend. The couch in the family room wasn't the best or best-looking couch but that did mean we were allowed to walk and play on the couch.

Unlike the expensive one that was in the living room.

It was also a corner sofa, filling up most of the family room. In the open space was a TV, with playstation. It was basically a room for the three, or rather, four of us.

"You want to play?" Leo suddenly asks, holding out the controller to the boy sitting in the other corner of the couch. Mikey looks up from his book, glancing at Leo before shaking his head.

"C'mon Mike" Raph tries to encourage him. And I'm almost ready to stop my older brother, we knew better than to force him after all, but Mikey frowns slightly before glancing at the controller.

"I've never actually played" He admits after a while.

"Don't worry, Raph's really bad" Leo snickers, throwing the controller over to Mikey, who catches it with ease.

"Says the cheater" Raph jokes, throwing one of the pillows towards Leo. The latter laughs, allowing Mikey to sit down between him and Raph. I smile absently as Leo explained the basics of the game, actually quite surprised that Mikey suddenly agreed to join in on the fun.

It had been 2 weeks since we found out he had almost been on death row, two weeks since he talked about him wishing he had never been born. And it was as if that was the last push he needed to really open up. He started hanging out with us some more, engaged a bit more in conversations and was more present.

He started sitting in the family room when we were playing games, but he mostly kept to himself, either reading some book or drawing. It was a tad awkward at first, playing video games while Mikey sat in the same room, too shy to say something. But it became normal after a few days.

This was the first time we had managed to coax Mikey into playing with us.

 _And it only took us 5 weeks_.

I glance at Mikey again, a confused yet determined expression on his face as he glances at the screen. But before they could even begin the game, the door suddenly opened behind me. I glance to the right, seeing mom and dad enter the room. I frown, heaving myself up just slightly.

"What's wrong?" I ask, and dad glances at me with a reassuring smile. And then I realise what this was about, and I can feel a little bit of tension draining. Mom and dad had already talked about us, to me, Raph and Leo. We knew what was coming.

"Raph can you please shut down the game?" Mom asks softly, and Raph hesitantly does so, watching warily as Mom and dad sat down on the empty side of the couch. I guess he hadn't figured it out yet. "We have some good news, and some bad news" She continues, glancing at Mikey.  _So this was about Mikey's situation_.

At the mention of his name, Mikey shudders, and he seemed to shrink slightly on the spot, trying to make himself smaller than he actually was. But understanding dawned down Raph and Leo's faces.

"The bad news is that Tyler hasn't been able to find a family that wants to take you in" Mom says softly, and I can't help but to whirl my head around, looking at Mikey with worried eyes. Mikey doesn't look at anyone in the room, staring down at his lap with tears burning in his eyes.

But there was no surprise in the bright blue orbs, disappointment, sadness, but no surprise. He knew they weren't going to find a family.

"The… well hopefully good news is-" Mom continues softly, and dad takes mom's hand, squeezing it softly before looking at Mikey.

"We would like to continue fostering you Mikey" Yoshi concludes, and this time, Mikey's head snaps up, looking at mom and dad with wide and confused eyes.

"You… y-you would?" He stammers, and Shen smiles brightly, and nods. I can't help but smile slightly. Tears were now falling from Mikey's eyes, but he didn't move, eyes wide and filled with disbelief.

"We talked about it, everyone is okay with letting you stay" Shen says. "If you're okay with that, that is"

"I-I.. I don't know what to say" Mikey mutters, shaking his head afterwards. "No.. No I would love to stay.. I just.. why would you want me?"

"I cannot say I was not sceptical of you at first, but you have shown all of us that you have a kind heart. You are no danger to our family, Shen was right to say you were wrongfully convicted. And you deserve a home" Yoshi says in a calm voice.

"Whadaya say?" Raph grins softly, nudging Mikey's side. The latter glances at Raph.

"I would love to stay" He whispers, and both Leo and I smile at the sentence.  _5 weeks, 5 weeks was all it took for Mikey to worm his way into our lives._ Mikey suddenly goes rigid, turning to mom and dad. "Does this mean I have to tell them?" He whispers softly, and I can feel tension filling the air.

Mikey's backstory was still a sore spot, a forbidden topic so to speak. Mikey kept his past to himself, and both mom and dad didn't want to tell either if Mikey didn't want to. Not like we had asked much, we respected mom's judgement, and Mikey's wishes to keep it a secret. But still..

"Ya don't have to tell us Mike" Surprisingly it was Raph who spoke up. Mikey glances at Raph with panic in his eyes before turning to mom.

"It's your choice honey, but Raph is right, you don't have to" She whispers softly, but I knew that even she wasn't too happy with keeping such a huge secret about Mikey. We knew so little, but the way he was now was probably primarily because of how he got into the foster system, and juvie.

The only thing we knew right now is that he got into Juvie a year ago, he was almost on death row, but still sent to juvie. They discovered he was innocent after a year. Then he got out of juvie. But since his parents had been executed, rightfully so according to Mikey, he had to go into foster care.

And then there was this mystery girl. I heard mom talking about it once, a girl Mikey knew, from juvie or before he got into juvie. And he didn't want to see her, because he was protecting her.

_I mean I can't say I didn't want to know._

"I don't wanna tell" Mikey suddenly whispers. "But you can"

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TMNT
> 
> Next chapter, reveal time!
> 
> So apparently there aren't that many people on death row (Thank God), but in my story I already have 3, 2 of whom are already executed (Mikey's parents). Please accept this flaw in the story because I didn't want to change a whole chapter, and rewrite the majority of chapter 4…. whoops.
> 
> As always, 10 reviews for an extra chapter! :D See ya!


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guys! You are the best! Do you know that?! I'm blown away by the response on the story, and I'm so so glad that you're enjoying the story! As promised, an extra chapter because you are just the best audience a writer could ever wish for *hug*

_4 weeks in._

"Leo?" I heard a soft voice ask, and I turn my chair around, facing the door leading to the hallway. Mikey was standing in the doorway, looking as out of place as almost every day.

"What's up?" I ask, trying to sound casual but even I could basically  _hear_  the doubt in my own voice. Mikey glances down at the floor for a moment.

"Can I ask you something about your mom?" He asks, shuffling slightly on his feet. I frown at the question, completely turning the chair until I was comfortably facing Mikey.

"Why don't you ask her?" I ask, I mean mom was downstairs right now, probably cooking already. I glance at the clock, no wait, it was barely 5 o'clock. But Mikey and I both knew that mom was at least home with dad. And I actually had no idea where Don and Raph were, probably hanging out with someone.

Maybe Donnie finally grew a pair and asked out April.

I shook my head, that wasn't a problem for now.

Mikey frowns slightly, looking at me with a guilty expression on her face. "I didn't mean Shen" He whispers softly.  _Oh…. oh._  For a second I'm frozen, before the surprised looks forces its way onto my face.  _So he wanted to ask something about my biological mom_. "I-I mean if that's okay… but you seemed so open before.. so I thought-"

"It's fine Mikey" I cut him off, standing up. "You just surprised me, that's all." I reach for the back of the chair, dragging it with me to the bed. He seems confused for a moment, but I just gesture to the bed. He seemed to get the message, closing the door and walking over to the bed before sitting down.

I sat down on the chair, making myself comfortable

"What do you want to know?" I ask softly, feeling a little bit of unease creep up on me. I was open about my family for sure, I had learned to live with that part of my story for a long time now, but that didn't mean it wasn't a sore spot at the same time.

"I don't know really" Mikey shrugs. "I just… I know Don told you about my parents"  _About them being dead._ He stops himself, glancing at me.  _Shit_.

"Mikey… I do, Don told me because he was worried and-"

"Leo it's okay" Mikey interjects, chuckling darkly. "I mean.. I knew he was going to when I told him, if I didn't want you knowing… you get the point" He continues, and for a second time I was frozen for a moment, not knowing what to say. Then I shake my head with a small laugh.

"I won't tell anyone outside this house, I promise that" I say, and Mikey nods absently, not even looking at me for the moment.

"Thank you" Mikey whispers, glancing up at me. "Do you hate your biological mom for leaving?" He suddenly asks. His voice was still soft, hesitance and fear in his eyes. As if he was afraid I would suddenly attack him for asking such a question. As if he feared he had overstepped his boundaries.

But the question in itself..

I take a deep breath. "I don't know how I feel about her really" I admit honestly. "I'm mad, and hurt that she left me for such a stupid reason. But she's still my biological mom, and I just can't be mad at her for some reason" I snort at the thought. It sounded so pathetic speaking it out loud.

I was mad, that wasn't a lie, none of it was a lie. I often wondered if  _I_ had done something wrong, I had even questioned dad for choosing my biological mom if she was such a person that would just leave her son alone with his father. I hated that she was gone, I hated that she left me.

But I also couldn't hate her at the same time.

"I get that" He mutters, drawing his legs to his chest.

"You hate your parents?" I ask softly, and maybe… just maybe I was hoping for some more information about them. All we knew about him so far was the fact that he had been in juvie for a year, wrongfully convicted, and his parents had been killed on death row.

"No I hate them" He mutters, not even looking at me. "I just don't know what I should feel… if this feeling is good… Is it bad that I hate them?" Now he does look at me, tears bubbling up in his eyes.

"I can't say Mikey" I whisper. "But if they were on death row I don't think you are a bad person for hating them"

"I was almost on death row" He retorts, but there was no energy behind the statement, his voice dull, empty and tired.

"But you were wrongfully convicted"  _Even if I had no idea what the story was, mom had promised me that she was telling the truth. And I believed her._

"What if they were wrongfully convicted as well?" He whispers, and the tears finally won the battle, trailing down his cheeks. "What if they had more time and got free" It wasn't even a question really, not a question that needed to be answered anyway.

"Do you believe they were innocent?" I ask, but Mikey immediately shakes his head.

"No I don't, I just… I don't know how I should feel. I hate them, I hated them the moment I realised they didn't just  _not_  love me. I hated them the moment I figured out what they did. But I allowed it to happen… and if I did, what right do I have to hate them?" He whimpers, wrapping his arms around himself.

I carefully stand up, walking over to him and sitting down next to him.

"Would you blame someone for not defending him or herself with a gun to the head?" I ask softly, looking at his eyes. The light blue eyes sparkled with confusion, and he shook his head. "Why?"

"Because they could die" He whispers softly.

"Would you blame me for not running into an almost collapsing and burning fire?" I ask, and he shakes his head. "Would you blame me for keeping quiet in a hostage situation?" Again, he shakes his head.

"No" The voice cracks ever so slightly, and so does my heart.

"Why?"

"Because you don't want to put yourself in danger" He answers, and I nod. "But what if Raph or Don were in that building?"

"I would try to save them, I would give up everything for them." I answer honestly, almost chuckling at the irony that Mikey managed to turn my argument around. "But Mikey, I have no idea what your parents did. But letting something happen because you didn't know better, or you were afraid of your own life.. doesn't make you a bad person. It makes you someone who wants to survive."

"But others wanted the same" He counters, and the sheer terror and guilt in his voice almost makes me tear up, but I bite it down.

"And the fact that you realise that, the fact that you feel guilty for surviving-" I whisper, shifting slightly. "That makes you a good person Mikey, you are a good person because you realise that"

_Survivor's guilt they often called it_.

"But-" Mikey starts, but I shake my head, putting a hand on his shoulder.

"No  _buts_ , I understand that you do not want to accept that yet.. and maybe you never will" I stop again, but Mikey doesn't speak. "But you need to know that you are a good person, you can't convince me you are not. So don't try" I finish, smiling slightly.

TMNT

"So what are we doing out here exactly?" A voice asks, squinting his eyes as he looks up at the bright sun.

"Investigating" Kurtzman spoke quickly, padding Luther on the back and walking over to the prison. His team followed him silently, walking into the prison as well.

"Investigating usually means a crime scene for us" Luther remarks, glancing at his team, who were equally as confused.

"LH does have a point there Jack" Jhanna smirks, but continued to follow her superior into another room. Jack stopped, turning around and gesturing to the screens that were in the room. There was a guard on the chair in front of the screens, but he stood up the moment they walked into the room.

The team walked over to the screens.

"How familiar are you with the Feltner family?" Jack Kurtzman asks, and both Luther and Tyler Rockwell frown at that.

"Are you referring to the Queen's kidnappings?" The latter asks, and Kurtzman nods at the question. "What are we here investigating them? I thought they were convicted already"

"They are, they are planned to be executed within 35 hours" Jack confirms. "But they have suspicions that they have not uncovered all the bodies of the girls, and want  _us_  to find out whether there are more before they are killed"

The Queen's massacre, it wasn't a name that properly explained what had happened all those years again. There wasn't a massacre after all, but with the amount of girls that had gone missing, it sure felt like one to the population of Queens, or anyone else living in New York City.

Everyone had been on edge, until they found out the ones responsible.

A couple had been arrested just a year ago, after having been on the run for 5 years. And they were quickly linked to all the kidnappings that had happened over the course of years. 12 girls in total had gone missing, all having the same particular characteristic. Blonde, blue eyes, and younger than 16 years old.

All of them mutilated, almost unrecognisable for the naked eye. Tortured, maimed, hurt before they were all killed. Bodies eventually found after an anonymous tip was left 5 years ago.

So yes, the team knew about the couple, knew what they were facing today. And that piece of information made it a little more clear why they were, as FBI, called in to investigate.

"This is the couple we are investigating, On the left screen you can see Shawn Feltner, 51 years old and on death row for the torture and murder of at least 12 girls. The middle screen shows his wife, Michelle Feltner, 35 years old. Also on death row for the same crimes as her husband" Jack told sombrely.

The whole team watched warily. The screens showed the two individuals, both in their cells. They were the bright orange outfits, and they still had their hair. But they looked miserable, pale, malnourished, but no regret was in their eyes.

Luther watched uncomfortable. He was still new to the job, just 24 years old, and visiting inmates on death row certainly wasn't something he had wanted to do in his first few years, or ever really.

Jack moved, gesturing to the last screen.

"And this is their son. Unlike his parents he had not admitted to killing those girls but the judges still convicted him. 7 voted in favour of the death penalty, 8 against. But he will be spending a big portion of his life in juvie, and then prison"

"I didn't know they had a son" Jhanna remarked, and Jack shook his head.

"They never released his name to the public" Jack explained. "Or admitted that there was a third person on the job, he is a minor after all."

"So what is the name of our last suspect?" John Bishop asks, and Jack glances at him.

"Mikey Feltner"

TMNT

_5 weeks in_.

"Shit Mike" Raph curses, frozen on the spot as Shen takes a short break from telling the story. "That's so fucked up" Raph runs a hand through his hair, taking a shuddering breath. He knew of the Queens massacre. Of course he did, how could he not really? It had been on the news everywhere.

Newspapers, online, on the TV, just everywhere. 12 girls, over the course of 2 and a half years.

I glance at mom, trying to blink the tears out of my eyes. But Mikey was worse, tears were cascading down his cheeks, and now not because of happiness. This had happened to him, this was his life just 2 months ago. Two months ago the only thing he could look forward to was being in prison.

Guards watching his every move, assholes like Tyler and Scott bothering him. And basically just  _suffering_.

"Why didn't you defend yourself?" Leo whispers softly, and Mikey looks away in shame. A weird look crosses mom's face, and it was almost as if she wanted to say something.

"It wouldn't matter" Mikey mutters, voice laced with tears, and I could barely understand it. Leo's eyes softened, and he hesitantly twisted his body a bit so he was facing Mikey. "It wouldn't have made difference Leo… and I allowed to let it happen. I was … I was j-just so scared.. I-I wasn't allowed o-outisde and-" He broke into tears again.

That seemed to be the last straw Leo needed, reaching forwards and gently pulling Mikey against him. Mikey didn't protest, melting into Leo's embrace. The blond hid his face in Leo's chest, sobbing softly, and shaking like a leaf.

"'was s-so s-sca-ared" Mikey hiccups, and Leo shushes him softly, rubbing his back.

"I know" He just mutters, blinking the tears from his own eyes.

"Why did they release Mikey?" I ask softly, and Leo's eyes shift towards me. But he keeps holding Mikey tightly, the latter gripping Leo as if he would disappear if he didn't. There was a hesitant look on both mom and dad's faces, and mom's eyes flickered towards Mikey for a moment.

"I'm not entirely sure. The behavioural unit profiled both him and his parents. They managed to get Shawn to reveal the location of another girl's body but they also found both material and behavioural evidence that Mikey was the victim in all of this. And after 3 weeks they got him released"

I frown slightly, mom sounded uncertain, and the story was… too vague. But I just shake my head. I was just glad Mikey finally allowed mom to tell the story.

And for now, that was enough.


	7. Chapter 7

7 weeks in

_Guilty… guilty… you’re guilty._

_No., no I’m not. I didn’t know, I didn’t know about those girls._

_“You know that’s not true” A voice snapped, and I shrunk into myself. “You killed them all, you are just as guilty as your parents”_

_“N-No.. that’s not t-true”_

_Blood… screams… pain._

_“You neglected them”  A voice… mom. “You failed them”_

_“I-I.. please stop” I whisper, burying my face in my hands. A sob escapes my mouth.  Please stop… please make it stop. I want it to go away, all of it, everything._

_“You left me” A female voice, younger. “You left me to die”_

_“No… no y-you’re not-”_

_“Did you really think you could help me? Did you really think you could save me?” The voice continued, sharp, unrelenting._

_“I-I tried, ple-”_

_“You should’ve tried harder!”_

_No… no…_

“NO!” I cry out, shooting upright immediately. I blink, hand going to my face. Tears wetted my fingers, and I shivered at feeling.

“Mikey?” A voice softly called out, and I snapped my head to the door. I frown at the figure, Yoshi slowly walking in. “I heard your distress” He explains softly. I could do nothing but stare at him with wide eyes. Tears were still flowing down my cheeks but I make no effort to stop them.

Yoshi looks at me with worried eyes, and it looked foreign for him to express emotions so freely.

“Are you alright?” He asks softly, walking over to me and sitting down on the edge of my bed. I glance at him, before looking at his eyes.

“I don’t know” I whisper, shrugging. Yoshi hesitates for a moment, but slowly brings his arm around me. I immediately melt into the touch, surprising even myself by burying my face in his hold.

“It will be alright” He murmurs softly, and I sob. Tremors shook through my form, but I couldn’t stop myself. _You should’ve tried harder… I should’ve tried harder._ The voice was right, I should’ve tried harder to stop my parents, to save those girls and get them out. But I was afraid.

I was a coward.

“How about-” Yoshi starts, starting to untangle himself from the hug.

“NO” I cry out before I can stop myself, grasping the fabric of his shirt tightly in my hands. He immediately freezes. “Please don’t go” I murmur, keeping my face hidden from his view. He’s silent for a second before he tightens his hold on me as well.

“I am not leaving you, my son” He speaks softly. “I was merely suggesting we should go downstairs and get some comforting beverages.” I laugh shakily, nodding. That was the thing Don did when he discovered I had a nightmare, which wasn’t surprising as he had told me he gave me cocoa because Yoshi and Shen did the same.

Calm him down when _he_ had a nightmare.

“Okay” I agree softly, carefully sliding out of the bed. I shiver slightly at the cold, but I didn’t pay attention to it. Yoshi seemed pleased, exiting my room and walking downstairs without making a sound. I watched quietly as Da- Yoshi make the hot cocoa.

“Do you wish to talk about your nightmare?” He asks softly as he puts two cups down on the table in front of me. I stare down at the cup.

“It was just… stuff” I mumble. “My parents telling me I wasn’t good enough, and that I didn’t deserve _this_ ” Yoshi frowns slightly, a thoughtful look on his face.

“And do you believe such claims?”

I shrug slightly. “I know I shouldn’t… but I still feel guilty about everything” I answer honestly, Yoshi watches me with a soft smile before sipping from the cup. I follow his example.

“Did you hear other voices?” He asks after a short silence. I glance at him, but the look in his eyes already told me he knew that answer.

“I heard… _her_ ” I mumble, staring down. I couldn’t even get myself to mention her name, but I knew Yoshi knew who I was talking about. A weird look of sadness crosses Yoshi’s face.

“You have not contacted her yet?” He asks softly, and I shake my head. “And you have not contacted her parents either?” He continues, but I just shake my head again.

“It wouldn’t matter… I can’t see her without explaining my side of the story” I mumble, glaring down at the hot cocoa. “And I’m not doing that to her”

“You are allowed be selfish for once” Yoshi whispers softly, but I shake my head.

“Not to her, it would ruin her life”

“You know that is not true, you-”

“I’m happy knowing she’s safe da- Yoshi” I correct myself, rubbing my temples at the mistake. Yoshi smiled gently, reaching out to put his hand on mine.

“I know you may be reluctant to, but you are allowed to call me that” _Dad, father.. a parent._ “We have continued to foster you because we wanted to, you belong in this family” He continues.

“I know” I whisper, glancing down and refusing to look at him. “It’s just weird” I add after a few quiet moments.

“I can understand my son” This time I did look up, and I can feel tears well up in my eyes. He smiled ever so slightly, as some kind of reassurance or something.

“It feels weird calling you or Shen my mom and dad… but” I stop for a moment, biting my lip. “You’ve been more like parents to me than my biological parenets ever were”

And it may not be the best thing he must’ve heard, and it may not even mean much, but Yoshi responds by smiling broadly at me with fond eyes.

I may not be ready to call him my dad… _but he kinda was already_.  

TMNT

_13 weeks in_.

“Up you go Mike” Raph mutters, and I glance upwards. He was standing in front of me, looming over me with determined eyes.

“I’m fine Raph” I say softly, glancing down at my book again.

“It wasn’t a suggestion, c’mon” Raph insists, extending his arm. I glance at it warily, shaking my head again. “Unless you’ve discovered the Loch Ness monster in that lake, you have no excuse not to come with me” Raph snorts, and I turn over the page of my book.

“Funny you mentioned that” I remark dryly, and I can practically see Raph roll his eyes at the comment.

“Off your lazy butt” Then Raph reaches forwards, wrapping his hand around my wrist. I wince at the sudden and restraining contact, but either Raph didn’t see it or choose to ignore it, hauling me to me feet. I stumble slightly, but Raph just pulls me from my spot.

“Raph no” I try again, but Raph doesn’t listen, pulling me further into the sun.

“Raph yes” The older boy responds, and I glare at him, squinting slightly at the sun. “You’re already wearing your trunks Mikey” He eventually retorts.

“That’s because it’s actually really warm” I snap back and Raph just snickers, giving me a gentle push so I was forced to walk onto the pier. Leo looks to the side, smiling as he sees me. The latter was sitting on the pier, also in his trunks and his feet barely touching the water, body relaxed.

“Raph dragged you here?” He asks, but a smug expression was on his face. I nod, walking over to him and sitting down next to him.

I glance around, not able to hide a little smile forming on my face. It was peaceful here, and I felt myself relaxing even more. It was unusually warm for March, so Yoshi and Shen had made the decision to pack for the weekend and go camping... _somewhere_. I honestly had no idea where we were exactly.

I had fallen asleep on the way here, but apparently Yoshi knew an abandoned spot in the middle of the forest with a lake we could swim in. And because the water didn't come from the mountains, and didn’t go anywhere, it was actually pretty decent to swim in.

“I almost finished your book by the way” I softly add, and Leo glances at me. For a moment he just moves his feet through the water before smiling at me.

“I take it you like the book?” He asks, and I nod.

“Took me a few chapters to get into it, but it’s really good” I shrug, and Leo laughs, nudging my shoulder.

“You really like reading don’t you?” He asks, but I’m sure he already knew the answer to that. Yes, I did. he has seen me read countless of books, and to be honest, this wasn’t even the first book he had given me.

“It was one of the only things that I really liked to do in juvie” I whisper, I still didn’t like to talk about that particular time, and the guys knew to avoid it as much as possible. So why did I bring it up? _Because it helped talking about it_. I felt myself more and more comfortable the more the guys knew.

_And it scared me_.

“I can imagine, they didn’t let you out much did they?” He asks, but there was a gentle undertone in his voice. _You don’t have to answer it if you don’t want to_. We’ve already had our fair share of awkward moments of me not answering questions. But I just shrug.

“We were forced to do a lot of exercise, _that_ sure wasn’t fun” I mumble, casting my head down. Apart from that they tried to keep us as busy as possible. They still schooled us daily, so people who were stuck at least longer than the age of 18 would still have a high school diploma.

And for close to a year, that group included me. I had planned on finishing my high school in Juvie, and then go to an adult prison. But juvie was still a prison, my juvie was still a prison for teens with some of the worst crimes. There were fights, they would test you, intimidate you, or rise against guards.

The guards had to be super careful, and generally didn’t like any of us. And Leo knew, who looks at me with sad eyes.

“How about we go hiking tomorrow? Just the two of us” Leo suggests, and I glance at him. I was about to say no, but I frown slightly.

“I would like that actually” I say softly, and it wasn’t a lie. Leo was really chill with these things, and he really liked nature in the first place. So he wouldn’t just be doing it for me, I would just be someone who joined him on _his_ trip. No expectations from Leo, and no judgement if I didn’t say anything, or didn’t want to continue.

“Great” Leo beams. “I will ask mom and dad tonight if it’s okay, but I’m sure it’s fine” He says, and I can’t help but smile as well. He was a bit in between Don and Raph in terms of presence, Raph being more present, and Don being more reserved. But Leo was definitely the most cheery one out of the three.

Which made sense considering he was the only one who hadn’t been in the foster system.

I smile, until I suddenly heard someone approaching us quickly. I tense.

“In ya go” I heard Raph’s voice behind me before I felt a hand on my back, pushing me in. I cry out, water submerging me immediately. I splutter, kicking my legs until my head was above the surface of the water again. I could see Leo spluttering as well, kicking his legs to stay afloat but my only focus was on the pier.

“Raph!” I cry out, eyes wide before swimming over to pier and hanging onto it, panting ever so slightly.

“Afraid of the water?” Raph smirks, but the moment he looks down, I could see the slight hesitant look on his face. I just look at him. I knew they were just trying to make me feel included, _try to get Mikey involved_ my therapist had given as advice to my foster brothers, _involve him in as much as possible._

_But be careful with his psyche._

Especially the last past was hard, I could see Leo, Don and Raph trying to include me, trying to involve me in conversation, bickering and so on. But they also realised that I wouldn’t react well to everything. They often feared taking things too fear, and making me do something, or doing something that would scare me.

Right now, however, I just felt a slight annoyance at Raph for pushing me in… but I wasn’t mad.. if that made sense.

“Ha-ha” I deadpan, but a tinge of humour was creeping through my voice. Raph smirks at my expression, stretching out his arm to pull me out of the water. A sly smile spreads across my face, and I lurch forwards, grasping his arm and pulling him into the water.

I had to almost dive out of the way so Raph wouldn’t land on top of me, but he toppled into the water with a satisfying yell. I snicker as he comes up spluttering, looking at me with a surprised look on his face. But after a few seconds he grins, slamming his hand onto the surface of the water to spray me with it.

“He got you good Raph” Leo laughs, and Raph turns around in the water, giving him a face full of water as well.

“What, you didn’t wait for me?” Don huffed, walking onto the pier as well.

“Ya want me to push you in?” Raph snickers. Don glances at me for just a split-second before shaking his head.

“I’ll pass” He shrugs, sitting down with his toes slightly reaching the water. And I had a feeling Leo and Raph knew better than to push Don in right now. I sigh, carefully swimming over to the pier and heaving myself out of the water. There’s a strange silence as I turn around, sitting down next to Don.

“Mikey-” Don starts softly, eyes wide. “What is that?” He asks, voice tight as he gestures to my leg. Immediately I can feel a jolt of fear run through me, and my hands fly to my shorts, which were pulled up just a tiny bit to reveal the part of my leg I always wanted to hide from them… from anyone.

I straightening my shorts within seconds, covering the huge scar than ran horizontally along my upper leg

“Tell me that isn’t what I think it is” Leo utters softly, swimming over to the pier but not coming out yet, just looking at me with a worried expression.

“It’s not” I snap, standing up quickly. I was ready to walk away but I quickly found a hand wrapping around my wrist. “Let me go Don” I whisper, throat tightening painfully.

“Mikey please” Don mutters softly, looking up at me with desperate eyes. “Did you do this to yourself?” I shake my head desperately, trying to tug my arm free. But for some reason, I couldn’t even put my full strength behind that tug. I couldn’t get myself to _really_ try and escape.

“Why didn’t ya tell us?” Raph asks softly, climbing out of the water and walking over to me. He looks at me with worried eyes, and I can’t do anything but stare back at him. Then slowly, he grasps my right arm, bringing it closer and inspecting both sides.

“Because there’s nothing to tell” I whisper, never taking my eyes off my big brother…. my big bro. My arms, both arms clean of any scars that would suggest self-harm. Because I never did, I never hurt myself like that. “I’m not hurting myself”

And yet, I couldn’t reassure Don, because I did do this myself.

“Please don’t lie Mike” Raph shakes his head, and I notice Leo slowly climbing out of the water as well, but I don’t pay attention to it.

“I promise I’m not” _It was the truth._ It was one time, but not for _that_ reason. The wound on my leg….that was self-inflicted.

_But there was more to the story, something I wasn’t ready for them to know._

_Because it would mean they would find out about her._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Her, her her. Who is Her? D: Hehe.
> 
> I would love to hear your thoughts :3 As always, 10 reviews for an extra chapter! See ya! *hug*


	8. Chapter 8

_6 months in (July)_

"Hey Don?" I heard Mikey ask softly, announcing his presence. I turn around from my desk, looking at him. "Can I ask you something?" He continues, and a strange expression morphs onto Mike's face. He seemed anxious to be here, hesitant.

"Sure" I say, and he takes the invitation to sit down on his bed. I obviously don't mind, rolling my chair closer to my own bed, and looking at him patiently. I can see Mikey take a shuddering breath.

"How would you react if your mom suddenly contacted you?" He asks, and I can feel myself stiffen ever so slightly.  _I definitely wasn't expecting that_. I gape at him for a second, not really knowing how I should react.

"I don't know Mikey" I mumble honestly. "I don't know how I would feel about that" I frown slightly, glancing down. I wasn't necessarily upset with him asking about it, but it wasn't a topic I really liked to think about. Mikey knew this, he knew better than anyone that all of our pasts were a sore subject.

He knew better than to randomly bring it up. So whatever reason had to be a good one.

"But would you want to know where you're from?" He asks, but I knew Mikey already knew the answer to that question.

"I would Mike, I would love to know about my parents, or the reason why they left me" I state honestly. "But I would also be wary of them… of her. I think I would be angry at her, even if I want to meet her. If that makes sense" Mikey frowns, turning his head away again.

"Because she left you" Mikey concluded and I nod. Mikey bit his lip, not looking at me. "Would you still be mad even if she did it to protect you?" He asks, and I frown slightly, leaning back in the chair. It wasn't like Mikey was the first one to bring up  _that_ particular possibility.

I had thought of maybe every possibility why my mom had left me.

Child of rape, unwanted pregnancy, financial reasons, frustration. Was she forced to give me up? Was she forced to abandon me for whatever reason? Religion, personal gains, there were so many possibilities. And one of them being that she thought it was the best for me to give me up.

Financially, emotionally, physically…. anything really. But I had never gotten an answer, and would never get one probably.

"Depends" I say eventually. "I don't know how I would react… but if she did it to protect me rather than abandon me without a reason… I would be less mad"

This time Mikey glances up, looking at me. His bright blue eyes lock with mine, and I can see guilt swimming in his orbs. Eyes that got brighter every day he was living here with us, eyes that got brighter every time he got something off his chest, and eyes that got brighter every time he felt more comfortable around us.

Every time he realised he was family, and my only little brother.

"Why are you asking me this Mikey?" I ask softly, and Mikey bit his lip again before slowly shaking his head.

"It doesn't matter" He tries, standing up.

"No wait a minute" I call out, standing up as well and grasping his wrist. He glances down, but he doesn't flinch, not like he would flinch at any unexpected contact over these last 6 months. "You know you can tell me right?" I ask softly, not breaking eye contact, and neither does he.

Tears well up in his eyes suddenly, but he still doesn't turn away. I sign, wrapping my arms around him and bringing him closer. Mikey sobs in my chest, and I can feel his arms snake around my waist without hesitance.

"You don't have to tell" I mumble in his ear, but he just holds me tightly, as if I would disappear if he let go of me.

"I'm sorry" He cries, and I gently pry him off me, looking straight into his eyes.

"Don't ever apologise little brother, you know it's okay"  _It's okay to cry, it's okay to be sad, it's okay not to tell something about your past, it's okay to not be okay._  Mikey laughs shakily, wiping away his tears with

"I'll tell you Don" He mumbles, tears welling up the moment he tries to wipe them away. "But not now… I.. I can't" I don't say anything bringing him closer again.

"That's okay" I just tell him.

_And it was enough for now_.

TMNT

For now didn't seem so long after all. For now was meant to be days, weeks, months maybe. But that all didn't matter anymore when we came home the following day.

"My sons" Dad greeted us.

"Who's this?" Leo asks softly, putting his backpack on the ground against the wall. Dad didn't comment on it.

"This is Luther Head, he works for the FBI" Dad introduces the guy, who couldn't be older than 25, he looked really young.

"FBI?" Raph asks with a deep frown, crossing his arms warily. I put a comforting hand on his arm, but his form is still tense, muscles taunt.

"Behavioural unit" Luther waves off, but still, there was an FBI agent in our home, chatting up with Dad. Both Raph and Leo seemed to be on edge as well, and Mikey…. I whirl around suddenly, almost not believing was I was seeing. Mikey was seething it seemed like, an emotion I had rarely seen on him.

His hands were balled into fists next to his side, and shaking as if he was restraining himself from attacking the guy. He was glaring at Luther, bright blue eyes that were so much happier, that got so much happier the more time he spent with us, now filled with so much hatred and betrayal.

"Mikey?" I whisper softly, moving my arm towards him and putting it on his shoulder. Mikey doesn't acknowledge me, and it seemed like the rest noticed Mikey's odd behaviour as well.

"I had not invited him my son" Dad spoke softly, which only caused me more confusion, he understood what the hell was going on?

"Then you shouldn't have let him in" Mikey spat, and I can see Leo reel back in shock. Mikey had never been so angry that he'd snap at dad, or mom. He was always respectful, he rarely got angry in the first place but he never took out that anger on our parents, and even rarely at us.

This was the first time any of us had seen him so mad.

"Mikey I didn't come without a good reason" Luther spoke, but Mikey shook his head.

"I don't care, I never want to see you again" Mikey spoke, tears jumping in his eyes. His body started to shake ever so slightly, out anger? Out of frustration? Sadness? I really didn't know, but I was just too surprised to say anything. Anger was an emotion Mikey rarely displayed, sadness and laughter, but rarely anger.

But even now I could see it wasn't really anger. It was betrayal that showed on his face.

"I made a mistake in your eyes Mikey, but I don't regret my decision"

"You could've ruined her life" Mikey whispers, voice suddenly all too soft. Tears started to leak down his face. "You almost ruined everything"

"I saved you Mikey, I got you out of that prison" Luther tried to defend himself. "I got the judges to release you instead of keeping you locked up for life"

"At what price?" Mikey bit back, but his voice sounded tired. "What if I didn't want you to?"

"I want to believe that you did, that I did you a favour" I could see Mikey flinch slightly at Luther's confession. The voice of the older man was so soft, and hurt and guilt was in his eyes as well.  _What the hell was going on?_

"You were wrong" Mikey whispered. I frown slightly, because I recognised that tone in his voice, doubt. He wasn't sure about that sentence, he wasn't convinced that Luther was wrong, whatever they were even talking about that is.

"Maybe it's better if you go" Leo cut in suddenly, voice dangerously low. There was authority behind that voice, a confidence that was often so inconsistent. Leo was full of doubt, but when he had to step up as an older brother, nobody could or would stand in his way, not even his own doubt.

He was unwavering, relentless and determined to protect us.

Raph always said he found it annoying, Leo being a mother hen like that, but I knew that he secretly liked that someone cared about him so much. Of course he had a full family that cared about him, we all cared about him, but both Raph and I still bore those scars of being left alone.

We both had insecurities about not being liked. Raph more so than I had, I grew up without ever knowing my parents, Raph was given away, not cared about by his own biological parents, and that hit him harder. But it was also his personality, he took those things more personal.

Luther blinked in surprise at Leo's suggestion, but my oldest brother didn't seem to care, walking over to Mikey and stepping partially in front of him.

"I merely wanted to tell Mikey something" Luther spoke softly, sounding hurt.

"I already know" Mikey muttered, and I glance at him with a worried gaze. He was shaking slightly on the spot, but now not out of anger anymore, but out of fear.

"It is  _not_  appreciated as you can hear" Leo added, voice dripping with venom as he slowly reached out for Mikey. My little brother instantly melted into Leo's side, calming down a bit.

"It means get the hell out" Raph snaps suddenly, and Luther snaps his gaze towards him, frowning for a moment before looking at dad again. Dad was looking between us and Luther with conflicted eyes. I could see the fondness in his eyes over Leo's actions, protecting Mikey like his real little brother.

(I mean at this point we were all family, it didn't matter that we weren't related by blood)

But he wanted Mikey to listen to Luther, he didn't want to disrespect Luther for some reason. There was a look of appreciation for the young FBI agent.  _And again I wondered, what the hell had Luther done to make Mikey so mad? But what did he do right for dad to appreciate him?_

"I am terribly sorry Mr. Head" Dad spoke softly, but he glances towards us with a look that was all too clear,  _we would always come first_. "I think it will be wise to continue this conversation another time"

Luther nods timidly, following dad for all but two steps before he stops again. "I am truly sorry for going against your wishes young one, but I would not have changed a thing" Luther spoke softly. "You deserve to be selfish for once in your life. Contact her" He adds, and with that, he walks away again.

_Contact her._

_Contact her._

_Who was her?_

"Let's get you somewhere quiet" Leo whispers.  _But at this moment that really didn't matter._ Mikey nods tiredly, allowing Leo to guide him towards the family room again.

And Mikey never spoke the entire afternoon we were in that room.

TMNT

"D?"

I glance around at the call, a weird sense of pride filling my chest. Mikey stood in the door opening, looking at me with a nervous and also hesitant look on his face.  _And he called me D_.

I don't even know why I was so proud of hearing it. But it meant that Mikey was getting more and more comfortable around us, around me. And nobody called me D, it was only Don or Donnie, or any other nickname they came up with.

"What is it?" I ask, scanning him quickly. He seemed physically okay, he just seemed nervous, really nervous.

"You remember how I reacted to Luther?"

"The FBI guy?" I ask, and Mikey nods. How could I forget that really? Mikey as angry as I had ever seen him, more betrayed than I had ever imagined. I would never forget that, and especially not after 3 days.

"I think I'm ready to tell you guys" For a second I had no idea how to react to that statement before the sentence seems to hit.

"Why you hate Luther?" I ask softly, heart beating in my chest. I didn't want to frighten him right now, or push him away by being too urgent. Mikey shrugs.

"That too" He mutters, glancing at me with teary eyes. "I want to tell you about  _her_ " There was a weird emphasis on the last word, but I knew why he did that. We all knew, and Mikey probably knew that we knew, that there was a girl,  _girl, her, she,_ or whatever she had been addressed as.

But we had no idea who  _she was._ We had no idea why  _she_ was so important to Mikey. How  _she_  had changed his life. Or why  _she_ was the reason Mikey was willing to stay in prison for.

"Just me or…?" I stop, biting my lip softly, but Mikey shakes his head.

"Raph and Leo are already in my room, I wanted to tell you three at the same time" He says, gesturing for me to follow him. I do so, silently standing up and walking out of my room before walking into his room. As Mikey had said, Leo and Raph were already waiting, both in Mikey's bed.

Mikey's room wasn't particularly big, neither were the rest of our rooms. The door was located near the left corner and when you entered you had a table on the left wall, with a bed behind it. The head was on the left wall as well. Behind the end of the bed was a space big enough for a bookshelf. On the right wall, the same one that had the door, Mikey's closet was located. On the right side of the room, in the middle, he had his painters easel.

I walk over to his desk, sitting down in the office chair. Mikey walks over to his easel, moving it before sitting down on the carpets that were on the ground. He had always preferred to sit on the ground while painting, and even when watching television for example.

"I don't really know where to start" Mikey mumbles, glancing down at the ground instead of us.

"Take your time Mikey" Leo urges, and I can't help but notice how the three of us were staring at our youngest brother. Like we were an audience and he was about to perform some great monologue.

"I guess I'll start with  _her_ "

Again the mention of the girl. And right now I felt myself caring very little about reassuring Mikey. Not like I didn't care about his feelings anymore, cause I would never  _not_  care. But I didn't try to stop him, I didn't try to ease him. I just sat there silently as Mikey took a deep breath, looking at the three of us.

" _Her… she…_ I don't know what you've been calling her, or what I've been calling her these past 6 months-" Mikey chuckles dryly, and it was clear he was stalling. But still I made no move to stop him. Mikey had a tendency to ramble, but right now I was too curious and Mikey clearly too anxious to be stopped.

Mikey took a deep breath again. "She's my little sister"

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> DUN DUN DUN How many of you guessed it? How obvious was this reveal? XD


	9. Chapter 9

_7 months ago_

"November 29th, 2007 was the day the police got an anonymous call" Kurtzman speaks, quietly but with as much confidence that was to be expected from the man.

"Did they ever found out who the caller was?" Jhanna asks, but Jack shakes his head.

"They didn't, but whoever called came from a public phone in a library, and told the police what the family had been up to" Jack answered. "That was the first time we discovered that the couple had a son, Mikey." He continued, gesturing to the screen.

"Shawn Feltner was brought in for questioning but they had to release him without any proof, and they didn't have a search warrant yet. When he realised that the police were onto him, he and his wife decided to leave town and flee." There was a strange look on his face, a face of hesitance almost like he didn't want to continue speaking. "While the two parents packed, Shawn ordered Mikey to dispose of his youngest sister, as she would slow them down"

"They had another child?" Jhanna murmurs, Jack nods.

"She was 6 years old at that time according to investigators but she had also been a secret to the government. Both children just did not exist"

"So they just didn't go to school?" Luther asks, but again, Jack shook his head.

"The son did, but he was enrolled under a fake name. The school never questioned it because Shawn and Michelle always paid on time so they had no reason to be suspicious."

"No right to be suspicious? The kid didn't exist" Jhanna scoffs, but Jack waves her off.

"What of the girl?" Bishop eventually asks. Jack sighs again, opening the file he currently had of the whole family.

"As Shawn has put it: 'She is a girl, why should she?'." He states. Jhanna scoffs again, rolling her eyes in disgust. Luther puts a hand on her shoulder, but Jhanna doesn't react to the touch.

"What happened with the girl?" Bishop asks softly, almost too reluctant to do so. Jack scrunches up his nose, and the team knew the answer before he even opened his mouth.

"Mikey followed orders, and disposed of her" Jack said. "Hours later the police decided to investigate the house still, and they found the mutilated bodies of at least 12 girls. But the family was long gone"

"They were caught 5 years later, and Mikey confessed to killing his sister, but never said to have any involvement in the kidnapping or murder of the girls" Jack added.

"But he never denied it either?" Luther questioned softly, but Jack shook his head as a way to deny the statement. But nobody would question it really. It had happened 2 and a half years, those kidnappings that is. That would mean Mikey was 7 and a half when the kidnappings started, and 10 when they ended.

They already didn't believe he would have killed his sister, they already believed that was actually his parents.

"So how are we going to handle this?" Jhanna asks in a low voice, glancing at the three screens before her. Luther was standing in the back, looking uneasy and entirely out of place in the prison. Jhanna couldn't scoff though, she understood that this would be his reaction to this place.

Luther was still young, innocent. He would never hurt a fly, and took this job because he was qualified, over qualified even and liked it.

And she would never ridicule her team… her friends, for their fears, even if she had no fears coming into a prison like that. Those assholes deserved to be locked up in here, and they were safe from the inmates so there really wasn't any reason to be afraid of being in this place.

"We split up, interview the family separately and see if you can undercover something" Jack Kurtzman spoke, glancing at the screens for a moment before turning back to his team. "Rockwell and Jhanna you go interview the father, Shawn. Bishop and I will interview the mother, Michelle. Luther, you interview the son"

Luther seems slightly relieved that he was allowed to interview the kid instead of the two adults, but a linger of doubt and unease still remained there.

"Any evidence I should know, or can read over before?" Luther asks, and Jack nods, handing him the file.

"Familiarise yourself with them before you step in, interview will be in an hour. In the back are reports from his last year in prison. They can be valuable as well" Jack spoke, and Luther nods with a determined look on his face. "The rest of you, try to see what makes the parents tick, see if you can make them reveal anything about the girls"

"That should be difficult. Shawn Feltner is a sexual psychopath" Rockwell muttered, gazing at the files under him about the man. "A sexual psychopath who craved power, manipulation, and control." He clarified at the slightly confused looks on the faces of his team. Jack frowns, walking over to the file.

His eyes skimmed over the pages. "Incapable of guilt and remorse" He stated without any emotion, but the whole team knew better. "Michelle was just an object for him, a possession he could dominate"

"Just like his victims" Rockwell finishes, and Jhanna scowls in disgust.

"He thinks he has won. He won't reveal anything because that means he will lose" Jhanna concludes, and Jack shakes his head thoughtfully.

"Then make him think he didn't win."

TMNT

Luther cautiously walked over to the cell, a slight fear running down his spine. No, not fear, rational worry as he always preferred to call it. Nobody would feel safe between these walls, and with good reason too. He silently followed the guards into the hallway to the cell that held Mikey.

"Has he had any contact?" Luther finds himself asking, but the guard shakes his head.

"Not the last few days, word got out his parents were set to be executed today and they attacked him for it because some made assumptions about what he did." The guard said. "They weren't wrong though, but we had to separate him. He has spent the rest of the year with the rest in juvie"

Luther nods thoughtfully, but didn't say anything else as they continued their walk through the prison. They had to stop for a moment as a door electronically opened before they could continue. The guard slowed down, turning around.

"Open on 4" He called out. A buzzing sound was heard, and the prison door opened. Luther pushed down his nervousness, walking over to the cell. In the back of the cell was the figure of the boy, back turned to Luther and sitting on the ground. Luther frowned, watching at the paintings that were displayed.

The boy was staring at them, despite the fact that he must've heard them enter.

"Interesting paintings" Luther commented, but Mikey didn't react. There were two in front of him. Both as beautiful as the other. One of them was filled with a bouquet of roses, bright red roses accompanied by a beautiful and colourful background. The other one was outdoors, a girl shown running and laughing.

 _His little sister_.

"Not much else to do here" Mikey spoke in a low, and thoughtful voice. Luther nodded, watching as Mikey slowly got to his feet. "Why are you visiting?" He asks, but there was no judgement in his voice, just wariness.

His face was filled with fading bruises, and he couldn't completely hide the winds of pain that went through his body. His knuckles were bloodied, torn open.  _So he had fought back_. But the boy in front of him… he was no fighter. That much was evident.

"My colleagues and I are trying to find out more about the girls. Don't you think those mothers deserve to know why their girls were chosen?" At the mention Mikey flinches backwards, averting his eyes in shame for just a split second. And if Luther hadn't been looking, he wouldn't have seen it.

Mikey inhales sharply, turning back to Luther.

"What do you want to know?"

TMNT

"What was your relation with your parents?" Luther asks softly, leaning forwards so his elbows were situated on the table. Mikey was sitting on the other side, cuffs around his wrists but not actually bolted to the table.

"Distant" Mikey mutters. "They never loved me, and I never loved them"

"Did they look after you? Help you with homework or anything?" Luther asks and Mikey scoffs.

"They didn't want to be bother by those things, I learned that the hard way" He scowls, and Luther knew better than to ask him about it, but he still asked.

"They beat you?"

"I learned quickly" Mikey responds vaguely, turning his head away.

"And your relationship with your little sister?" Luther continues to ask, studying Mikey's face intensely.

"No, you don't get to ask about her" Mikey growls, voice low in his throat. Mikey was anything but threatening right now, he looked miserable and tired, but the anger was clear in his eyes. He was glaring at Luther with fury in his eyes. This was a topic that wasn't meant to be asked about.

Again, Luther didn't care at the moment.

"Did you care for her when your parents didn't?" Luther asks, and Mikey glares again.

"Stop it" He grinds out, and Luther could almost hear his teeth grinding on top of each other. But Luther didn't stop.

"Did you teach her to read? Were you angry when she wasn't allowed to go to school?"

"ENOUGH" Mikey yelled, slamming his hands on the table, Luther wasn't fazed.

"Did you comfort her?"

"Stop it" Mikey hisses, tears jumping into his eyes.

"Why is this upsetting you this much?" Luther challenges. He could see the anger, but also frustration, rolling off of Mikey's form. He knew it wasn't the best way to make friends, but the closure for those mothers.. for those fathers.. meant more to him than the anger that Mikey was feeling.

"Because I failed her!" Mikey screamed, slamming his hands on the table again and standing up suddenly. The chair clattered back, the room echoing at the collision. Luther winced slightly, but he didn't relent, staring up at Mikey with a calm expression. "I failed my little sister okay?! I failed her, I failed those girls… I-.. I failed them"

The voice turned to a whisper, and tears started to run down his face. Luther slowly stood up, walking over to the side of Mikey. He carefully put the chair up again.

"Why do you say that? Why do you think you failed those girls?" He asks softly, putting a careful hand on Mikey's shoulder. The latter flinches, but doesn't make a move to shrug off the hand. "Why didn't you say this in court?" He continues when Mikey didn't say anything.

Tears rolled down Mikey's face, and he slowly turned his face towards Luther.

"I knew mom and dad brought those girls into the basement" He whispers, Luther frowns slightly. "That makes me just as guilty as them"

TMNT

"He isn't a killer, I don't believe it" Luther said the moment he walked out of the room. Kurtzman frowns, nodding slightly.

"He confessed to killing his sister" He remarked, and Luther nods.

"And I'm also pretty sure he was the one behind the anonymous call. The library was close to his former home, and on the exact day he had skipped school. That shows he didn't want his parents knowing about the call" Luther countered. "That's not someone who would kill his sister"

"But that's not enough" Mikey's attorney remarked, and Luther glanced at him. "We need evidence, speculation isn't enough"

"Would proof that his parents killed his sister be enough?" Luther asks, hopefully.

The attorney just nods.

TMNT

"I'm sorry I shouted at you" Mikey murmurs softly. Luther just shook his head, lingering for a moment in the doorway.

"Don't be" Luther waved off, walking into the room. Mikey's eyes immediately landed on what he was carrying. "I took these paintings from your cell, I hope you don't mind." Luther tried, but Mikey's expression said it all.

"Those are private, you had no right" He whispers, almost as if he couldn't get his voice to come out right. Luther frowns slightly, gazing at the pictures.

"A bouquet, 12 roses. One for every girl right?" Luther asks, and Mikey's face fills with shock. "Twelve roses, not thirteen. Did you know they just found the thirteenth body?" Mikey's head whirls to Luther's face, but he didn't move, frozen.

"You didn't know, did you? But then again, you didn't really know about any of them" Luther concluded.  _Proving Mikey was innocent, proving that he wasn't a killer_. Mikey didn't react, face hardened at the statement.

Luther didn't back down. "Why did you lie about killing your little sister Mikey?"

"I didn't lie" Mikey immediately responded, voice clear.

"Where is the body then?" Luther countered, and Mikey's eyes darted down. Just for a few seconds, before he looked Luther straight in the eyes again.

"Do you have siblings?" He asks softly.

"I fail to see how that is relevant" Luther frowns, but Mikey shook his head.

"Younger right? You would do anything to protect him or her?" Mikey asks, and Luther leans forwards again.

"So you killed her to protect her from your parents?" Luther concluded, and Mikey leans back slightly.  _So that's a yes_. "Where is she buried?" Mikey shook his head again.

"That's doesn't matter. All that matters is that she's in a better place"

TMNT

"In a few hours you don't have to be afraid anymore" Luther said softly. Mikey turned around, facing the officer. Luther glanced around Mikey's cell again, eyes landing on the paintings. Mikey didn't say anything. Mikey didn't need a clarification, he knew what Luther was talking about.

The execution of his parents.

"The girl on the painting, she looks older than 6, right?" Luther starts, walking over to the painting. "Is that how you imagine her, or how she is?" Mikey glares at the man again, shaking his head.

"Let it go Luther" He whispered with a steady voice. "She's in a better place."

"Where is she?" Luther countered but Mikey shook his head slowly. "Where is she Mikey? Where is Amaya?" Luther continues, but Mikey shakes his head again.

"In a better place Luther. Let it go" Mikey whispered. And that's when Luther dared to believe his own train of thought.

 _In a better place_. Luther's eyes widened ever so slightly.  _In a better place_.

 _She was alive_.

He slowly backed out of the cell. "I will be right back" He called out, but he didn't give Mikey any time to react. He was out before he even finished the sentence. He put his finger to his ear, activating his earpiece.

"Renet I need you to search something for me" He called out, continuing to walk back to the common room his team used.

"Name it" Renet chirped on the other side of the line, fingers already clattering on the keyboard. Renet was the technical analyst, and the go to person for anything that was on the web somewhere.

"Amaya Feltner is alive, I need you to find her" He calls out, opening the door to the common room. Luckily the team was already there.

"Are you certain?" He could hear Renet ask from the other side. He knew his teammates had heard the conversation, so he made no move to explain it. But they were all looking at him with the same confusion on their faces, yet, no one questioned him.

"Yes, look at abandoned babies back in 2007 around Queens, people looking to adopt, anything" He told her.

"On it" Renet confirmed. Again, the keyboard was heard typing, and the usual humming of Renet as she worked. "Oh my… " She whispered, viciously continuing to type on the keyboard.

"Renet what is it? Speak to us" Jhanna speaks up.

"There was an abandoned child that day. A girl, approximately 7 years old." She states, and Luther can feel his blood run cold. Not because he was wrong, but because he was right. That had to be Amaya. "She wasn't in the system, and she didn't know where she lived before"

"Why didn't they make the connection between her and Mikey? Surely she must've mentioned his name" Jack asks.

"She didn't" Renet whispered. "The reports say that she mentioned her older brother, but she kept calling him Kiki"

"Short for Mikey" Luther muttered. "It was a nickname, and she never went to school so of course she would not know where she lived. And I doubt she even knew her parents' names"

"Where is the kid now?" Jack interjects. There was a short silence, and yet again, the keyboard was heard ticking.

"She got adopted by a family, a father and a mother, no other siblings. They moved out of New York City a year afterwards. Current location is…-" She pauses for a moment. "Dover, new Hampshire"

"We have agents there" Luther came into action, grabbing his phone. "A friend of mine, he can check"

"Renet what is the name of the girl now?" Rockwell asks. A short silence, a phone ringing, begging to be picked up.

"Cassandra Eastman. Parents are Peter and Zoe Eastman." Renet spoke. "Normal family, nothing out of the ordinary" She continued, but Luther had already zoned himself out. Jack glances at his young colleague, watching him intensely as the young man talked to the phone in his hand.

He could hear the voice on the other side of the phone, but he couldn't hear  _what_  he was saying.

"Renet we need the current address of the family" Luther suddenly spoke. There was a silence, before Renet spoke with a soft, yet, confident voice.

"7 Niles Street" Luther nods immediately, turning to the rest of the team as he spoke into the phone again.

"Slash, the address is 7 Niles Street" He says, an inaudible response from the other side. Luther looks up. "Slash and Pete are close by, they can get there in minutes" It was almost as if Luther was asking for permission, asking for advice. What should he do in this situation? Should he tell them to go?

"Tell them to go" Luther immediately put his attention back to the phone according, giving the orders to his friends. Jhanna frowns slightly, walking over to Jack with slow steps until she stopped next to him.

"Why didn't he tell?" She asks softly, and Jack looks at her.

"What do you mean?"

"His parents are dead, he doesn't have to protect her. They can't hurt her anymore" Jhanna speaks up, and Jack frowns as well, turning back to Luther as if he held the answers. But he didn't, neither of them did. They had no idea why Mikey had kept Amaya a secret in the first place, why he didn't tell about her in court.

Even when his parents were given the death penalty.. he didn't tell.

He opted to spend the rest of his life in prison. He'd rather be locked away forever than reveal that his sister was still alive, reveal to everyone that he was actually innocent. It would prove that he also had nothing to do with the kidnappings, the murders. It would set him free, and subsequently, reunite him with his sister.

Jhanna looks up at her boss but Jack's attention had been turned to the guard that had walked into the room. The guard directly walked over to the leader of their team. Jack bowed slightly so the guard could whisper in his ear, and Jack frowned slightly, gazing at Luther for a moment.

He straightened up again.

"Mikey is being moved away from this cell block, his parents have just been executed." He states with a low voice. The team stills, and Luther's eyes widened ever so slightly.

"Where is he?" He asks, already walking over to the door. "Take me to him" He orders the guard, who nods silently.

"Luther talk to me" Rockwell murmurs, walking besides his friend.

"Slash is almost at the house… I need to know if it's her." Luther mutters, continuing to follow the guard. He couldn't hear the rest of the team follow him, but he quickly figured they must've stayed behind.

They continued to walk, and after a few minutes the boy came into view. His wrists were shackled together, just a small chain between them.

"Stop" Luther called out, and the two guards walking besides Mikey obeyed, stopping and turning around to watch the other guard, and the two FBI agents approaching them. Mikey stared at Luther in shock, a look that said enough.  _He knew what was going on._

"Don't do this" He whispers, shaking his head. He took a step forwards.

" _There's no one home_ " Luther could hear Slash from the other side of the line.

"Keep trying" Luther spoke into the phone. Mikey's head whirled towards the phone.

"Please don't tell her" He pleaded again, and Luther quickly gave the phone to Rockwell and took a step forwards as well, looking at the boy with a slight smile.

"They're gone Mikey, your parents are gone. You don't have to fear them anymore" Mikey watched with a broken expression, tears welling up in his eyes. "You protected your sister Mikey, but you don't have to now" Luther states, continuously listening to any change on the other side of the line.

Mikey shook his head slightly "It was never about protecting her from them" He whispered softly. "I choose this… I choose to keep her a secret so she can be whatever she wants… free of me, and of my parents' reputation" He continues. Luther stilled ever so slightly at the explanation.

And suddenly everything seemed to click.

That's why Mikey wanted to keep his sister a secret, so she wouldn't know who her parents were. So she wouldn't be hurt by the knowledge that her parents kill and maimed children wilfully, and everyone knew who they were and what they did.

"What would she think Mikey? Think about it. Would she want to lose her big brother like that? If she knew who you were-"

"If she knew who I was… if she knew who her parents were… imagine how much damage that would do to her" Mikey countered softly.

"I can't let you do this Mikey" Luther insisted, shaking his head.

"They found the girl Luther, what do you want them to do?" Rockwell interrupted softly. Mikey's head whirled towards the figure in the back. Fear was clearly written on his face, but he was frozen in fear. There was a tense silence, and Mikey dared to drag his eyes towards Luther again.

"Don't do this, you can't ruin her life like that. Don't make her my parents' last victim" Mikey pleaded. Luther's expression changed, and a look of empathy crossed his face.

"Please"

"Luther what do they do?" Rockwell asks again, but Luther completely ignores his friend. He tuned out everyone in the room except Mikey. A sense of quiet… a sort of peace washed over Luther as he watched Mikey, and the boy stared right back at him, not seeing anyone else either.

Mikey's blue eyes, muddled by fear, haunted by trauma, were watching him. Bags were under his eyes, bruises littered his exposed skin. He looked horrible, and he was willing to spend the rest of his life in prison for her. Luther stares at Mikey's broken figure, someone who had already given up on life.

He was at peace here… knowing that his sister was safe.

Luther takes a few steps forwards, until he could reach out and out his hands on Mikey's shoulders. Mikey took a shuddering breath, relief filling his body.  _He wasn't goi-_

"It's his sister, get them-"

"NO!" Mikey screamed, charging forwards. "NO! She can't know! You'll ruin her life!" A blow landed on Luther's head, but he ignored it. He simply deflected it, staying as calm as he could. Guards charged in as well, grabbing his arms and pulling him back.

"NO LET ME GO!" Mikey screamed, tears streaming down his face. "You ruined her life! How could you?!"

Luther turned his head down, turning around to face his teammate, who was staring at Mikey's form in awe and shock.

"I hate you! You ruined her life, I hate you!" Mikey seethed, a sob tearing from his throat before they dragged him into a room, and the screaming ended. Luther swallowed painfully, and the image of the boy screaming and crying would never leave his memory. He has sacrificed so much, and Luther just ruined everything.

_For Mikey's freedom, so he could be free._

Luther sniffles, turning to Jack. He had no idea when the rest of the team arrived, but now he was glad they did. He highly doubted he could explain what just happened without a mental breakdown.

"I told you he was innocent" He croaks, glancing at Rockwell. "Slash will send you the proof we need to free him"

And then he left as well.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welp there it is, the full story. There are still some small details that aren't told yet, but I will address those in the next chapter. I prefer Mikey talking about those, and it would've been too much to put it in this chapter as well. But tell me if you have any questions about why how when with whom… anything right now. So I know if I actually have to explain something xD Cause I often forgot to explain plot points as I know what they mean etc.  
> I will still explain the name for example, and how Mikey dropped off his sister etc.
> 
> The city his sister moved to is the city where the first TMNT comic was published. Just a little easteregg :)
> 
> Thank you so much, and again, 10 reviews for an extra chapter! *hug*


	10. Chapter 10

Leo's POV

"When Luther told her parents that I was Cassie's brother. _.._ I was taken back to my cell, and they reopened the court." Mikey mutters. "Retried my case"

"And they set you free" Don filled in, and Mikey nods painfully. "Mikey.. I don't even know what to say" He continues, and I could feel my heart squeeze painfully at the thought. Mikey allowed himself to suffer that whole year so he could protect his youngest sister, he gave up everything.

And Luther ruined everything. Of course he would be mad at the FBI agent, even if he was just doing his job.

"But does that mean your little sister already knows about you?" I ask softly, glancing at the tears streaking down Mikey's face. The blond looks at me for a few seconds before shaking his. He pulled his knees to his chest, wrapping his arms around his knees. He took a shuddering breath, shaking his head again.

"No… no she doesn't" He says, voice surprisingly clear, but the tears were still all too evident. "Her parents dropped her off at her grandparents before they went to the station"

"And the police? What did they do when they found out she was your sister?" Don questions. Mikey doesn't visibly react, eyes glued to the floor.

"The parents didn't do anything illegal, so they had no reason to take her away. After they were cleared, they visited me." Mikey takes a deep breath, lifting his head up. "They asked about my side of the story, why I dropped her off in the first place, why I didn't go with her, and if I was okay with all of  _this_."

I glance to the side for a moment, but we all understood what Mikey was referring to with  _this_. If he was okay with the parents caring for his little sister. And we all understood that Mikey was perfectly okay with it. If he hadn't been, he would've done something the moment he was released.

This is what he wanted, a normal life for his little sister.

"Why didn't ya go with her?" Raph asks softly. Mikey glances at him, another tear streaking down his cheek.

"Because I was too old. I knew the outside world, people knew me from school, and they would link me to my parents. They would link her to them as well, and I didn't want that." Mikey explains, voice barely above a whisper.

It made sense, in Mikey's own messed up way. His sister had never been outside, probably didn't know where she lived, what her parents were called, and barely knew Mikey's name. She wouldn't figure out where she came from. Mikey, on the other hand, would. He was old enough, people knew him from school. And going with his sister meant that his sister would still know who her parents were.

"So when your parents said you had to kill her, you dropped her off at the police station instead?" I ask, and I can't get myself to speak loudly or clearly at the moment. The tension was too much almost, as if it could even be cut with a dull knife. And I didn't want to be the one to do so.

I didn't want to be the one to scare Mikey off, not now he was finally telling everything.

"They said I had to drop her off in the nearby forest, so I didn't have long. I had already packed a bag, and I waited until Amaya was asleep before putting on her jacket and leaving the house. She wa- is a deep sleeper so she didn't wake up, and she barely weighted anything because we weren't fed much" Mikey explained.

My breath hitched slightly, and I had to do everything to keep myself from walking over to him, hug him and tell him everything would be alright. Again, I was too selfish to comfort him. I wanted to hear the story, I needed to hear the story right now.

"I didn't see many people, but no one stopped me, or was suspicious. I put on gloves, a hat, and wrapped her up in a thick blanket" He stops for a moment, wiping at his eyes. "I knew I had to.. but I just couldn't leave her like that y'know? She was my little sister" Mikey murmured, fresh tears rolling down his cheeks.

It was Raph who cracked first, slowly standing up and walking over to our youngest brother. Mikey didn't recoil at all, he didn't react badly. No, completely the opposite. He immediately leaned into Raph's embrace, bursting out in tears. Raph wrapped his arms around Mikey tightly.

Don creeped towards me, and I wrapped a comforting arm around him as well.

"What happened then Mike?" Raph whispers softly when Mikey's cries died down just a little. The latter sniffles, revealing his face again. There was a look of regret but also embarrassment on his face. He wipes, or tries to, wipe away the tears on his face.

"I wrote a note to the ones who would find her. 'I'm sorry, I had to. She deserves better than the life I could give her. Look after Cassandra for me'. I couldn't get myself to write more, too afraid to get caught, and too afraid that the longer I waited… the harder it would be leaving her"

He sniffles again, but made no move to wipe away the tears that were now endlessly cascading down his cheeks.

"Why the name Cassandra?" Don questions softly, and Mikey looks at his immediate older brother.

"A classmate of mine had these comics he would let me read in the breaks." Mikey explains. "Cassandra Cain was one of my favourite heroes. I just needed a quick name so I could find out where she ended up if I ever wanted to know. And Amaya would tie her to our family."

"But they knew there was a younger sister when they arrested you almost 2 years ago, which is why you told the cops you killed her"

"It was what my parents thought as well, if I would've denied it, they'd know something was wrong. I couldn't risk them spilling their doubts to the cops" Mikey muttered in a low voice. Raph nudged him ever so slightly, but Mikey didn't react to the physical contact.

"What happened after you dropped of Cassandra?" Don asks.

"I left her at the station, and called them from a payphone. I waited until someone brought her inside, so I knew she was in good hands, before I left." Mikey explained, voice filled with regret. "When I got back to the house I knew I couldn't just walk in.. So I cut my own leg to get my hands bloody"

I can feel my heart plummet at the sudden explanation.  _So that's where the scar on his leg came from_.

_Oh god, my little brother had cut himself to protect his little sister from being discovered._

"I told my parents I had slit her throat, and buried her in the forest." Mikey finished slowly, an embarrassed look on his face.

"But why did they take you with them, and not your sister?" Don asks with a slight frown on his face.

"She was a girl, she wasn't worth anything to my dad." Mikey scowled. "They kept her around because it was more trouble to get rid of her when the police weren't aware of us"

"But when the police discovered your parents' operation it was better to get rid of her" Don fills in, and Mikey nods.

"I don't know, maybe dad wanted me to follow in his footsteps or something like that. Not like I ever would" Mikey mutters, loosening the hold he had on his knees. "We spent the next 5 years on the run, travelling from place to place. No matter how much I despised my parents… I would rather be free than be in prison"

I lower my gaze slightly, staring at the floor at the clenching feeling that attacked my heart.  _He would rather be free than be in prison_. Of course he would, of course he'd rather be free. Of course he'd rather not be in prison or juvie. That's why he didn't turn himself in, or betray his parents.

Not out of love for them, but purely out of self-preservation.

The only thing that mattered was that his little sister was safe.

"And the police probably thought we had taken Amaya with us, they had no idea she had died. When we were caught, I had to confess to avoid them looking for her. If she was dead, they would have no reason to look for her" Mikey whispers, fully leaning into Raph's side after the sentence.

We were all silent for a moment, soaking up all the information we had been given. So this was the secret mom and dad had kept from us all those months, this was the secret Mikey didn't want us knowing. And it only caused another big question, one I was too afraid to ask almost.

_Why didn't he want us knowing that his sister was alive?_

But I guess I also knew the answer to that one. It was because he didn't want to see her, he didn't want to see Amaya, or rather, Cassandra right now. And telling us meant that we knew about her, that we knew about what he had done to protect her. But most importantly, that she was still alive.

He didn't tell because he knew we would encourage him to see her.

"Was Luther talking about your sister?" Don asks. I glance at him, frowning slightly. I had almost forgotten, Luther's conversation with Mikey a few days back. And come to think of it, I still didn't understand what either of them had been talking about, but right now I could make an educated guess about whom they were talking.

" _I merely wanted to tell Mikey something"_  Luther had said. And Mikey had responded with " _I already know"._ But the question was, what did he know? I mean, it was probably about his sister, since Luther was the one to tell her parents who Mikey really was.

"He was" Mikey confirms, taking a deep breath. "When I was on the run, and in these last few months I've been keeping tabs on Cass, whenever I could. Just to make sure she was safe, and that she was happy. I don't know much about her, but I know she's safe. And two weeks ago, she moved back to New York"

"You mean she lives close by?" I question, and Mikey nods.

"She lives in Belmont, the Bronx." Mikey says, and I frown ever so slightly. Belmont, that was so close to our town, barely a 20 minute drive.

"Luther came by because he knew too, and he wanted to convince you to visit her"

"But I already knew that she moved, and I wasn't planning on visiting her" Mikey finished. "And I had no desire to see him either" He mutters tiredly.

"When  _are_ you going to see her?" I ask softly, and Mikey glances towards me with tear streaking down his face. He looked so small, miserable almost.

"Never" His voice was hoarse, but his tone was determined. "I don't want to see her, not if it means telling her"

"I think you do" I counter softly, and Mikey frowns in shock.

"I don't" He whispers, almost too soft for me to hear it.

"You didn't tell us because you knew we would encourage you to see her" I explain, ignoring the glances from Raph and Don. "But you told us, because you want us to. Because you actually want to see her"

"Maybe I just told you because I didn't want secrets between us" Mikey counters, but there's absolutely no bite in his voice, no matter how hard he tries to.

"I know you better than that Mikey, I know you want to see her."

"Always" Mikey countered in a whisper, a single tear streaming down her face. "But I can't Leo… I can't hurt her like that"

"What is she wants ya to?" Raph suddenly cuts in, voice just as soft and gentle. "What is he would want to know ya, what if she feels like that's worth the pain?" He continues, and I nod slightly.

Mikey shakes his head desperately. "No.. guys I can't. Not to her, she doesn't deserve that." He mumbles. "She had the perfect life, great parents, friends, she's talented… I can't ruin that"

"Not perfect" Don shakes his head. "You're not in it" Mikey frowns, staring at Don.

"But she doesn't know me, she can't miss me" The blond counters. This time Don carefully stands up. It was as if he was approaching a wild animal, testing Mikey's reaction to the movement. Mikey didn't object, didn't show any signs of being scared. Don eventually relented, walking over to him.

Don sank to his knees, looking at Mikey, before glancing at the ground.

"I know it may seem like it. I have that perfect live as well" I can feel my breath hitch ever so slightly. Because I understood what he was trying to say. "I have perfect parents, I have 2 older brothers, and an amazing little one"

Mikey laughs at that, but the smile is still sad, and tears are still lingering in his eyes. Don smiled fondly for a moment, taking a deep breath.

"I'm a nerd, but I have so many friends. I don't get bullied, I don't get shoved around for loving to learn new things, or for getting good grades. A perfect life, right?" Don asks, and Mikey nods. "But I don't know my parents Mikey, no matter how good my life is, there will always be an empty spot because I don't know them"

"What if your parents are as bad as mine? Would you rather know that your parents tortured and killed all those girls instead of not knowing?" Mikey bit back, but his voice was too soft, I could see he was tired. Not physically, but emotionally.

"I don't know Mikey, I honestly don't know" Don admits honestly. "But I do know that I want to know my parents right now. I want to know where I'm from, and why I was abandoned"

There's a short silence, and Don takes a deep breath. "Take it from someone who has been abandoned by his parents, knowing your parents is something important. I want to know them, meet them, no matter who they are. And I'm sure your little sister feels the same"

"I know ma parents Mike, but I never got ta know them. Even if they were assholes like yours." Raph adds. "I would want nothing ta do with them, but I still wonder why they did what they did, or what I inherited from them" Mikey glances at Raph with a frown on his face, close to crying again.

He sniffles, wiping his tears away.

"But what if she hates me?" Mikey whispers softly, whirling around to look at Don. "You said you'd still hate your mom, even if she had a good reason. I can't…. I can't handle if she hates me"

"I said I wouldn't know how to react" Don defends himself. "I said it would depend on the reason they left me. If she did it for the same reason you left your sister… I would only be mad at you for leaving me alone for that long. I would only be mad at you for sacrificing your life like that"

"She could never hate you Mikey, not when you did all this because you love her so much" I nod, and Mikey glances at me, a wary expression on his face.

"Do you really think that?" Mikey asks softly, and I nod again. I stand up slowly, walking over to him, and sitting down in front of him.

"I could never know, and neither can you, before you meet her." I tell him honestly, because even if I wanted Mikey to meet his little sister, I could never lie to him, give him false hope. "But I know I could never hate any of you if you did something to protect me."

Mikey glances down, avoiding our gazes. Then, slowly he lifts his head again, fresh tears again streaming down his face.

"Okay" He eventually relents. "I will see her"

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So just to clarify because even I get confused sometimes xD
> 
> Mikey and Cass/Amaya were born in Queens, Mikey dropped off Amaya in Queens and Mikey fled with his parents. Cassandra was adopted by a family in Queens, but they quickly moved to New Hampshire, Dover. (To give Cass a fresh start and all).
> 
> Mikey moved all over the area, but was eventually caught by the police, taken back to New York, and sentenced to prison. He got out, got fostered by the Hamato's, who live in New Rochelle. (So Mikey in New Rochelle, just 30 minutes above NYC, and Cassandra in New Hampshire)
> 
> And now Cassandra moves back to New York, to the bronx, which is like the top of New York City, for the ones who didn't know (Cause I sure as hell didn't :D I barely know where New York is, let alone where all the subthingies like Queens, Bronx and Manhattan are)
> 
> So for the ones wondering, the episode this is based on is Criminal minds, season 1 episode 14, Riding the Lightning. Now I fully explained everything I can finally tell :D


	11. Chapter 11

(Don’s POV) 

“Remind me again why we’re here?” Leo asks, glancing at his youngest brother with a frown on his face. Mikey frowns, glancing back at Leo with a complicated look on his face. It was a look that was often displayed, even more so in the last 2 months. 

2 months… it has already been 2 months since Mikey had told us everything, that he had suffered all this time to protect his little sister. 

“Fearless is right, why the hell are we standing here like a bunch of creeps?” Raph mutters. “Only thing we need is a white van and some candy” Raph’s bright eyes roam over the playground, observing the children walking out of the school building. A middle school of Bronx to be precise. 

And Mikey had insisted that we go here for some reason, he wanted to show  _ us _ something. It was almost the end of August, and it was still pleasantly warm outside. 

Our little brother tenses slightly all of a sudden, breath caught in his throat as he stands up straighter, gaze fully focused on the building now, or rather, the entrance. 

“Over there” He whispers after a few seconds, gesturing to the entrance. We all glance at it, but the only thing we saw were a few girls walking outside, girls who couldn’t be older than 12 or 13. 

“What are we looking at?” I found myself asking softly, and Mikey glances at me for just a short moment. 

“Not what” He mutters, glancing back at the girls again. One of the girls laughed, probably at a joke one of the other girls had told. Then, the girl waved, leaving her friends behind and walk away to the parking lot. Mikey followed her with his bright blue eyes, looking at her while she eventually met up with a couple standing there. 

The parents smiled, hugging the child tightly for a short moment. I frown, tilting my head slightly. Because I  _ knew _ that man, I knew that woman. Those were the parents who- 

My eyes widened, and I snapped my head towards my only younger brother. “Mikey… are those..?” I stutter, and Mikey nods painfully, tears stinging in his eyes as he looks the parents hug, what must be, his younger sister. 

“Is that Cassandra?” Leo whispers softly, but he didn’t need Mikey’s confirmation to know it was true, he had already figured it out. I look again, taking in every feature I could see from such a distance. Her curly brown hair, reaching just below her shoulder blades, just like Mikey’s curls but longer. 

Her bright blue eyes, just like Mikey’s, and a smile that was so alike to his. 

“She started school here last week, and I just… I had to see her. I couldn’t  _ not  _ see her when she’s so close.” Mikey tries to explain, taking a shuddering breath. 

“I understand Mikey” I whisper softly, walking up to him with soft steps. “She’s your little sister, and you haven’t seen her in years” That seemed to be the lasts straw. Mikey burst into tears, turning towards me. My eyes soften, and I immediately wrap my arms around him, forcing him closer to me. 

Neither of us say anything, silent as Mikey sobbed against me. His whole form shook, and I could do nothing but hold him tight. Mikey’s face pressed into my collarbone, so wrong and so right at the same time. I was glad Mikey trusted me enough, but I was sad that he was going through all of this. 

I glance at Leo and Raph, still holding Mikey against me. They were both looking at us with a sad expression, but they made no move. Mikey was trusting me enough to hold him, but even after 8 months we had no idea what to expect exactly. Sometimes he would react well to so much attention. 

Other times he wouldn’t. 

“Let’s go home” Leo eventually whispered softly, putting a gentle hand on Mikey’s shoulder. The latter startles slightly, but quickly nods, wiping away the tears still lingering in his eyes before following Leo. 

_ Home _ . 

TMNT

Days went by as if they were nothing, days, weeks, months. 

Despite what Mikey had said, he never visited Cassandra, he never brought it up, and whenever we did, he shot us down. Despite what he said, he still didn’t want to visit his little sister. Fear of hurting her, fear of ruining her entire life, and not thinking about his own gains, what he wanted. 

I sigh, rubbing my forehead. Leo was with some friendsi right now, and Mikey had gone with dad to do the groceries. 

“Don!” I suddenly hear Raph shout. I whirl my head around, eyes widening at the sight. 

“Already?” I ask, and Raph smirks. 

“Of course” Raph adds. “Now come help me” I roll my eyes, but I stand up nevertheless, walking over to Raph to help him with the Christmas tree.  _ 15 days before Christmas _ . We silently worked the tree into the living room, setting it down next to the desk. 

“Can’t believe it’s almost been a year” I mutter suddenly, taking a few steps back to look at the tree. Almost Christmas, it was almost Christmas already. It had been January when Mikey came to us, 11 months it had been, and he had already come so far in those months with us. 

But he still hadn’t come to visit Cassandra. 

“Still no change with Cassandra?” Raph asks in a low voice, but I knew that Raph already knew that answer as well. If Mikey had suddenly changed his mind, he would’ve let us know, we would surely know by now. 

I shake my head nevertheless, sitting down with an audible thud. 

“Maybe we should just tell her family.” Raph suggest softly, sitting down as well. I frown, nose scrunching up ever so slightly, lifting my head to look at my immediate older brother. 

“We can’t Raph, we can’t betray his trust like that.” I whisper, shaking my head. Raph lets out a soft sigh, rubbing his hands together anxiously. 

“I know Don.. I know that” He lets his head tip back, staring at the ceiling above him. I sigh as well, a shuddering breath leaving my throat. How had we let this go on for so long? Why had we let this go on for so long? It had been four months now since Mikey had told us everything about his past. 

And we had let him make excuses for 4 months now, we had let him get away with  _ not _ seeing her for so long. 

He had visited her school once or twice more, but he tried to leave her alone as much as possible. He wanted to keep his distance, to avoid getting attached to her, because he knew … he knew he wouldn’t be able to let her go once he got to know her  _ again _ . 

So he never did. 

TMNT

They walked, surrounded by misery, surrounded by bars separating them from the criminals. Her hand grabbed her husband’s hand, squeezing it softly. The man glances at her, giving her a reassuring smile. They continued to follow the guard, stopping for a short moment when the guard did as well. 

Then, the guard ordered the door to be opened, and he stepped aside to allow the couple to walk through. 

They, albeit hesitantly, did so, stepping into the room as quietly as they could, a guard following them in. The room didn’t necessarily smell, but it wasn’t a pleasant smell either. And it wasn’t  _ just _ the smell, it was also the feeling the room gave them, causing a shudder to run down the woman’s back. 

In the middle of the room, which was illuminated by one small window, was a table. Three chairs in total surrounding the table, one on one side, the last two on the other side. There was a handrail attached to the table, and two cuffs were attached to it, keeping the person attached on the same place. 

The couple walked over to the table, sitting down on the two free chairs. 

“Are you…. you are our daughter's brother, aren’t you?” The woman asked softly. The boy’s head shot up suddenly, and realisation dawned down on him. 

“You can’t tell her” He whispered, but the demand was clear. The woman frowned slightly, cocking her head. 

The boy had blond hair, and bright blue eyes. Blue eyes that had become so familiar to them over the past years. Blue eyes that their daughter had as well. The blond hair wasn’t something they shared, but the curls were, and so were the freckles that dotted his cheeks and bridge of the nose. 

Although they were barely noticeable right now on his dirty, and tear stained face. 

He looked exhausted, haunted.  _ This was their daughter’s brother? _

“Why can’t we?” The woman asks, but the boy shook his head furiously. 

“Please.. please just… you can’t tell her, you can’t do that to her, please” The boy pleaded, tears returning to his eyes. The man reached out for his wife, putting a gentle hand on hers. 

“How about we start at the beginning?” He asks softly. Mikey’s attention snaps to him, but he slowly relaxes slightly, slumping in his seat before nodding. “My name’s Peter Eastman, this is my wife Zoe. We are… Cassandra is our daughter” He spoke, his voice confident yet soft. 

“Adoptive daughter” The woman spoke, Zoe spoke. “We adopted her when she was found abandoned at just 7 years old. We never found out who her family was” The last part was added almost reluctantly, as if she was afraid to say the wrong thing to the boy in front of her, to scare him off, or to cause him to close up. 

“I’m Mikey Feltner… and Cassandra is my little sister” The boy, Mikey, spoke softly, a tear running down his cheek, and soon followed by another. 

“Why did you give her up?” The father spoke, leaning forwards slightly. 

Mikey took a shuddering breath, waiting for a few seconds. “How much do you know about my family?” He asks, and Peter frowns for a moment. 

“We know what your parents did” The mother, Zoe, said. Mikey glances at her, eyeing her almost warily before dropping his gaze again. 

“Then you know why I did”  _ To protect her from our parents, to protect her from the damage it would cause her _ . 

“I don’t understand” A frown appeared on Zoe’s face, and she looks at her husband for an explanation, but he seemed just as confused as his wife was. “What does that mean Mikey?” She asks, glancing at him. 

“They wanted me to kill her when we were going to flee, but I couldn’t… I could never” Mikey mumbled, shaking his head again. “I-... I dropped her off, called to make sure she would be okay, I dropped her off so she could have a better life, you have to believe me” 

“Easy Mikey” The man said, trying to calm the teenager down. Mikey nodded hastily. “Why didn’t you go with her?” 

Mikey was quiet for a moment.  _ Why didn’t he go with her? Why had he doomed himself for life instead of going? _ He closes his eyes for a second.  _ Because they would recognise me, I didn’t go so she could be free of our family, so she wouldn’t know what her parents did, and have normal parents _ . 

_ I didn’t go because they would know who I was _ . 

He told them everything, everything the parents wanted to know about their daughter. Answers that could’ve never been answered before, answered they had always been desperate to know, answers their daughter had always been desperate to know, but never could. 

“I am so sorry for what happened to you Mikey” The woman spoke, voice almost inaudible through her tears. This boy had sacrificed everything so his sister could have a better life. 

“Just.. just don’t tell her, it would ruin her life” Mikey ignored the woman’s apology. 

“She would want to know” The mother tried to reason with him, but Mikey shook his head. 

“It would ruin her life, please, you have to promise me you won’t tell, please” They could both see how desperate the boy was, his form shaking, and tears streaming down his face. But his eyes, dull blue eyes desperate with convincing the parents in front of him. 

“You deserve to have one as well” Zoe countered.  _ A life, he deserved a life as well. He had given Cass one, and for that he deserved one himself _ . 

“I am happy knowing she’s happy, please” Mikey tried to argue, and the woman bit her lip in doubt, glancing at her husband. The latter sighs softly. 

“Will this get you out of here?” He asks eventually, and Mikey frowns. “Will knowing Cassie is alive set you free? Will that be enough to get you out of prison?” He tries to clear up his confusion. A thoughtful look crosses Zoe’s face, and she clearly understood where her husband was getting at. 

A compromise. 

“I don’t know, I haven’t thought about that. I just… that doesn’t matter, I need to know that you won’t tell her” He insisted again, and it was clear that he wasn’t giving up. 

“I’m not happy about it, but I know why you wouldn’t want her knowing” Zoe whispered,  _ he had just explained it after all, it would ‘ruin’ her life in his eyes _ . 

“If they release you from prison because of this we won’t tell her, and you can tell when you’re ready.” The man explained, his gaze firm. 

“And if they don’t?” Mikey asks sceptically, not breaking eye contact with the parents. The ones that raised his baby sister for all these years now. But not the parents he had picked to raise his baby sister. 

“If they don’t release you, we will find a way to get you out” 

“Which includes telling my sister” Mikey concludes softly, glancing away. The mom nods, despite Mikey not being able to see it. 

“If she would find out we did nothing to get you out.. she would never forgive us” Zoe spoke softly, and Mikey dared to look at her again. “And I wouldn’t be able to live with myself either” 

TMNT

_ Two weeks later _

“She’s home right now, or she can come he-” 

“A deal is a deal Mrs. Eastman.” Mikey cut her off, sending a glare her way. Zoe sighs, nodding. 

“I know.” She admitted, standing up and walking over to the window. The court had decided on Mikey sentence, and with the new evidence that his sister was still alive, they had no reason to keep him locked up. There was still the debate if he had any play in the murder of the other girls. 

But they quickly decided that that wasn’t the case, if a boy was willing to give up his life for his sister, to give her a better life, there was no way the boy could willingly go along with those murders. 

And they ordered him to be released. 

Not immediately though, it would take a few days, maybe a week, to finalise everything. They would have to get the right papers, and also find a suitable home for him since he didn’t have any family left that could take care of him, and he wouldn’t accept the help of the parents. 

Not like they had any desire to take in Mikey, as much as they cared about him. 

But a worker has already been assigned to Mikey’s case, a good one who has matched numerous boys with long lasting homes in the past. So the parents knew that Mikey would be in good hands. 

“At least accept the number, if you ever change your mind you can contact us.” Mikey glances at the paper in Zoe’s hand, before he reluctantly accepts it. A phone number was written on it, the phone number of his sister’s parents. He folded up the paper, putting it away safely. 

_ Not like he would ever use it _ . 

The woman smiled sadly at his acceptance. Her eyes scanned the boy, a boy that has changed so much, yet so little, in the past 2 weeks. She frowned slightly, the most significant difference being his physical state right now. 

Isolation, that’s where they were right now. It sounded worse than it was, it was a private room for Mikey, until he was released. 

The other prisoners didn’t like that Mikey was getting out when they weren’t. Isolation wasn’t because he misbehaved, it was to protect him from the jealous prisoners. Zoe’s eyes went back to his face, seeing the bruises on full display. His bruised knuckles as he tried to defend himself, but his actions were futile. 

It was one more reason to get the boy out of that prison, he didn’t belong there. 

He was too kind, too caring for a prison. And Zoe was surprised he lasted that long. 

“We are flying back to New Hampshire first thing tomorrow.” Zoe told Mikey, who nodded blankly. “We’re both glad that you’re being released, you don’t deserve that” She says, and Mikey nods again but doesn’t say anything. Zoe sighs, looking down before taking a few steps forwards. 

Mikey’s muscle tense, but he doesn’t move. “Contact us whenever you’re ready, our daughter deserves to know her big brother.” She says with a kind smile. “For now, hang in there. You’re getting out very soon, and you’ll be taken in by a nice family, you’ll see.” Despite her good intentions, Mikey can’t help but scowl. 

_ As if anyone would foster me _ .

TMNT

_ Present day, Donnie’s POV _

“Guys?” Mikey’s voice came through the living room, voice shaky and trembling. I immediately look up at my only little brother with worried eyes. Leo was immediately up, and Raph was nowhere in sight right now. 

“What’s wrong Mikey?” Leo asks, walking up to Mikey. It was then that I noticed what Mikey was holding in his trembling hand, his phone. Tears were cascading down his face, and he made no move to wipe them away. Leo carefully put his hand on Mikey’s free one, squeezing softly. 

The trembling didn’t seize, but Mikey immediately snapped his gaze towards Leo. 

“Cassie” He whispered. My eyes widen a bit more, Cassie, Cassandra, his younger sister. 

“What happened to her?” Leo asks, obviously worried, but Mikey shook his head. Because it wasn’t sadness, it wasn’t why he was crying right now, it wasn’t why he was shaking. He was nervous, anxious, scared maybe. That’s why he was trembling, but those tears weren’t solemnly for those three emotions. 

There were tears of excitement, happiness, as well. 

“I called them, her parents.” Mikey whispers, glancing at me for a moment before glancing at Leo again. “I asked if I could meet her” 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For real this time guys, I promise! xD


	12. Chapter 12

“I’m really nervous” I whisper softly, not taking my eyes off the road in front of me, ignoring the look I know I was getting from my brother.  From the corner of my eyes I could still see Leo move slightly on the spot, but he too kept his eyes on the road. 

“I get that” He murmurs thoughtfully, and slowly I do look at him. For a moment, he glances at me as well, but he quickly focuses on the road in front of him. I sigh, leaning back against my seat. My form was trembling ever so slightly from the nerves, no matter how much I tried to calm myself down. 

I was going to see Cassie today.. I was going to  _ meet  _ her. 

And it terrified me. 

“Do you think she remembers me?” I ask softly, and the car is silent for a moment. Don and Raph weren’t with us today, they wanted to go, but I didn’t. I didn’t want three other siblings around me, when I met my only younger sibling, my biological sibling that is. Leo just felt… he felt right. 

Maybe it was because his own mom left him, but then again, Don’s parents had done so too. I had no clue, but I wanted Leo to go with me today. 

“I don’t know, I guess so” Leo murmurs. “I mean, she was 6 when you dropped her off right?”

“And five months” I correct him with a shrug. 

“She’s young, but not too young to forget everything. I don’t know much from when I was 6, but I remember some things” Leo explains, and I nod absently. Because he had a valid point, I could do too. She was 3 when I was 6 years old. I remember watching her when my parents were away in the weekends. 

I remember playing with her, acting as a human pillow when she got tired. I remember taking care of her.. as much as I could that is. But I don’t remember much, I can barely recall her face when she was three years old, I can barely recall what my classmates looked like. The only thing about them I can remember was how they looked when they were older. 

I barely remembered anything from the age of 6, but I did remember something. 

And maybe, just maybe, that would be enough for Cassie. 

“They gave her the wrong age when she got adopted, did you know that?” I ask suddenly, and I can see Leo glance at me for a quick second. But he doesn’t lose his focus.

“What do you mean?” Leo asks, confusion written on his face. 

“She was born in June, June 23th, 2001 to be precise” I tell him, shifting slightly in my seat as Leo passed another car. Just 10 minutes to go to  _ The Bronx _ . “When they found her, they had no idea how old she was, so they estimated she was 7” 

“But she was younger” Leo concluded, because he knew this already. 6 years, and 5 months I had just told him. 

“They made her birthday according to that estimate. December 15th, 2000.” I told him, two days ago, she turned 14 two days ago according to that wrong date. 

“But she’s really just 13 and a half?” Leo asks, and I hum to confirm his thoughts. 6 months between June and December exactly. “I mean, it doesn’t really matter for her class” Leo adds, and I frown slightly. 

“Why?” 

“Well she’s born in the summer, which means she would still be put in the same class” 

“But she would be the youngest instead” I conclude with a whisper, and this time it’s Leo who nods. It made sense. Right now she had just turned 14, so she was in the 8th grade. But if she were to be born half a year later, or rather, if they had known she was really born half a year later, she would still be in the 8th grade. 

So really, in terms of years, and her friends, it didn’t really matter. 

I lean back in the seat again, gazing at the cars that passed us, and the cars we passed. Leo continued to drive, following the navigation system. The address I had received from Cassie’s parents, following right to her house. 

“We’re here” Leo announces softly, but I don’t react to him. I already knew that, I recognised the house from google maps, I recognised the street. Leo quickly parked the car close by, and we both got out. She lived across the Botanical Garden, so despite living in New York City, it wasn’t too crowded. 

Leo put a gentle hand on my shoulder, squeezing softly. I smile, nodding with a slight tremble before making my way to the door. She lived in an apartment, three stories up. We rang the bell, and the door was quickly opened. Leo and I were both silent as we made our way into the building, into the elevator. 

“It will be alright Mikey, you’ll see” He spoke softly, giving me a quick hug. I nod shakily, not trusting my voice enough right now. We soundlessly exited the elevator, and I could see the door already being open, Cassandra’s mom standing in the opening. She smiled kindly. 

“Hello Mrs. Eastman” Leo greeted politely, shaking her hand. She laughed. 

“Please just call me Zoe” She said before turning to me, scanning me for a moment. “It’s really good to see you again Mikey, you look a lot better” 

“I feel a lot better” I admit honestly, glancing at Leo for a quick second. “Leo is my oldest brother, his parents fostered me.” 

“Our parents” Leo reminded me, and I can’t help but roll my eyes. It was an argument we often had, but one I would probably never win. For them it didn’t matter whether I was adopted or not. I was family, I was their little brother, their baby brother, and their parents were my parents as well. 

“You have more brothers?” 

“2 adoptive brothers. Raph is my immediate younger brother, and Donnie my second youngest” Leo explains. “Mikey’s the baby of the family” He jokes, nudging me with a grin. I can’t help but smile as well. I knew I was, but it was always nice to hear any of them say it out loud. 

“That’s lovely” Zoe smiled, stepping aside. “Come in, my husband is already in the living room” We follow her orders, stepping inside and following her to the living room. As predicted, Peter was in the living room already. 

“Mikey, welcome” Peter greeted me, shaking my hand. I nod curtly. “And this is?” He asks, but Leo steps forwards instead. 

“Leonardo, I’m Mikey’s oldest brother” He introduces himself. The man smiles at the information, and I’m sure he was just happy that I found a family. I glance at Leo for a moment, and the tiniest smile creeps onto my face.  _ I do too _ . 

“Have a seat please, I will get Cassie” Zoe says with a smile on her face. It wasn’t just a happy smile, it was an excited smile, yet, an anxious one. Their daughter was meeting her brother after all.  _ I  _ was meeting my sister. 

Leo and I both sat down on the couch, a silence falling over the room. Not an awkward one, but a tense one. I knew Leo and Peter were also anxious for Cassie’s reaction, but I paid no attention to them. 

“... -meone who wants to meet you” I could hear Zoe say, and two pair of footsteps continuously closer. 

“Mom, you’re acting weird” A female voice said, and I could feel my breath hitch. Then, Zoe and Cassie walked into the living room. Zoe walked over to her husband, but Cassie stopped the moment she saw Leo and I sitting there. Her nose scrunched up slightly in confusion, and I felt myself standing up slowly. 

A look of confusion on Cassie’s face was quickly replaced by recognition.  _ She recognised me _ . 

“Kiki?” She hesitantly called out, and I nod, voice stuck in my throat. Her eyes widen, and I could see tears well up the moment tears appeared in my eyes. She slowly walked around the couch. I meet her halfway, but she suddenly recoils. 

“Why are you here?” She asks, sneers almost. My eyes widen at the reaction. 

“Cassie…” I whisper, but she shakes her head violently. 

“No! You don’t get to come here after all those years!” She screams, lunching at me and pushing me back. I stumble, but I don’t fall. There was no strength behind that push. She screams again, slamming her fists against my chest. I wince, but not from the pain in my chest. 

“You can’t just… come here after all you’ve done” She hit again. 

It barely hurt, or at least, I could barely feel it. The only thing I could feel was the betrayal, the agonising pain in my heart. 

“You left me there! You left me alone!” She raged, but hits becoming softer, and softer. “You abandoned me! You left me alone. You... I-I …. I missed you” She sobbed, lifting her head to look at me. Her eyes were filled with tears, and she looked at me with a desperate expression. 

“I’m sorry” I could barely whisper. She burst out in another round of tears. 

“I missed you” She whimpered, and I wrap my arms around her tightly. She sobbed against my collarbone, holding me tightly. “Why did you leave me? I was so scared, so confused” I just stood there, unable to tell the story when tears were running down my face as well. Cassandra shook against me, sobbing openly. 

Slowly the sounds subdued, and for a few moments she just stood there, completely silent. 

“Why did you leave me?” She whispers again, much more composed this time. I swallow thickly, carefully untangling myself from her embrace. I look at her parents for a moment, but their looks were clear,  _ this was up to me to explain _ . 

I sigh, gesturing for her to sit down on the chair. Cassie never looks away, only looking at me as we both sat down. 

I told her everything I knew, and everything I could think of right now. Who our parents were, what they had done. How we grew up, and how our parents treated us. I told them about the police finding out about what my parents did, that I had to get rid of her when we decided to flee. 

I told her how I dropped her off, why I couldn’t go with her, and why I fled with my parents instead.  _ They would recognise me, and I wouldn’t be able to give her a life away from our parents’ legacy, and I fled because I’d rather flee than be in prison. But I’d also rather be in prison than expose Cassie.  _

Not like it mattered now, I was still telling her. 

I told her how I named her, when she was actually born, and how I was on the run for all those years until I was caught now 2 years ago. 

“So they’re really gone?” Cassie whispers softly, and I nod painfully. Not because I loved my parents, I was glad that they were gone, I was glad they couldn’t hurt Cassie, or anyone else anymore. But I was sad, I was sad for her, I was sad for what this might do to her, the knowledge who her parents were. 

“I’m sorry” I try, but she slowly shakes her head. 

“Don’t be, they deserved it” Cassandra mumbled, standing up and walking over to the window. Her hand slowly went to her face, covering it. But still, I could see tears leak from her eyes, down her cheeks almost torturously slow. 

“Cass?” Zoe softly called out, and Cassie whirled around. 

“Did you know?” She hisses, tears now freely running down her cheeks. But her gaze was focused on her parents instead of me. The dad sighs, his face filling with regret almost.  _ How long did you know that I was her brother? _

“We’ve known for a year now” He tells softly.

“And you decided to keep that for me?” She almost shouted back, but her voice still rose significantly in volume. I wince. 

“I asked them to” I whisper, almost too afraid to tell her. She looks at me with a confused expression on her face. 

“I didn’t want you to know me, I didn’t want you to know who your parents were. I knew it would hurt you as much as hurts me every day” I try to explain. “I told the police I killed you so they wouldn’t-“ 

“So they wouldn’t know I was alive?”  She finishes. But before I could confirm she was shaking her head. “Tell me you didn’t… please tell me you didn’t do that so I wouldn’t know” I look at her with silent wonder, because I had no idea what she was referring to. She slowly walks up to me, grabbing my hands. 

“Please tell me you didn’t end up in jail because of me” She whispers, and now I suddenly understood. But I couldn’t deny her statement. I shook my head, just barely because I was afraid to take my eyes off her. Cassandra burst out in tears again, leaning against my chest again. 

She sobbed loudly, not caring about anyone hearing her. “I hated you, I hated whoever left me alone. I never thought… you did that to protect me.” She whispered between the sobs. “You went to jail to protect me” She looks up at me, and I can’t help but smile sadly. 

“I love you so much, little sis. I was content with spending my life in prison knowing you were happy” Cassie sniffles, wiping away the tears with the palm of her hand. 

“You shouldn’t have to Kiki” She replies, and I can feel my heart skip a beat at the nickname. Just like I remembered her saying it when we were just little kids. And it was the best thing I had heard today. 

I take a deep breath. “When the FBI found you, I begged them not to tell you, I wanted to keep our parents away from you, even the knowledge of them existing” 

“Remember when that black car with those two policemen showed up last year?” Cassie’s mom asks softly, and my sister nods. 

“You told me to go to my room, and you said it was a misunderstanding later” Cassie recalled, and the mother nods. 

“They told us they found your brother, and knew who your parents were. But we wanted to see him first before telling you, just be sure if it was true, and take time to figure out how to tell you” She explained in a soft voice. 

Cassie whirls around to look at me again. “But you didn’t let them” She deducted, and I nod. 

“They wanted you to know me, but I didn’t.” I tell her, glancing at Peter and Zoe again. “They made a compromise, if I got out of prison because of you being alive, they wouldn’t tell. But if I didn’t, they would do anything to get me out”

“Including telling me” Cassandra added. “You should’ve told me…. I missed you so much” She whispered, I frown slightly, not daring to move at the moment. 

“You remember me?” I ask. I knew it was a weird question, because Cass obviously recognised me, knew who I was. But I still needed to know just how much she knew about me, how much she still remembered about me, about our parents and about our whole situation. 

I wanted to know more about  _ her _ . 

Cassie sniffles, wiping away her tears. “I was so confused when I woke up in a strange place, I remember waking up, not knowing where you were. They said I kept crying, asking about you. But I called for Kiki, and when I realised that was my nickname for you, I had forgotten your real name, or maybe I never knew your name” 

She takes a deep breath, and I slowly sit down on the couch again. She follows me, sitting down as well. Our knees were touching, but it comforted me right now. It showed me that she was really here, that after all those years, that after 7 full years I could finally see my little sister again. 

“I remembered you… but you never came for me” Cassie continues, glancing at Zoe and Peter. “My parents adopted me a month later, but I didn’t want to go with them. I wanted to wait for you, but you never came for me” 

I don’t know what to say, I didn’t know how to comfort her right now. So I stayed where I was, keeping my mouth shut. 

“Over the years, I started to forget more about you, until I could only remember your face… I also forgot that eventually” Cassie looks down, rubbing her eyes again with her palm to wipe away the new tears, she shook her head “I didn’t remember you a few moments ago, I recognised you.” 

I could feel my breath hitch at the implication. Of course she would forget, she was only 6 and a half when I dropped her off. Of course she would eventually forget. It was a fear that I never dared to think about before, but it was true, she forgot about me over all those years I had been gone. 

“I couldn’t remember what you looked like Mikey, and you… “ She stopped herself, sobbing silently. I had no idea what to do right now. Was it okay to hug her? Would she want me to hug her right? I shuffled closer to her, grabbing one of her hands instead. She glared at my hand, but didn’t pull hers away. 

“I can’t be mad at you knowing why you did what you did Kiki, but do you have any idea… do you know what it’s like forgetting what your own brother looks like?” She whispers, and I take a shuddering breath at the question before shaking my head slowly. Because no, I didn’t know what it was like. 

But I did know what it was like forgetting your baby sister, forget how she sounded, forget what she looked like without looking at a picture of her. I knew what it was like to forget what she looked like as a kid because I had no pictures of that. I knew what it was like forgetting her laugh. 

Or regretting giving her up at all. 

I knew Leo and Cassie’s parents were still near us, but they said nothing, and right now they didn’t matter to me. The only thing I cared about was my baby sister, and making sure she knew why I did what I did, and hoping she would forgive me. 

“I forgot you too” I whisper after a moment of silence, and Cassie didn’t seem one bit confused. She understood what I meant with that sentence, and she understood what it was like. 

“How are we going to do this? What is going to happen now?” Cassie asks after being silent for a few minutes. I glance at her, and it took me a moment to understand what she was talking about.  _ How do we continue now we know each other?  _

“I don’t know… I just know that I want to be a part of your life, I want to be your big brother again.” 

Cassie shakes her head, biting her lip. “I can’t leave my parents” She says softly, glancing at said parents. My eyes widen at the implication, shaking my head as well. 

“I would never ask you to” I stammer, shaking my head again. “I know when I gave you up that I wouldn’t get you back completely, you don’t have to choose between your parents or me. I would never” I try to explain, and her body visibly sags with relief that I wouldn’t force her to choose. 

_ Me or your parents, you can only pick one _ . But I would never. 

“We live close by Cassie, Mikey can visit you during the weekends, or you can come to us. And you can keep in contact with Whatsapp, or skype” Leo was eventually the one to speak up, and we both glance at him. 

“It’s only a 20 minute drive, we could take you there” Zoe comments. 

“You would do that?” Cassie asks breathlessly, and Zoe immediately nods in confirmation.

“Of course we would.” She says without hesitation. A smile appears on Cassie’s face, and she turns to me. 

“That would work right?” She asks me, and I nod as well. 

“I don’t want to ruin your life, I just want to be a part of it, Cassie” I told her, and she laughs, throwing her arms around me. 

“I want to be a part of your life as well Kiki” 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaaanndd.. they met! Told ya it was real this time xD So what did y’all think?


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You guys are seriously the best! *Hug*

 

"This is my room" Cassie announces proudly, grinning like the Cheshire cat. I can't help but copy her smile, it was just so contagious. I glance around the room with wonder. It wasn't a very big room, but it was filled with paintings, notes, sentences, pictures. Too many to count really.

"These are amazing" I say with a smirk, walking to one wall of her room, and inspecting the painting. Unlike my drawings and paintings, hers were filled with bright colours, happy scenery and still so beautiful, and a rare vulnerability to them. My little sister painted these, all of them.

"They're not that good, but I'm really proud of them" Cassie explained with the same infectious smile as she sat down on her bed.

"Are you kidding? These are amazing Cas" I shake my head, turning around. Cassie looks at me with an uncertain gaze in her eyes, but she eventually smiles nevertheless.

"Thanks" She whispers, rubbing her hands together. "I painted most of them back in New Hampshire, but I took a few with me." Just a few. Which meant that she had so much more back home.

"And the others?" I can't help but asking, luckily she doesn't seem to mind the question, shrugging slightly.

"Gave them away to care facilities in the area, figured they could use them still" She says, standing up herself and walking over to one side of the wall. "These pictures are from Dover, they remind me of that place when I'm here."

She glances at me for a moment, a flicker of doubt flashing through her eyes. "I know I didn't, but to me Dover is my hometown, where I grew up" She states softly, and I can feel my heart jump ever so slightly. Of course it wasn't exactly her hometown, and she didn't exactly grow up in Dover either.

She has only lived there for a few years of her life, she grew up in Queens for the first 6 and a half years, but I couldn't blame her for not considering that her hometown. She was rarely allowed outside, she had no concept what New York or Queens really meant, so there were no emotional ties to Queens.

And she certainly didn't have a pleasant time when she was still with our parents.

Zoe and Peter gave her a loving home, a town she would feel safe in, and a place where she could be herself. I smile slightly despite myself, glancing at the art again. They truly did allow her to be herself judging by all the art that was in her room. I turn towards her again, and she looked right back.

"I'm glad your parents could give you that" A hometown, a place you felt safe. It was still weird addressing them as such, as parents that is. Because I was talking about the 'parents' of my own little sister here. Not adopted sister, not half-sister or any other loophole that can be found.

I was talking about the parents of my biological sister, parents that weren't mine.

"They gave me a lot, but not everything" Cassie eyes at me again, and I can hear the underlying message in her statement. Not everything, they didn't give me her biological family, or at least the knowledge of her biological family. I left, and her parents could never replace her brother.

Not like I wanted them to.

"I'm sorry Cassie" My little sister sighs at the statement, turning towards the window gracefully.

"I'm sorry too… I know why you did it, and I don't blame you" She whispers, before turning around again to face me. "I guess I just need time to process that I can't be angry at you anymore."

"And the fact that you now know who your biological family is?" I ask, and Cassie snorts at the sentence, a smile appearing on her face again.

"That too" She mutters, the smile not faltering until she sat down on her bed. She looks down at her hands, picking at them for a while. She doesn't look up. "Is it… is it weird to call me Cassandra?" I blink a couple of times at the question, and for a moment I had no idea what she meant with that question.

But then it dawned down on me, I hadn't known her as Cassandra when she was born, I gave her that name when I gave her away.

"You're been Cassandra to me for 7 years now, so no." I tell her honesty. "And truth be told, Amaya never suited you" Cass smiles at the statement, shaking her head in confirmation.

"Thank you for not giving me a shitty name" She laughs, before her face turns serious again. There's a short moment of silence that nobody dared to break. "And thank you for giving me an opportunity at a happy life. I hate knowing what you went through to me, but I don't know what I would do knowing who my parents were when I was younger, before coming to terms with who I am"

"What do you mean?" I frown, taking an almost hesitant step towards her. Cassie takes a shuddering breath.

"I mean, it now makes sense knowing how our parents treated us, but I wasn't always like this. I started doubting myself, despite having my parents with me, I wasn't happy for a long time. I was really shy at first, and I had these nightmares, flashes of our life together I guess that really bothered me." I look down in shame, but I don't say anything.

Because I now realised, how alike Cassie and I were in some aspects. Our love for art being one thing, but the low self-esteem… I was horrified to admit that I could understand her feelings, because I had felt them too.

"My parents got me to talk to someone. I know she wrote my memories down somewhere, but the more I started to forget about our parents, the more open I got, the more bubbly and more sure of myself I got. I started painting, drawing and taking these photographs and I loved it. I'm happy right now, even though there was always something missing"

"That's a good thing right?" I ask.

"It is… I just don't know if I would be the same person if I had known this when I wasn't happy with myself. As much as I am angry at you for leaving me, or doing that stupid sacrificing thing… -" She looks at me, bright blue eyes piercing mine. "I'm afraid I wouldn't be the same if you had told me before"

TMNT

"Are you okay?" Leo asks softly, his voice filled with genuine concern. I swallow thickly.

"I guess… it was just hard saying goodbye to her.. again" I whisper, glancing at my oldest brother. "I'm sorry for ditching you the moment she showed up"

"Don't worry about that little bro" Leo smiles slightly, glancing at me for a quick moment before he dragged his gaze back to the road again. "I would've done the same thing, and I didn't mind being alone with her parents" I nod numbly at the statement, allowing my eyes to focus on the road again as well.

We had stayed for dinner at Cassie's house, but dad had said he wanted us home before 10. He didn't want Leo still driving on slippery roads so late, afraid that exhaustion would negatively affect his driving or something. I wasn't about to go against dad's wishes, after all he has done for me.

I smirk silently, leaning back with a soft sigh. I had a dad… I had a mom, and my little sister had her own parents that she loved, and that loved her. And yet, our real, biological parents were gone, dead. It was a messed up situation for sure, but I didn't care at the moment, I was just glad Cassie accepted me so quickly.

I snap my head towards Leo against when he puts his hand on mine. He was still focused on the road, but he glances towards me for a moment.

"What's wrong?" He asks, and I frown at the question. It was only then did I realise the tears streaming down my face. I sniffle, rubbing the tears away with my free hand.

"Nothing.. I just.." I stop for a moment, thinking for a few seconds. "Just everything I guess… meeting her again, seeing her so upset about our family. Her admitting I did the right thing by dropping her off-"

"How come?" He asks, squeezing my hand for a moment before putting it on the steering wheel again. I look down slowly, ignoring the sign that said we were almost home, just a few more minutes.

"We were both messed up because of our parents. They were rarely around, and I remember them acting as if they didn't love us when we were around, especially Cassie"

"Because you were a boy, and could follow his legacy" I nod at Leo's statement, taking a shuddering breath. It was why they made me kill Cassie, because they thought I was too afraid to go against them, but also because they didn't see the potential in Cassie because she was a woman.

My biological mom lured those children in, but my biological dad did the rest, the heavy lifting so to speak. He thought I would become like him in the future. I scowl at the thought, too bad, you didn't mess me up enough.

"I don't know, they were just bad parents" Understatement of the century. "They would hit us sometimes. I mean, I usually protected Cas but she still saw it y'know? And even if you don't remember something, it can still haunt you" At least, that's what my therapist told me, both of them did.

The one I had in prison, and the one I had right now, but admittedly, I liked the latter more because I choose her myself. The one in prison got assigned to me, and I just had to accept it or be put into solitary for not going to her meetings. I didn't mind going, I just wasn't as open and comfortable.

Might also be because that woman didn't know the truth, wasn't allowed the truth.

"When I gave her away… she was still traumatised, and still had nightmares and stuff." I continue with a soft voice. "But the more she forgot about our past, the better she got. She got more open, more sure about herself."

"And because she has grown past your past, she can handle it better" Leo deducts softly, and I nod absently.

"I guess so." I mutter. "She's better off with her adoptive parents, and I mean… I think I did the right thing to give her away to make her life better. If I hadn't.. she would've been more like me" Leo glances at me at the statement, a frown on his face, a frown I had come to know all too well.

It was a frown that read disappointment, but that particular emotion wasn't necessarily meant for me. It was disappointed in the sense that he pitied me, that he didn't want me thinking of myself, or something in my life, like that. It was a frown that I had seen so many times in the last 11 months now.

"There's nothing wrong with that little bro" Leo utters without a hinge of hesitation. I fall silent at the statement, staring at him in wonder. Did he truly mean that? I knew he loved me, I knew my whole family loved me regardless of not sharing biological ties, or being officially adopted in the first place.

They all did they have for a very long time. And I know that I've changed a lot, The nightmares I have aren't as frequent anymore, aren't as disturbing and disruptive for my sleeping pattern. I've been more open, both to my family and people outside of my family, I've been calmer.

I'm slowly starting to found peace I guess.

"Cass is so much like you Mikey, you don't see it maybe, but I did" Leo continues when I don't answer him. "She has the same humour as you do, and her smile is so alike to yours" You know, when I actually did smile. More nowadays than I had been smiling in the past, that's for sure.

It was actually kind of unsettling at first, when I realised how easy it was for me to smile nowadays. I was getting there.

"It might sound weird, but I think that's who you really are Mikey. If you hadn't been mistreated your whole life, you would've been like her." Joyful, loved, expressive, outgoing, and yet sympathetic. Independent, yet dependent at the same time. A bundle of joy, but someone who needs time for himself nonetheless?

Because that's what Cassie is, that's what Amaya was at rare occasions. That was who I would be if I had been raised by Shen and Yoshi my whole life?

"I guess so" I eventually mutter, not really sure how to react. I shuffle on the spot slightly, watching familiar buildings shoot past us. Almost there, almost off the highway. "Thanks for coming with me Leo"

At the sentence, Leo chuckles. "You've already said that" He says with a smile plastered on his face. "You're family now, little brother. Of course I would go with you, of course I would drop you off. At least until you have your own license" I grin at the remark, rolling my eyes.

"Do you feel relieved you told her?" Leo eventually asks, and I know exactly what he was asking for. Do I regret telling Cassie about me, about who our real parents were? Do I regret showing up on her doorstep? Do I regret meeting her, knowing that now I could never not see her again.

Right now, I opened a door that couldn't be closed. I knew I wouldn't be able to not see her anymore, she wouldn't let me, and I wouldn't be able to stay away now. Did I regret bringing her into my life basically.

And I guess, did I regret any of my actions 7 years ago? Did I regret dropping her off?

No. I knew the answer to that last question. No, I did not. Prison wasn't fun, being on the run wasn't fun either. But I would never change it, because it meant I had given Cass a normal life, a good life with happy parents, and without the knowledge of her biological parents so she could figure out who she was on her own.

Without limitations.

But I didn't know exactly how to feel right now, I felt relieved that she knew, I felt delighted that she wanted to know me. But I was still worried how this knowledge would affect her. She acted brave, but I could see that what I told her had affected her. Though, I never got the chance to answer Leo's question.

Without any warnings, something collided with the back of our car. I could hear Leo shout in surprise and fear at the collision, and I immediately froze the moment the car swayed dangerously. Screeching of the tires, the car swirling to the side with dangerous speeds. Noises all around me, but it happened too fast.

And then I noticed the car coming straight towards my side of the car.


	14. Chapter 14

Noises were all around me, voices, screeching. I could hear people scream, I could hear people cry loudly, I could hear them shout in panic. Footsteps far away, footsteps closing in and approaching me. Someone spoke, but I had no idea what they were saying, they were too far away.

I groan softly, and my heart jolts the moment pain runs through my body. I was numb, and yet, I hurt everywhere. My whole body ached, and my head started pounding the more I woke up.

I slowly blink my eyes open, frowning when all I saw was darkness. No.. I could see flashes of lights far away, lights directed my way. Sirens… Sirens were getting closer, multiple ones. They were coming for me. I gasp, and suddenly it all became so clear what had happened to me.

The car hitting us, I couldn't control the car anymore, and the last thing I knew was another car hitting Mikey's-

I stop immediately, feeling another jolt of panic run through me.

"Mikey?" I croak, craning my neck. I groan again, coughing painfully. There was an immense pressure on my chest, and my ribs started hurting the more I became aware of my surroundings. I blink a couple of times, and slowly, agonisingly slow my eyes get used to the darkness around me.

I swallow thickly, glancing at my youngest brother, upside down in the car with his seatbelt pressed against his body so tightly. His hair was falling down, and a small stream of blood was travelling down his head, mixing with his hair. It was only then that I realised I was upside down as well.

And Mikey wasn't awake.

"Mikey?" I ask again, ignoring the pressure building up in my head. "MIKEY!" I scream, struggling wildly. My hands flew to the release of the seat belt, but it didn't budge. Any other time I would have realised I was putting too much pressure on it because it was keeping me from crashing to the ground.

But not now, not when my little brother was upside down, unconscious with blood streaming down his face.

"Hey hey!" A foreign voice suddenly exclaimed, and I squint when light flooded our car.

"My brother! You have to help him!" I immediately scream, struggling again.

"Woah woah son, calm down" The man said, but it didn't help one bit. "What is your name?"

I glance at him, feeling tears appear in my eyes, streaming down.. streaming towards my forehead before mixing with my hair. It was strange, and it only caused me to panic more.

"Leonardo" I hiccup, far past the point of being embarrassed. "My little brother, he's not responding"

"Just calm down okay? We will help your brother" He spoke calmly, turning back for a moment and shouting something. "What is his name?" He asks.

"Mikey" I whisper, taking a shuddering breath.

"There are a few other cars who were also hit, but an ambulance is arriving right now, they're coming to help you and your brother." He spoke, and I nod shakily. "Do you know the phone number of a parent or a guardian?" I nod again, squinting slightly and telling the number of mom, the only one I really remembered.

"That's good" The man says, taking out his phone and glancing back for a moment. "The paramedics are here, they will get you out okay? I won't be far but I will call your parents so they will come here. It's all going to be alright" For some reason, I believed him when he said that.

I nod again, and I can't help but glance at Mikey again. The light disappeared for a moment and there were a few voices before the light appeared again. A shuddering breath escaped my lungs at the sight of a paramedic, and another one soon followed.

"Leonardo?" The man asks in a clear voice, I nod quickly, eyes darting to Mikey again. "My name is Alex, this is my colleague Anne. We're gonna get you out."

"Mikey first" I croak, and Anne smiles in a comforting matter.

"We have to be careful sweetie we don't know how badly he is injured." She says softly, starting to climb into the car. "Can you tell me what is hurting?" I frown slightly at the question, willing myself to focus on the pain. My whole body was aching, but it wasn't really bad.

"My chest.. it hurts to breathe, and my body's aching" I mumble, wetting my lips, and taking a shuddering breath. "My head is hurting, a lot" I add, and Anne nods softly.

"No pain in your legs, or back?" She asks me, but I shake my head. "That's good, that would be bad. I'm going to cut your seatbelt, and then Alex here will catch you so you don't hurt yourself on the glass okay?" She explains, and I nod again, limbs trembling ever so slightly at the prospect of getting out.

Anne reaches into her jacket, taking out a special knife and placing it against the seatbelt. I could feel firm hands on my shoulders, lifting me up slightly to relieve the pressure of the seatbelt on my chest. Immediately air floods my lungs, and my head spins almost painfully at the sudden rush of oxygen.

The knife easily cuts through the material of the seatbelt, and before I know it I'm gently lowered to the ground. I could feel Alex carefully guide me out of the car, until I was sitting down on something soft. A blanket or a jacket or something. But it wasn't the cold road, that was for sure.

"Come with me, I will check you over" A new voice says softly, and a hand is put on my shoulder. I jerk away quickly, shaking my head despite the pain it caused me.

"I'm not going anywhere before I know Mikey's okay" I state with a slight glare. The woman didn't know who Mikey was, but I didn't care at the moment. I was only a meter away from the car, and yet, it felt like I was so far away. Too far away.

I manage to tear my eyes away from the car, glancing around. There were police cars and ambulances everywhere around me. The whole road, except for one lane was blocked. And our car wasn't the only one. I pale significantly all of a sudden. There was another car, quite close to ours.

The whole front was crushed, glass and blood littering the road. And a body bag was being wheeled away the moment I was looking.

A soft groan suddenly escaped the car, and I was immediately up. Mikey. Pain completely forgotten I stumbled back to driver's seat of the car.

"Mikey?" I call out, wincing as glass crunched beneath my feet.

"Leo?" Mikey's groggy voice came from inside the car. I could feel Anne glance at me from the other side of the car.

"I'm here otouto, I'm here" I whisper, and Mikey groans softly. Then, he slowly opens his eyes to look at me. The side of his head was still filled with blood, and his blue eyes were dull and filled with pain. Anne looks down for a moment, before glancing at me again, and eventually Mikey.

"Mikey?" She asks, and it was only then that he seemed to realise there was something else with him. "My name is Anne, I'm going to get you out of the car okay?"

There was a silence on Mikey's part, and I'm sure he was frowning, but I just couldn't see it as he had his head turned away from me. Eventually, he nods groggy, a whine of pain leaving his throat. I wince at the sound, I never wanted to hear any of my brothers, or my family in pain.

"Can you tell me what hurts Mikey?" Anne asks softly.

"Chest" Mikey mutters, taking a raspy breath to prove his point almost. "And my knee" He silently adds after a few seconds.

Anne nods with a relieved smile on her face. "No pain in your neck or your back?" She asks.

"M'bit, sore m'stly" Mikey mumbles, and Anne nods again, taking out the knife she had also used to cut my seatbelt.

"That's good" She whispered herself. "I'm going to cut your seatbelt right now, Alex here will catch you so you won't hurt yourself more. Is that okay?"

"Get me out" Mikey whispers, turning his head back to me. "Leo get'me out" He slurred, and without thinking I stuck my arm through the car, brushing against his hand. I stifle a hiss when pain runs through my ribs but I ignore the pain. The only thing that mattered right now was comforting my little brother.

"They will Mikey, just a few seconds" I try to calm him down, and he nods shakily. I could see Alex' hands reach for Mikey's shoulders, lifting him up slightly. Then Anne cuts through the seat belt, knife quickly forgotten as she helps her colleague with getting Mikey out of the car. I was immediately up.

I could feel adrenaline slowly leaving my body, and the pain was starting to get worse but I didn't care. Mikey was set down on the ground, and someone wrapped a blanket around him.

"Leo" Mikey whispers, looking at me. He seemed more coherent, but his eyes were still clouded with pain. I groan low in my throat as I sit down, and Mikey immediately leans into me.

"I'm here Mikey we're okay" I whisper, throat tight from the tears. I was supposed to be the older brother, I was supposed to protect my younger brother. But the moment I spoke those words, I broke out into tears. I sob, burying my face in Mikey's collarbone as I hold him tight against me.

I could faintly feel a blanket being wrapped around me, but I don't pay attention to it. I can only cry, focus on Mikey's shaking form as he tried his hardest not to follow my example. I ignore the pain continuously increasing in my ribs my head starting to pound painfully with every beat of my heart.

Mikey didn't cry, but it was clear how shaken he was.

But all that mattered that we were both okay.

TMNT

"Neither of you have any broken bones, and the CT scan showed no internal bleeding" The nurse said with a bright smile. "You're both very lucky" She added, and from the side I could hear Mikey snort as the sentence.

"Very lucky" He mutters, but loud enough for us to hear it. I glance at him for a moment, anything to keep my focus off one of the nurses currently stitching my arm up.

"You are" The nurse insists, glancing at the nurse that was currently stitching up the wound on Mikey's face. "It could've been much worse. You were lucky you were wearing your seatbelt too" She pointed out, walking over to Mikey to inspect the IV that was pumping a mild sedative into his arm.

The same IV was currently in my arm, and I was grateful for it. My ribs had started to bother me more and more, and so had my head. So after the nurse rang dad if it was okay to start treatment, they gave us the painkillers and started to stitch some of the wounds, and scan for other injuries.

They had taken an X-ray of both our chests, CT scans for internal bleeding, and drawn blood.

We were currently in a separate room instead of the ER. Just for some extra privacy while we waited. Which I knew Mikey appreciated. We were both sitting on the same hospital bed, mere inches between us.

"There, all done" The nurse treating Mikey said softly, snapping off the thread, and putting the needle away. "The cut itself wasn't bad, the stitches are to minimise scarring. You'll need to come back in a few weeks to get them removed, but your parents will handle everything" He explained, and I could see the wince when Mikey heard that sentence.

Parents. Even if we all understood to whom he was referring, the word itself was still a sore subject if that made sense. Both because his biological ones were messed up serial killers, and because his current 'parents' weren't really his parents. Foster parents, but in our eyes parents nonetheless. We didn't care about formalities, but we all knew Mikey did.

The nurse treating me also finished her stitching quickly, but neatly and telling me the same applied to me in terms of taking care of the stitches and getting them removed again. It was then that someone knocked on the door. I glance at the nurse that listed our result from the scans just moments ago, and she quickly made her way to the door.

"My name is Hamato Yoshi, they said my sons are in here" A familiar voice spoke from the other side. My eyes immediately widen, and I snap my attention to the door. The nurse nods, door opening to reveal mom and dad standing there.

"Mom, Dad!" I cry out, voice cracking. They immediately ran towards the both of us, wrapping their arms around us.

"Oh my children, you are safe now, you are alright" Dad murmured while mom just sobbed happily, or maybe from relief, I didn't know.

"Leo, Mikey!" Raph's familiar voice suddenly ran through the room, and I only sobbed louder when I heard two pair of footsteps approach. More arms wrapped around the hug, and I can't help but smile shakily through the tears.

"We're okay… it's okay" I murmur, sniffling and reluctantly pulling out of the hug. Mom slowly turned to the only remaining nurse, I guess the other two had left when our family entered.

"How are they?" She asks with a soft voice. I glance to the side as Don sat down next to me, leaning into me. I allow him with a watery smile on my face. I'm careful not to move too much, to avoid ripping out my IV and to avoid agitating my ribs even more.

Raph was now sitting next to Mikey, allowing the latter to fully lean against him and wrapping an arm around him carefully, to avoid hurting Mikey. I smile despite the situation. It was so endearing to see Raph act all soft. We knew he was a big softie, but for him to display it so freely was rare.

"Leonardo hit his head pretty hard, he sustained a grade 1 concussion. He should be monitored for the first 24 hours but without complications he will recover quickly. Within days is my estimate. He didn't break any ribs, but he did bruise them so they will be sore and hurting for awhile. I will describe some painkillers for both of them. He also has a cut on his arm that needed to be stitched. They will need to be taken out in a few weeks" The nurse explained.

Mom nods, and I can see how nervous she was, glancing at us with worried looks. I just smile lazily at her, too tired right now to really speak up, and try to convince her. Especially when I knew it wouldn't work unless the nurse told her I was okay.

"Mikey hit his head as well, but no concussion we think. He did have a wound on his head that we stitched, they will also need to be removed in a few weeks. He didn't break his ribs either, but I recommend the subscription of painkillers. He hit his knee pretty hard when the car flipped, but the x-ray showed no broken bones."

Mom turned to us again, tears brimming in her eyes.

"Oh babies" She whispers, walking over to us again and pulling us in a quick hug again.

"Mom we're okay" I could hear Mikey murmur in mom's embrace. But even he couldn't suppress the groan of pain that escaped his mouth.

"I was just so worried when I got the call" She whispers, pulling out of the hug and cupping Mikey's face gently. Mikey just stayed silent, tears brimming in his eyes as he looked at mom.

"Can we take them both home?" Dad was the one to eventually ask the important question. I glance at the nurse at the question, but she smiles gently.

"You can Mr. Hamato, I will get someone qualified to release you. It shouldn't take long" She explains, looking at the clipboard in her hand. "Just remember to take it easy, make an appointment to get those stitches out, and watch Leonardo's concussion. Excuse me" She excuses herself.

Dad nods politely, watching as the nurse exits the room. He immediately turns to the both of us, walking to us but stopping inches in front of us.

"Are you both alright?" He whispers, and I knew he wanted to hear it from us instead of hearing it from a nurse. And he wasn't asking for our physical state right now he wanted to know how we were doing emotionally. I glance at Mikey for a quick second, but he was glancing at me with a tired look on his face.

He wanted me to answer it.

I shrug at the question, because really, how were we feeling? It all felt so surreal to begin with. I knew that there was a danger to driving, but I never expected to get into an incident, or flip the car upside down with someone else with me in the car. I would've never forgiven myself if it had been worse.

"I'm just… really shaken I guess" I mumble eventually, knowing dad would want a verbal answer. Dad seems satisfied with the answer glancing at Mikey.

"I'll be fine" He whispers, but he doesn't move from Raph's embrace.

We were both fine.

TMNT

I wasn't tired. No wait, scratch that, I was physically tired right now, physically exhausted. But I wasn't tired.

We were currently all sitting in the living room, not really doing anything but appreciating the fact that we were still together after the incident now four days ago. Leo and I had both been pretty shaken after the incident. We had both seen the dead bodies, hidden by the body bags, being wheeled away.

We had both realised how close we had come to dying really.

I close my eyes slowly. Mom was now carefully running his fingers through my hair, nail gently scratching my scalp and being mindful of the stitches.

It felt nice, and I felt myself relaxing fully. And I was sure that if I had been tired enough, I would've fallen asleep already.

I stiffen slightly for a moment when the phone started ringing. Mom hummed behind me, carting her fingers through my hair again.

"I will get it" Dad said, standing up. I glance at him, watching him reach for the phone we still had. A phone we also rarely used still now with the smartphones. "Hamato household" There was a short silence in the room, and I could see Leo glance at dad for a moment as well.

"I am sorry ma'am, but I cannot understand you" Dad murmured, frowning slightly. There was an inaudible response from the other side, and realisation dawned on Dad's face, and he turns to me. "Yes Cassandra, he is here" Dad voices, and my eyes widen slightly. He walks over to me, handing me the phone.

He didn't need to say who it was, because I already knew. And I had my suspicions why Cass was calling in the first place. I sit up a bit straighter, putting the phone against my ear.

"Hey Cass" I murmur.

"Mikey!" Cass yelled on the other side of the line. "My mom told what happened with the car! Are you okay?" Cassie said, voice significantly calmer. I take a breath, nodding even when I knew she couldn't see it.

"I'm okay, I bruised my ribs and hit my knee, but it's not bad" I tell her. I could hear Cassie take a shuddering breath on the other side of the line.

"I was so worried, mom told me and then you wouldn't pick up the phone, and I-" She stops herself, and I frown at the statement. My phone was still in the kitchen, and I always had it on silent. Of course I wouldn't have seen her call. "Are you both alright?" She eventually asks.

"We are Cass" I say, glancing at Leo. "Leo bruised his ribs as well, and got a mild concussion." There was a long silence, and the only thing I could hear from the other side was Cassie's soft breathing.

"I'm really glad you're alright" She whispers, and relief was all too evident in her voice. I smile gently. She didn't need to know about the nightmares I had… or rather, the increase in nightmares since the incident.

"Can't get rid of me that easily" I snicker softly, and I can hear Cassie chuckle at the remark.

"Right back at you, big bro" She says, and I can basically see the smile on her face. "Now I know you're alright, my parents and I were thinking, would you like to celebrate Christmas together?"

"You mean both our families together?" I ask, and Cass hummed on the other side of the line.

"Only if you didn't have other plans, I can understand if you have something planned already" She quickly adds, and I glance at dad with a soft smile.

"Only on the second day, dad's family's from Japan and they don't celebrate Christmas the way we do here. His family is coming over to celebrate the new year instead" I tell her, and dad nods. Because I had never actually experienced Christmas with this family before the upcoming one.

I was taken in in January after all. But they had all told me stories about how they celebrated Christmas in Japan. Here it was a time for families to come together, but in Japan that was during the new year instead. Christmas was a time for friends and couples instead, and because Dad's family still lived in Japan, they followed that tradition here as well.

Dad's father was fully Japanese, while his mother wasn't. She had been living in Japan since her 10th birthday, because her parents moved to Japan, but she was still from Irish descent. They adopted the Japanese culture, and dad grew up with those traditions as well before he met mom.

I mean, he first met Leo's biological mom when she travelled to Japan, and he eventually moved to America for her. Leo was partially Japanese, but for the most part Caucasian.

Mom, Tang Shen, was also Japanese from birth, but her family tree got a little complicated as well. Her grandfather from her father's side was Chinese, her grandmother Japanese. But her father moved to the America when he was really young. He grew up in this country, and married a woman here.

Just like dad, she was only half Asian. But whereas dad grew up in Japan, and with Japanese customs, mom did not. Mom's side of the family celebrated Christmas like any other American family, and met up with the family on the second day of Christmas each year.

The first day however… was open because dad's side of the family didn't celebrate Christmas.

"Oh I didn't even know" Cas breathes out on the other line. "Is that.. is that a yes then? We don't have anything planned for the first day either yet" I put a hand over the phone.

"Cassie asks if we want to celebrate Christmas with her family, is… is that okay?" I ask softly, glancing at mom, who was still sitting next to me. She smiles at the questions, tugging a loose strand of hair behind my ear.

"Of course it is, I would love to meet your sister" She says, glancing at dad for just a second, but he doesn't object either.

"Mom said it was okay" I tell her, and I could basically hear Cass smile on the other side of the line.

"Great! I will talk with my mom about the diner, she usually cooks dinner cause she's a professional cook, but I don't know how your family wants to celebrate..?" I smile at the rambling, and the slightly nervous voice on the other side.

"This is my first time with them as well remember?" I chuckle, and Cassie hums at the sentence. "But I'll talk with my parents as well."

"Oh, and Mikey?" Cass says softly.

"Yea?" I answer her, frowning slightly. There was a short silence from the other side, a silent breath being expelled.

"I love you, Kiki. And I'm really glad you told me." She tells me, so much sincerity behind her statement that I could feel my chest tightening.

"I love you too, Cassie." I whisper. There was another silence, before Cassie chuckles from the other side.

"Bye Kiki." She says.

"Bye, little sis." I chuckle, before she hangs up. I glance at mom, who just smiled at me. I smile back, leaning against her side again. She pulls me closer, and her fingers find their way into my hair again.

"I love you too, little one." Mom murmurs, kissing the top of my head. I just snuggle closer to her side, like I was a small child.

"Love you too, mom" I mumble, closing my eyes and allowing my mind to drift again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I know from personal experience that not all countries celebrate Christmas the same way. I know we don't. Christmas isn't that big here in the Netherlands, as we celebrate Sinterklaas instead. So I wanted to make sure how Japan celebrated it, before writing something about it that wasn't true.
> 
> So I hope it's somewhat accurate to how it's truly celebrated. Next chapter there will be some mentions of it, so if you see something that is wrong, or anything you know, don't be afraid to let me know!
> 
> (I'm not even sure Americans celebrate Christmas two days…?)


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry guys! I completely forgot, exams are coming up and I had to do an IELTS test yesterday, that took the majority of my day. Hope you can forgive me :3

"Mom?" I ask softly, trying to get my trembling limbs under control. This was mom, she was sweet, caring, she cooked for us, she took care of us. We were supposed to love her, I was supposed to love her. But that wasn't my mom, it wasn't how I would ever describe my mom to anyone.

That's how my classmates described their mom, but not mine.

"Leave me alone" Mom muttered, slurring her words. I could hear she had been drinking that weird liquid again. It smelled horrible, and mom and dad always started to act horrible if they had too much. We were never allowed to drink it though.

"Max said his family-" I stopped abruptly, a glass flying past my head and shattering in a thousand pieces behind me. I wince, feeling the leftovers of the drink spatter onto my back.

"Didn't I tell you to leave me the fuck alone?" Mom hisses, glaring at me. "And who the fuck is Max" It wasn't even a question anymore, because she didn't care. Because she didn't love me, or my sister.

"A classmate" I squeak out, too afraid to not answer her question. "They were celebrating Christmas" I quickly spew out as well, resisting the urge to close my eyes in fear. Dad said it was cowardly, that I couldn't be afraid of anything. It was a sign of weakness, and our family wasn't weak.

But I was, I was weak and afraid.

"Well we don't" Mom said curtly, sitting down again. "Waste of time. Now leave me alone or I'll throw a bottle" She hisses, grabbing the bottle that was near her and drinking the liquid straight from the bottle. She then looked at me, bottle ready to be thrown.

I was out before she could do so.

TMNT

A loud scream erupted through the house. I was immediately up, shoving my things under the bed without much care, because I knew that scream, that scream belonged to my sister.

"You little shit!" I could hear dad yell, and another cry, this time much closer. Without even thinking about the consequences I bolt out of the room. Almost immediately I realise what was going on. Dad was holding Amaya, my little sister, by her arm, hand raised and ready to hit her.

My eyes widen at the red spot already forming on her cheek. Hurt her again.

"Dad no!" I cry, bolting over to her immediately. The hit lands on my shoulder, it doesn't even hurt. Without wasting time, and taking advantage of dad's confusion, I pry Amaya away from dad. "Run" I tell her, shoving her away.

"Get back here you menace!" Dad yells, trying to step around me but I step in front of him without a second thought. His eyes darken at the action, glaring down at me. Then, before I can react, something solid connects with my cheek. I tumble to the floor, pain spreading across my face.

Something connects with my stomach, and I cry out, trying to curl into myself. But dad just keeps hitting, kicking me. I lay there, not trying to move and stiffening my cries as much as I could. Dad hated it when I reacted, he hated it when I tried to flee from him. I had learned that the hard way.

And I followed him, I never went against his wishes, I didn't talk about the fact that my parents didn't love me even when the principal asked. She was suspicious, but I denied it. I followed dad into that room, with the blood, the knives, and sometimes with a girl, terrified and crying.

But I would never allow him to hurt my baby sister.

"Honey?" I could vaguely hear mom's voice, and dad gave one last kick before he stepped back. "She's awake" She continued speaking to dad. The latter frowns, glaring down at me. I bite back a whimper, averting my gaze fearfully. Dad huffs in disapproval.

"You're pathetic, son" He says. "But you'll learn one day, I'll make sure of it" He hisses, turning around, and walking away. I sob quietly, pressing my forehead against the cold floor.

"Kiki?" Amaya whispers softly, and I could feel two hands on my arm. I recoil, hissing in pain. "I'm sorry" She whimpers, and I slowly get up until I was sitting instead of laying.

"It's not your fault" I whisper, but she shakes her head.

"I made a mess, daddy was mad because of me" She says in a soft voice. I look at her sadly, she shouldn't have to worry about that, she was only 5. She should be carefree, play with barbies and with friends, but our parents had denied her that since her birth, and I had no idea why.

I was allowed to go to school, so why wasn't she? I was allowed to go outside, she wasn't. I wasn't even allowed to talk about her outside, she was a secret to everyone except for us. Instead of the ounce of normalcy that I got, she was trapped. She was trapped in a house with parents who didn't love us.

"That's not your fault" I state, slowly getting up. Amaya looks at me warily, but follows me. I walk back into my room, the room my sister and I had shared since she was born. She slept on a worn mattress, and the only reason I still allowed her to, and not swap mattresses was because I was way too big for it, and she wasn't.

I ignore my injuries, it wasn't the first time dad hit me after all, and I climbed into my own bed. Not surprisingly, Amaya followed me without a second thought. She snuggles against me, and I wrap the blanket around her, holding her close.

"Merry Christmas" I whisper softly, and Amaya glances at me with a confused look.

"What is Merry Christmas?" She whispers, and I smile despite myself.

"A holiday, be with your family and celebrate" I tell her, trying to remember as much as I could from what Max had told me a few days ago. I didn't understand it fully either, but Max seemed so excited to celebrate it, and see his family again. Amaya seemed to think for a moment, before looking up at me with bright eyes.

Mikey

"I love you big brother" I smile, tugging her closer, ignoring the pain continuously spreading through my entire body.

"I love you too, always will"

"Mikey!" I immediately startle awake, eyes widening at the shout. "Hey otouto" Raph grumbles, but a concerned look was on his face. I frown slightly, glancing around to figure out what the hell was happening.

"Ya were having a nightmare… I think" He adds the last part hesitantly, gnawing at his lip. It was then that I realised the tears that were still continuously streaming down my cheeks. I shakily bring a hand up to my cheek, wiping the liquid away, but it was soon replaced by even more tears.

"Oh.." I mumble, staring at Raph, not really knowing what to say to him right now. For 16 years of my life I was either the older brother, or I was on my own. Being comforted was still foreign to me.

"Ya were whimpering like ya were in pain, and then ya just.. started crying." Raph explained, trying to make sense of what happened himself. "I don't think ya were sad" He adds softly. I scrunch up my nose at the remark.

"I was" I whisper softly. "I was sad because it was a good memory with my sister" I tell him, and Raph's gaze softens slightly. He eventually sighs, shifting so he was sitting next to me. I crawl upwards, sitting up instead of laying down.

"Wanna talk about yer dream?" Raph asks softly, and I gnaw at my lip at the question. Did I want to talk about it?

"It was the year before we had to flee." I start, averting my gaze. And a year before I had to leave my little sister. "I was 9, I think. Cass was 5 at that time" I sniffle slightly, wiping at the tears in an attempt to make them go away completely.

"What happened?" Raph asks, not moving from his spot. I blink a couple of times, before eventually settling on my lap instead. It was easier to not look at my older brother when I said things like this.

And it was easier to leave out the fact that dad hit me. "Just me and my sister, it was Christmas." I whisper, rubbing at my burning eyes.

"Is it cause it's Christmas tomorrow?" Raph asks, shifting on the spot until he was sitting next to me, back against the wall behind me. I glance at him for a moment.

"I guess so." I admit with a shrug. It made sense for me to remember that now, with the prospect of being able to celebrate Christmas with my little sister again. Of course my brain would remember those times I celebrated it with my old family, when my parents couldn't care less about Christmas.

Who the hell would have the heart to celebrate Christmas when a girl was locked up in their basement? I scowl at the thought. I was happy they were gone, they were horrible parents, they deserved to die without a question. They didn't even try to deny the accusations at all, the only thing they tried was make me equally as guilty.

But they deserved to suffer, they deserved to rot in prison for the rest of their lives. They deserved everything for hurting all those girls. They got the easy way out.

"Do you want me ta stay?" Raph interrupts my thoughts, and I frown for a moment, glancing at the clock in my room. It was just 2AM, I hadn't even realised. I turn on my side, glancing at him.

"Please?" Raph grins at the sentence, shifting once again so he was laying down, pulling the blanket over the both of us. I snuggle against his chest, and Raph wraps his arms around me.

TMNT

It used to be so easy, I used to know what to say every time I was with her. I was completely at ease around her. Not anymore.

"Hey" I smile, almost uneasily. The first time seeing her again it had been so easy. We were both reluctant to show emotion, she didn't know who I was at all. I knew how to react, but now, seeing her with her parents at either side…

"You look better" Cass smiles softly, cocking her head. I snort at the sentence.

"Wish I could say the same" I snicker. Or maybe I was just overthinking everything. Cass smiles at the remark, closing the small distance between us and hugging me without hesitation. A small tinge of pain runs through my ribs, but they had been getting a lot better since the accident now over a week ago.

"Merry Christmas, big brother" She mumbles, staring at me with a bright grin on her face. I swallow thickly, torn between whatever emotion I should be displaying. Happiness because I could feel Cass was accepting me, I was happy to know that Cassie would be in my life again after all those years.

But I was sad, because no matter how much she accepted me, she couldn't remember everything that I did. She probably didn't remember that I wished her a merry Christmas a year before I left her. She probably didn't remember all the times I said that I loved her. She probably didn't even remember our parents hating us.

The trauma was still there, but her memories weren't.

"You too, little sis" I grin, turning to her parents. "And Merry Christmas to you too, it's nice to see you again" I say politely, and the mom smiles kindly.

"Likewise Mikey" She says, bending her knees just a little bit so she was the same height as me. But she didn't try to hug me, for which I was both grateful, but also a bit disappointed. Hugs were still.. scary, if that was the right word. They made me feel trapped, restricted instead of comforting me.

Except with my family, because I trusted them with my life right now, but anyone else was a no go. I glance at Cassie, she was an exception as well.

"Hi, you must be Mikey's father" Cassie's mom said, turning her attention to dad, who had just walked in.

"I am, it is a pleasure to officially meet you, Mr and Mrs Eastman" Dad said, but the latter waved him off, as expected.

"Call me Zoe, Yoshi. No need for formalities right?" She smiled, and despite there not being any biological ties between her and Cassie, I could see that her cheerful attitude had affected Cassie big time.

"Call me Peter" Cassie's dad said, and Yoshi nodded as he accepted his hand.

"Do you mind if we use the fridge? We have things in our bag that needs to keep cool" Zoe asks, and Yoshi shook his head.

"Not at all, Zoe. If I may inquire, what are you making for us tonight, or must that remain a surprise?" There's a playful smile on his lips, and I can't help but smirk as well. Dad tried to act all formal, it was how he was raised after all, but he loved to joke, and he loved to prank us in his own way.

Dad didn't smile often, but a cackle or a snicker fit him better.

"It's chicken, a family recipe from my grandma" Zoe revealed, glancing at the cooling bag in Peter's hands. "I read online that you eat a lot of chicken during Christmas, so I tried to honour that. Oh, I also hope you don't mind if I brought presents, I read that it's generally only given to couples-"

"Zoe" Dad cut her off with an amused smile. "That is very considerate of you but you do not need to fear upsetting us in our traditions. The boys have done so enough already" He snickered, and Zoe was quiet for a moment before laughing as well. It wasn't like Zoe was wrong, she was completely right.

Dad told me that his family, and a lot of Japanese people eat massive amounts of KFC during the holidays, and that you had to order 6 weeks in advance even to get your order on Christmas day.

"I can imagine, they're not Japanese. At least, Cassie told me only Leonardo is" Yoshi nods in confirmation.

"Even he is mostly Caucasian. And while it is true that I was raised on Japanese traditions, I have adapted those traditions over the years. My other two sons have changed the way we celebrate Christmas massively."

"And now your youngest is" Peter murmured thoughtfully, I glance at dad. As if I were to ask if that was okay, but he just smiled right back at me, eyes filled with happiness and acceptance. So I just smile right back. Dad eventually led Zoe and Peter to the kitchen to put away the food, leaving me alone with Cass.

I glance at her, and she glanced right back at me.

"I remember by the way" She says softly, and I frown. "I remember when we were little and you said Merry Christmas to me. It's all really vague, but I remember you saying it." She continues, as if she could read my confusion, as if she knew I was sad about that earlier because I thought she wouldn't remember.

Guess I was wrong.

"I'm glad you did, Cass" I tell her. She chuckles drily before glancing at the door dad had left open. "Now let's go, I want you to meet my two other brothers" I smile, and Cass mimics it, nodding eagerly. I chuckle at her enthusiasm, turning around and leading her to the living room, where my brothers were already waiting.

Brothers… brothers who were as much family as Cass was, as much as Shen and Yoshi were.

I had found a new family, a family that loved me, and I was allowed to keep my old one.


	16. Chapter 16

"You never visited them before?" Cass asks softly, walking next to me with soft steps. I shake my head, turning right. Snow had stuck to the ground two days ago, and the cold hadn't let up ever since. But mom had wrapped me in enough scarfs, and forced me into a thick jacket to make sure I didn't get cold.

"I didn't want to" I admit honestly, stuffing my hands in the pockets of my jacket. Cass hummed next to me, but remained silent for the last few minutes of our walk. I stopped when we arrived on the spot, gesturing vaguely to show Cass where I was looking. She had no idea after all, I did.

Cass turns to me instead, a frown on her face. "How do I address them?" She asks softly. I gaze at the two gravestones, a blank look on my face.

"I don't know what's right, whatever you want I guess, Cass." I shrug, crouching down. "Hello again" I spat, wiping away the snow that had settled on the names, hiding them from the rest of the world. Come to think of it, they deserved to be hidden from the world, they didn't deserve to be buried here in the first place.

But I was in prison when they were, so I hardly had a say in where they were buried. If I had, I had ordered them to cremate the bodies and scatter them all over the world. Instead, they were buried in a special section of the cemetery reserved for criminals.

"I don't remember much from you, and I'm glad I don't" Cass whispers. "You didn't deserve us, you didn't deserve Kiki" She says, her voice oddly calm. I glance at her in silence, allowing her to say what she needed to say right now. I had years with my.. our parents, she hadn't seen them since she was six.

But I guess, it was a blessing that she hadn't, and a curse that I had.

"I don't remember much from you, but I remember I hated you. My current parents are better to me than you could ever be." Cassie continues with a soft, but determined voice. "And I'm glad you're dead, so Kiki can live the life he deserves" I can see Cassie glance towards me at the last part.

I look right back at her, silent for a moment before wrapping an arm around her. She complies, leaning against my side and laying her head on my shoulder.

"You ready to go?" I ask softly after a while, and Cass nods against my shoulder. I stand up slowly, ignoring my body protesting slightly. Neither of us wanted to stay long here, but we both wanted to be here. To say goodbye I guess, to give Cassie closure and tell our biological parents that we were never coming back.

To tell them we had moved on, we found each other again, and we were both happy in our family.

"Thanks for taking me today" Cass whispers, hooking her arm around my arm. I smile, sparing a last glance at the two graves. I just stay close to her, not trusting my voice right now. It was Cassie who had asked if she could visit our parents' grave a few days ago, and if I would come with her.

She had a different relationship, a different memory, of our parents, but if she wanted to visit them, I was coming with her.

But I had no intention of ever coming back here on my own.

TMNT

(Don's POV)

"Does it bother you?" Mikey suddenly asks me, and I frown slightly.

"What is supposed to bother me?" I ask softly, and Mikey gnaws at his lip, shaking his head slightly.

"That I found my family?" Mikey answers, and my mouth opens slightly as I realise what he was talking about. "Does it bother you seeing me so happy, while you still don't know who your parents are?" He clarifies, but in all honesty, he didn't have to clarify that do me, I had already figured it out.

The answer, however, somehow eluded me at the moment.

"I don't-" I stop for a moment, glancing away from Mikey.

"You don't have to tell me if you don't want to" Mikey hurriedly says, and I roll my eyes at the hasty remark. It was something we hadn't accomplished to get out of Mikey, the endless excuses. We had managed to bring him out of his shell so much, and for someone seemingly so confident, he was still so insecure.

At times it was almost like he had a split personality. But we were getting there.

I grasp the pillow that was next to me, slamming it into his face. "Stop apologising, Mike" I tell him with a stern voice. Mikey grasps the pillow before I could hit him again, grinning widely. "And no, I'm not jealous. I'm happy for you"

"I know" He answers, and I frown again, Mikey just shrugs. "I can tell you're not jealous, but I can also tell you want to know them" Mikey explains, and I blink a couple of times.  _My family, my real biological family. Mikey was right, I did want to know them, I wanted to know everything any other child would know_.

I wanted stories about them, what they were like, even if they were bad. I wanted to compare-

I shake my head at the thought, looking at Mikey.

"How do you know things about us before we do?" I ask, and Mikey grins again.

"I don't know dude, it's just so obvious. I don't get how Leo and Raph haven't figured it out" He says. "But seriously dude, I know I'm the messed up one here, but you can always talk to me. Even if you want to go on a goose chase to find them" I laugh at the suggestion, shaking my head in amusement.

"I know you would, Mikey, and I love you for that" I say, and Mikey gives me a smile, a mixture between sad, content and apologetic. "But we've tried in the past, hired investigators. She gave me up, and didn't want her name or anything that could lead her to me, to be known" I tell him.

"I know, Dee" Mikey says, nudging me gently. I smile at him.

"It's okay though, really. I found a better family than I could ever ask for. I love you, little brother" I smile, bringing him closer to my side.

"Hey, I'm only a few weeks younger" Mikey whines against me, but he doesn't try to move out of the hug, until-

"MIKEY!" Raph suddenly yelled through the house. Mikey gulps, untangling himself quickly. Footsteps were heard going down the stairs.

"What did you do now?" I could hear Leo ask, and I glance at him to see him not even glancing up from the book he was currently reading, the one Mike had recommended to him actually. Mikey chuckles nervously.

"Remember that pink dye I wanted you to buy me?" He asks with a sheepish grin.

"For your 'art project'?" Leo asks, using his fingers to do the air quotes. He raises an eyebrow, and Mikey's face splits into a big grin.

"Mikey, you are so dead!" Raph yelled, emerging with a pink cloth in his hand.

"Lovely shirt you have there, the colour really compliments with your-" Mikey yelps before he can finish the sentence, Raph running straight at him. Mikey dodges with a gleeful laugh. "Bye guys, nice talk Dee" Mikey laughs, sprinting away.

"MIKEY!"

"He's so dead" I mutter, an amused smile tugging at my lips.

"My money's on Mikey, he's fast" Leo says, I grin, listening to Mikey's laughter echoing through the house, followed by Raph's screams.

"Raph'll get him eventually. Mikey loves the attention too much" I say, and Leo just shrugs. "I'm glad mom and dad convinced us to let him stay" I say thoughtfully, and Leo glances at me. For a moment an orange and red blur race past the window, and Leo chuckles when he realises Mikey has gone outside.

Probably still remembering dad's lecture after he broke the lamp the last time he pulled a stunt like that.

"He's family, he belongs here. And I'm glad he's come so far, he deserves nothing less than the whole world" Leo mutters, and I nod, glancing at the wall that now displayed not 3, but 4 frames. 1 birth certificate, and 3 adoption certificates.

Mikey was officially a Hamato.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Done! Guys! I can't thank you enough for everything. Your feedback has been so overwhelming, and I love you so so much! I hope you liked this last chapter/epilogue, and the story overall! Other stories to come soon!

**Author's Note:**

> Any ideas? I would love to hear them!
> 
> See ya!


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